Neal: virtuoso axe grinder and newly coronated pole smoker??
Posted: Fri Feb 16, 2007 6:27 amBy now, the cat has been let out of the bag.
While it’s none of our business, it might as well be said; Neal Schon is leading the life of an unattached dick-swinging bachelor once again.
The question is, which way is his dick exactly swinging these days anyhow?
A quizzical forum overture to be sure, but if I may, allow me to first explain….
If Jon Cain’s dredged-in-marmalade sapfests ever needed vindication, look no further than to Neal Schon, the poster child for “loving a music man ain't always what it's supposed to be.”
This guy has been married so many times he’s essentially Elizabeth Taylor with a Y-chromosome and more shapely feminine thighs.
If Neal and Amber can be headed on a one-way track to splitsville, (a woman who in just 2001 Neal proclaimed his eternal love for in Arrival’s liner notes), it means the toils of life on the road can splinter even the strongest of connubial vows.
Looking back on this past tour, (the approximate timeframe when the marriage hit the skids) you’ll most likely recall Neal personally adopted the color purple - the official color of the gay community.
Night after night Neal wore this tacky indigo-stained cheesecloth rag proudly, even in face of mass ridicule. Some speculated that he just had bad taste in clothes, but even still, night after night? Surely, there had to be some underlying motive to the madness. In light of the divorce, it all makes sense. I’ve uncovered the Rosetta stone, and baffled Journey fans worldwide need not scratch their heads any longer -
Neal has finally come to grips with the fact that while no faster fingers exist when it comes to guitar, when it comes to pussy, the man is strictly all thumbs.
While a purple shirt is not a confession of guilt unto itself, if Neal ever struts on stage in red leathers complete with lace up fly, you can consider me a Styx fan all the way.
P.S. I never hungered to experience hypothermia on my dick first-hand, so I don’t reside in the Minnesota area. But to those that are, do online Journey fandom a huge favor and check to see if there’s a rainbow bumper sticker firmly slapped against Schon’s hog. I think you may find the results surprising.
While it’s none of our business, it might as well be said; Neal Schon is leading the life of an unattached dick-swinging bachelor once again.
The question is, which way is his dick exactly swinging these days anyhow?
A quizzical forum overture to be sure, but if I may, allow me to first explain….
If Jon Cain’s dredged-in-marmalade sapfests ever needed vindication, look no further than to Neal Schon, the poster child for “loving a music man ain't always what it's supposed to be.”
This guy has been married so many times he’s essentially Elizabeth Taylor with a Y-chromosome and more shapely feminine thighs.
If Neal and Amber can be headed on a one-way track to splitsville, (a woman who in just 2001 Neal proclaimed his eternal love for in Arrival’s liner notes), it means the toils of life on the road can splinter even the strongest of connubial vows.
Looking back on this past tour, (the approximate timeframe when the marriage hit the skids) you’ll most likely recall Neal personally adopted the color purple - the official color of the gay community.
Night after night Neal wore this tacky indigo-stained cheesecloth rag proudly, even in face of mass ridicule. Some speculated that he just had bad taste in clothes, but even still, night after night? Surely, there had to be some underlying motive to the madness. In light of the divorce, it all makes sense. I’ve uncovered the Rosetta stone, and baffled Journey fans worldwide need not scratch their heads any longer -
Neal has finally come to grips with the fact that while no faster fingers exist when it comes to guitar, when it comes to pussy, the man is strictly all thumbs.
While a purple shirt is not a confession of guilt unto itself, if Neal ever struts on stage in red leathers complete with lace up fly, you can consider me a Styx fan all the way.
P.S. I never hungered to experience hypothermia on my dick first-hand, so I don’t reside in the Minnesota area. But to those that are, do online Journey fandom a huge favor and check to see if there’s a rainbow bumper sticker firmly slapped against Schon’s hog. I think you may find the results surprising.
