Euros and the great game of "Soccer"

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Euros and the great game of "Soccer"

Postby Saint John » Sat Apr 12, 2008 10:48 am

Bored out of my fucking mind I decided to watch a soccer match the other night. After falling asleep 3 times, picking my ass, scratching my nuts, and desperately trying to find a real sport, I watched the end of the match. Can one of you jackoffs that play this so called sport explain to me why there isn't a fucking clock? Toward the end, these pseudo males were running around in a paranoid frenzy because they sensed the match was about over. What kind of bullshit is that? I can't imagine baseball, football, Nascar or any other American sport having its participants "guess" when the fucking contest is over. I'm dying to hear an explanation to this obviously ignorant practice.

PS Having been to Greece 10 times and being of Greek heritage I went to a soccer match in Athens once. What a fucking horrifying experience. Aside from my nose hairs being burned off from the actually visible stench cloud, I had to duck steel bolts. That's right, 40,000 stinky fucks hurling objects at each other. Yay...fun. :roll: The match had 20,000 people on each side separated by 5,000 police officers. Seemed more like fucking animal tamers to me. Had they given me a running start I would have been all for dropping a "MOAB" on those smarmy, stinky fucks...several of whom were relatives.
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Re: Euros and the great game of "Soccer"

Postby RedWingFan » Sat Apr 12, 2008 11:10 am

Saint John wrote:Toward the end, these pseudo males were running around in a paranoid frenzy because they sensed the match was about over. What kind of bullshit is that?

I suppose you've never played the wonderful sport of "musical chairs" either huh? :lol:
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Re: Euros and the great game of "Soccer"

Postby Babyblue » Sat Apr 12, 2008 11:13 am

RedWingFan wrote:
Saint John wrote:Toward the end, these pseudo males were running around in a paranoid frenzy because they sensed the match was about over. What kind of bullshit is that?

I suppose you've never played the wonderful sport of "musical chairs" either huh? :lol:



:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
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Re: Euros and the great game of "Soccer"

Postby Saint John » Sat Apr 12, 2008 11:16 am

RedWingFan wrote:
Saint John wrote:Toward the end, these pseudo males were running around in a paranoid frenzy because they sensed the match was about over. What kind of bullshit is that?

I suppose you've never played the wonderful sport of "musical chairs" either huh? :lol:


BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA...but you can actually use your hands in musical chairs. At least I always did. :lol: :twisted: Seriously, musical chairs is exponentially more difficult than chasing a ball around for some arbitrary amount of time. These guys have the nerve to fall down and pretend that they're hurt....from what?!?! Sharpened blades of fucking grass???
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Postby Pstburp » Sat Apr 12, 2008 12:20 pm

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Play soccer is awesome
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Re: Euros and the great game of "Soccer"

Postby Enigma869 » Sat Apr 12, 2008 12:48 pm

Saint John wrote: Can one of you jackoffs that play this so called sport explain to me why there isn't a fucking clock? Toward the end, these pseudo males were running around in a paranoid frenzy because they sensed the match was about over. What kind of bullshit is that? I can't imagine baseball, football, Nascar or any other American sport having its participants "guess" when the fucking contest is over. I'm dying to hear an explanation to this obviously ignorant practice.




That about sums it up, SJ. This was the same exact comment I made in the other soccer thread! The fact that only the officials know how much time is left (and as I understand it, even the officials just abitrarily decide when the match is over) is FUCKING ABSURD! Just so I'm clear...Even if all of these dopey "officials" were wearing "Flava Flav's" clocks around their neck, it's still a boring, mindless game, and I still wouldn't be watching. The fact that none of the fans, or participants has any idea when the game ends, will NEVER make any sense to anyone with two brain cells connected :shock: :shock: :shock:


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Postby Vladan » Sat Apr 12, 2008 1:06 pm

I prefer Tennis out of any sports, Football next. Ice Hockey is a nice touch sport, but the rest are too slow paced for my liking.

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Postby Moon Beam » Sat Apr 12, 2008 1:07 pm

Two reasons why soccer may be sensible to some......

1. They hit balls off their heads, not play with ones attached to it.
2. Good men are never clocked.
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Re: Euros and the great game of "Soccer"

Postby Saint John » Sat Apr 12, 2008 1:10 pm

Enigma869 wrote:
Saint John wrote: Can one of you jackoffs that play this so called sport explain to me why there isn't a fucking clock? Toward the end, these pseudo males were running around in a paranoid frenzy because they sensed the match was about over. What kind of bullshit is that? I can't imagine baseball, football, Nascar or any other American sport having its participants "guess" when the fucking contest is over. I'm dying to hear an explanation to this obviously ignorant practice.




