OT: Musician jokes - Happy Friday!

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OT: Musician jokes - Happy Friday!

Postby sngrchk04 » Sat Jul 16, 2005 9:40 am

Enjoy! 8)


Q - What do you call a guitar player without a girlfriend?

A - Homeless

 

Q - How do you make a guitarist play quieter?

A - Put sheet music in front of him.

 

Q - Why are so many guitarists jokes one liners?

A - So the rest of the band can understand them.

 

Q - How do you know when the stage is level?

A - The guitarist is drooling out of both sides of his mouth.

 

Q - Did you hear about the guitarist who was in tune?

A - Neither have I.

 

Q -  How can you tell a guitarist is at your door?

A -  By the Dominos Pizza hat.

 

Q -  Why do guitarists put drumsticks on the dash of their car?

A -  So they can park in the handicapped spot.

 

Did you hear about the guitarist who was going to a gig and locked his keys in the car? It took him two hours to get the drummer out....

 

Q - How many bass players does it take to change a lightbulb?

A - Six, one to change it, and the other five to fight off the lead guitarists who are hogging the light

 

Q - What did the drummer get on his I.Q. test?

A - Drool.

 

Q -  Why'd the chicken cross the road?

A -  To get away from the drum solo.

 

Q -  What do you call a drummer with half a brain?

A -  Gifted.

 

Q - If a dollar bill was laying in the centre of a room, and the Easter Bunny, Santa Claus, a drummer with good time, and a drummer with bad time were standing in the corners, who would get the money?

A - The drummer with bad time since the other three don't exist.

 

Q -  How many drummers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A -  Five: one to screw in the light bulb and four to talk about how much better Neil Peart would have done it!

 

Q -  What's the last thing a drummer says in a band?

A -  "Hey, guys - why don't we try one of my songs? ..."

 

Q -  What did the professional drummer say when he got to his job?

A -  "Would you like fries with that?"

 

Q -  What's the difference between a drummer and a drum machine?

A -  About four bars by the end of the song.

 

Q -  How can you tell a drummer is walking behind you?

A -  You can hear his knuckles dragging on the ground

 

Q -  How do you know when there's a female vocalist at the door?

A -  She can't find the key and doesn't know when to come in.
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