That about sums it up, SJ. This was the same exact comment I made in the other soccer thread! The fact that only the officials know how much time is left (and as I understand it, even the officials just abitrarily decide when the match is over) is FUCKING ABSURD! Just so I'm clear...Even if all of these dopey "officials" were wearing "Flava Flav's" clocks around their neck, it's still a boring, mindless game, and I still wouldn't be watching. The fact that none of the fans, or participants has any idea when the game ends, will NEVER make any sense to anyone with two brain cells connected :shock: :shock: :shock:


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Here's the thing, John. How can anyone find booting a ball around enthralling? Most logical, athletic men would rather run a "post route", try and hit a "deuce", or attempt a "one-timer", all of which require all of your body parts!!! To kick a fucking ball around for God only fucking knows how long seems ridiculous. Why have fucking arms? Add in the fans that attempt to kill the players and refs and you are left with a mindless, medieval dingleberry fest of smelly fucks from Europe, war torn African shit holes, South American Pablos and North American border jumpers. Yay!!! :roll:
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Postby Vladan » Sat Apr 12, 2008 1:12 pm

Well love it or hate, Football/Soccer is and will always continue to be the worlds most loved and popular sport. The world cup alone draws more viewers than the Olympics, the masses follow Soccer. Who knows why, it's just the way it always has been.
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Postby larryfromnextdoor » Sat Apr 12, 2008 1:20 pm

Moon Beam wrote:Two reasons why soccer may be sensible to some......

1. They hit balls off their heads, not play with ones attached to it.
2. Good men are never clocked.


:lol: :lol:

BAMM!!!!

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Postby larryfromnextdoor » Sat Apr 12, 2008 1:23 pm

why does everyone want to take their shirt off at the end??? :shock:

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Postby Enigma869 » Sat Apr 12, 2008 1:24 pm

Vladan wrote:Well love it or hate, Football/Soccer is and will always continue to be the worlds most loved and popular sport. The world cup alone draws more viewers than the Olympics, the masses follow Soccer. Who knows why, it's just the way it always has been.



I think you're 100% correct, Vladan. "The masses", excluding the U.S. will always have a hard-on for soccer, and I'm okay with it. I don't get the game and never will. The only real problem I've ever had with soccer are foreigners trying to tell me why I should love it so much! As I've said before...We don't get it...We never have...We never will, and we're pretty okay with not giving a shit about soccer! We have enough American sports in our country that we never have to give a shit about soccer!

I moved to North Carolina a year ago (thank god I'm moving back home soon), and everyone down here tells me why I need to get excited about a bunch of red-neck jackoffs driving around in a circle for hundreds of miles. I tell them the same thing I tell my soccer friends...Go fuck yourself :shock:

Boston is one of the greatest sports towns in America, but we don't "preach" to anyone that they should like our sports or our teams. If you like them, great. If you don't that's okay too. Even my hometown manages to support a soccer team, which I'll never understand. I guess any city with enough immigrants will always have a soccer following. In the interest of shutting up the yahoo "racist" claims, "immigrant" isn't a derogatory term!


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Postby Saint John » Sat Apr 12, 2008 1:27 pm

Vladan wrote:Well love it or hate, Football/Soccer is and will always continue to be the worlds most loved and popular sport. The world cup alone draws more viewers than the Olympics, the masses follow Soccer. Who knows why, it's just the way it always has been.


The only reason it's "the worlds most loved and popular sport" is because you only need a ball to play it!!! This works out very well in Iran, Iraq, Colombia, and Europe...a place where deodorant is a fucking commodity!!! It's (soccer) affordable, dude. Nothing more. Quit confusing quantity with quality.
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Postby Andrew » Sat Apr 12, 2008 1:41 pm

Saint John wrote:
Vladan wrote:Well love it or hate, Football/Soccer is and will always continue to be the worlds most loved and popular sport. The world cup alone draws more viewers than the Olympics, the masses follow Soccer. Who knows why, it's just the way it always has been.


The only reason it's "the worlds most loved and popular sport" is because you only need a ball to play it!!! This works out very well in Iran, Iraq, Colombia, and Europe...a place where deodorant is a fucking commodity!!! It's (soccer) affordable, dude. Nothing more. Quit confusing quantity with quality.


Ease up.
I just got back from taking my boy to his first game of the year. Good sport and just because the USA doesn't have the attention span long enough to appreciate it, doesn't mean the rest of the world is wrong.

Then there is cricket - my beloved sport - our games go 5 days and you lot complain when a baseball game runs over 3 hours!!!
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Postby Lula » Sat Apr 12, 2008 1:45 pm

Andrew wrote:
Then there is cricket - my beloved sport - our games go 5 days and you lot complain when a baseball game runs over 3 hours!!!


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Postby Saint John » Sat Apr 12, 2008 1:58 pm

Andrew wrote:Then there is cricket - my beloved sport


Well this obviously explains the infatuation with shit bands like "Danger Danger" and fucking "House Of Lords." And keep your son away from soccer. I've seen you Drew and I think you've also posted Mrs. Wombat. Dude, you're good. Have the little wombats play baseball or even hockey (can't believe I said that :lol: ).
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Postby Andrew » Sat Apr 12, 2008 2:14 pm

House Of Lords have one of the best albums this year....and I'm sure Danger Danger will join them. Glad you recognize great music.
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Postby larryfromnextdoor » Sat Apr 12, 2008 2:43 pm

Andrew wrote:House Of Lords have one of the best albums this year....and I'm sure Danger Danger will join them. Glad you recognize great music.


HOUSE OF LORDS and UGLY KID JOE posters in Seinfeld.... :wink: everything goes back to Seinfeld.. :shock:

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Postby Saint John » Sat Apr 12, 2008 3:05 pm

Larry, how IN THE FUCK could you have known that?!?!?!?! :shock:
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Postby larryfromnextdoor » Sat Apr 12, 2008 3:07 pm

Saint John wrote:Larry, how IN THE FUCK could you have known that?!?!?!?! :shock:


dude!! ive been sitting on that one for a year waiting for a reference..!!! :lol: :lol: BAMMM!! :wink:
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Postby WykkedSensation » Sat Apr 12, 2008 6:32 pm

Smelly Euro fuck here....
You have to be fit, extremely fit to play football (its not fucking soccer, its football). Why is it that the whole world knows the game as 'football', but one single country on the planet calls it soccer. Its called football because you use your feet, you dumasses.
2 Reasons why the good ol' USofA can't figure the game out is...
1...You have to have more than one brain cell to understand it.
2...You have to be fit. Something which most sport fans in the US are totally lacking due to eating 50,000 fuckin donuts each and every day.

:wink: :lol:
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Postby SusieP » Sat Apr 12, 2008 7:49 pm

I hate soccer. Bores me rigid. Well the British teams bore me anyway. They just seem to turn up to work and hang about on the pitch until the whistle goes. Whilst trying to calculate how many thousand pounds a second they have just been paid.
Although it can be quite entertaining listening to them being interviewed after the games. A lot of them aren't so bright. But it's naughty to laugh at them, I know.

St John, I think you would prefer to watch rugby. It is much more fun to watch. Well, in my opinion anyway. And they do run with the ball in their hands like American football.

And FYI, I shower every day and always use deodorant. Nor do I have Tina Turner wigs under my armpits.
I have a dental plan, too.
:lol: :lol:

I may not be as tall as you but I could kick your knees with my pointy boot, you cheeky bugger.
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Postby styxman » Sat Apr 12, 2008 8:40 pm

Let's put this baby to bed, once and for all :roll:

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

All types of sports are popular globally, but what sports can we call THE most popular in the world? Some of the answers may surprise you.

It's no surprise that football, or what Americans call "soccer" is the world's most popular sport to play and to watch. An estimated 3.5 billion people either watch or play football. The World Cup is the global championship of the sport and this tournament is played every four years. The World Cup itself is one of the highest rated sports on television, with many countries tuning in en masse to watch their country's team play. Football is popular in all of the UK, Europe, Asia as well as South America. However, with so many other sports being popular, the Unites States still lags behind in their interest in "soccer".

Next, we have cricket. This sport which consists of a bat and a ball, has been around for hundreds of years and originated in England. The sport is popular in the UK, Australia, New Zealand, some African countries, some Caribbean countries and it is the most popular sport in the countries of India and Pakistan. An estimated 3 billion people watch or play cricket each year.

The next most popular sport is a sure surprise, and that is field hockey, with an estimated 2 billion players or watchers, mostly in Asian countries, European countries, Australia and around Africa. This sport tends to be played in high schools in the United States, usually by girls only.

Coming up next is tennis. Not so surprising, but there are an estimated 1 billion players and watchers of tennis around the world. Tennis tends to be popular in richer countries, including the United States, Asian countries, Australia and Europe. There are four main tournaments in tennis, called "Grand Slams" at which players from many countries play. The first is the Australian Open, then the French Open, Wimbledon and then the US Open in late August. The Grand Slam tournaments tend to get the most attention during the tennis season.

Next we have volleyball. Yet another surprise, with an estimated 900 million viewers or players around the world. Volleyball is popular in the United States, where the sport originated, as well as in Brazil, all over Europe, Russia, China and Japan. Volleyball is a popular high school sport in many countries due to it's team centered play and lack of specialized equipment requirements.

Also popular is table tennis, otherwise known as Ping Pong. This is another surprisingly popular sport around the world, with an estimated 900 million watchers or players. Table tennis originated in England as an after dinner activity for Victorians in the late 19th century. Table tennis as a competitive sport is popular in many countries but is especially popular in China, Korea and Singapore.

After these sports, we have a triumvirate of more mainstream American sports including baseball, golf, American football and basketball, with each sport attracting between 400 and 500 million players or watchers worldwide.

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Holding up the rear, the main sports of The US of A.

Oh, and one last thing, in Soccer we don't stop for commercials, we run like Cambodians after the only chicken in the village, non stop for 45mins, break for 15mins and then run again for another 45mins. The Manager(Coach) is only 5 paces at anyone time from a player on the pitch, guess what Saint, he can shout, 5mins left lads, who the fuck needs a clock for that :roll:
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Postby Enigma869 » Sat Apr 12, 2008 9:15 pm

Andrew wrote:Then there is cricket - my beloved sport - our games go 5 days



Holy fuck! Five days????? How the hell can someone pay attention to the same game for 5 days :shock: :shock: :shock:


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Postby SusieP » Sat Apr 12, 2008 9:26 pm

Enigma869 wrote:
Andrew wrote:Then there is cricket - my beloved sport - our games go 5 days



Holy fuck! Five days????? How the hell can someone pay attention to the same game for 5 days :shock: :shock: :shock:


John from Boston


Same as you guys manage to pay attention to American Idol for weeks and weeks and weeks. :lol:
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Postby Saint John » Sat Apr 12, 2008 10:01 pm

WykkedSensation wrote:Smelly Euro fuck here....
You have to be fit, extremely fit to play football (its not fucking soccer, its football). Why is it that the whole world knows the game as 'football', but one single country on the planet calls it soccer. Its called football because you use your feet, you dumasses.
2 Reasons why the good ol' USofA can't figure the game out is...
1...You have to have more than one brain cell to understand it.
2...You have to be fit. Something which most sport fans in the US are totally lacking due to eating 50,000 fuckin donuts each and every day.

:wink: :lol:


LOL...loving this post. Finally, someone with some fire checked in. That's the good news...now for the bad news. Yeah, you have to be in shape to play soccer...big deal. It's so redundant and one-dimensional it's ridiculous. Kick ball...kick ball again...and the goalies??? What do they get...2 or 3 shots a game at them??? Shit, I'd be fucking sleeping by the time I got a shot on goal. Soccer is a mutated form of running where some medieval retard decided to add a ball. Fucker obviously had no arms, either.


As for Styxman...You have got to be fist-fucking me, dude. "Table tennis???" You consider ping pong a fucking "sport???" What's next in your argument...horseshoes??? Perhaps Bocce Ball??? You guys can keep riveting activities like soccer, ping pong and cricket. Enjoy, man. Ping pong...lol. :lol:

And what's this "5 days" bullshit with cricket??? I'd venture to bet that the same clothes are worn for said 5 days...unwashed. Man, at the end of that week I'd bet those uniforms are like armor...so fucking hard that an arrow would bounce off.
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Postby SusieP » Sat Apr 12, 2008 10:23 pm

Saint John wrote:
WykkedSensation wrote:Smelly Euro fuck here....
You have to be fit, extremely fit to play football (its not fucking soccer, its football). Why is it that the whole world knows the game as 'football', but one single country on the planet calls it soccer. Its called football because you use your feet, you dumasses.
2 Reasons why the good ol' USofA can't figure the game out is...
1...You have to have more than one brain cell to understand it.
2...You have to be fit. Something which most sport fans in the US are totally lacking due to eating 50,000 fuckin donuts each and every day.

:wink: :lol:


LOL...loving this post. Finally, someone with some fire checked in. That's the good news...now for the bad news. Yeah, you have to be in shape to play soccer...big deal. It's so redundant and one-dimensional it's ridiculous. Kick ball...kick ball again...and the goalies??? What do they get...2 or 3 shots a game at them??? Shit, I'd be fucking sleeping by the time I got a shot on goal. Soccer is a mutated form of running where some medieval retard decided to add a ball. Fucker obviously had no arms, either.


As for Styxman...You have got to be fist-fucking me, dude. "Table tennis???" You consider ping pong a fucking "sport???" What's next in your argument...horseshoes??? Perhaps Bocce Ball??? You guys can keep riveting activities like soccer, ping pong and cricket. Enjoy, man. Ping pong...lol. :lol:

And what's this "5 days" bullshit with cricket??? I'd venture to bet that the same clothes are worn for said 5 days...unwashed. Man, at the end of that week I'd bet those uniforms are like armor...so fucking hard that an arrow would bounce off.




Somebody hold him down while I kick his knees. Lets see my pointy boot bounce off his knee caps.

Or better still lets hide his beer stash. :lol:
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Postby Rick » Sat Apr 12, 2008 10:29 pm

SusieP wrote:
Saint John wrote:
WykkedSensation wrote:Smelly Euro fuck here....
You have to be fit, extremely fit to play football (its not fucking soccer, its football). Why is it that the whole world knows the game as 'football', but one single country on the planet calls it soccer. Its called football because you use your feet, you dumasses.
2 Reasons why the good ol' USofA can't figure the game out is...
1...You have to have more than one brain cell to understand it.
2...You have to be fit. Something which most sport fans in the US are totally lacking due to eating 50,000 fuckin donuts each and every day.

:wink: :lol:


LOL...loving this post. Finally, someone with some fire checked in. That's the good news...now for the bad news. Yeah, you have to be in shape to play soccer...big deal. It's so redundant and one-dimensional it's ridiculous. Kick ball...kick ball again...and the goalies??? What do they get...2 or 3 shots a game at them??? Shit, I'd be fucking sleeping by the time I got a shot on goal. Soccer is a mutated form of running where some medieval retard decided to add a ball. Fucker obviously had no arms, either.


As for Styxman...You have got to be fist-fucking me, dude. "Table tennis???" You consider ping pong a fucking "sport???" What's next in your argument...horseshoes??? Perhaps Bocce Ball??? You guys can keep riveting activities like soccer, ping pong and cricket. Enjoy, man. Ping pong...lol. :lol:

And what's this "5 days" bullshit with cricket??? I'd venture to bet that the same clothes are worn for said 5 days...unwashed. Man, at the end of that week I'd bet those uniforms are like armor...so fucking hard that an arrow would bounce off.




Somebody hold him down while I kick his knees. Lets see my pointy boot bounce off his knee caps.

Or better still lets hide his beer stash. :lol:


You really know how to hit a man below the belt. :lol:
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Postby SusieP » Sat Apr 12, 2008 10:30 pm

Rick wrote:
SusieP wrote:
Saint John wrote:
WykkedSensation wrote:Smelly Euro fuck here....
You have to be fit, extremely fit to play football (its not fucking soccer, its football). Why is it that the whole world knows the game as 'football', but one single country on the planet calls it soccer. Its called football because you use your feet, you dumasses.
2 Reasons why the good ol' USofA can't figure the game out is...
1...You have to have more than one brain cell to understand it.
2...You have to be fit. Something which most sport fans in the US are totally lacking due to eating 50,000 fuckin donuts each and every day.

:wink: :lol:


LOL...loving this post. Finally, someone with some fire checked in. That's the good news...now for the bad news. Yeah, you have to be in shape to play soccer...big deal. It's so redundant and one-dimensional it's ridiculous. Kick ball...kick ball again...and the goalies??? What do they get...2 or 3 shots a game at them??? Shit, I'd be fucking sleeping by the time I got a shot on goal. Soccer is a mutated form of running where some medieval retard decided to add a ball. Fucker obviously had no arms, either.


As for Styxman...You have got to be fist-fucking me, dude. "Table tennis???" You consider ping pong a fucking "sport???" What's next in your argument...horseshoes??? Perhaps Bocce Ball??? You guys can keep riveting activities like soccer, ping pong and cricket. Enjoy, man. Ping pong...lol. :lol:

And what's this "5 days" bullshit with cricket??? I'd venture to bet that the same clothes are worn for said 5 days...unwashed. Man, at the end of that week I'd bet those uniforms are like armor...so fucking hard that an arrow would bounce off.




Somebody hold him down while I kick his knees. Lets see my pointy boot bounce off his knee caps.

Or better still lets hide his beer stash. :lol:


You really know how to hit a man below the belt. :lol:



I said HIDE it, not DRINK it. :lol:
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