New Jersey Millionaire Buys first 3 Rows for all Shows

by **WIX** » Mon Jul 25, 2011 5:49 am

Sorry folks a New Jersey Millionaire has been reported as buying out all of the first three rows for the rest of the tour. He is the owner of 95 Rest Homes for Senior Citizens and plans on filling the seats with Senior Citizens at each concert.

He did assure at the Venues he will have attendants there to change diapers between sets. Because as we all know loud noises can cause poopy pants and frequent urination.

He did also assure that if the loudness of speakers causes any heart failure he will have a sheet thrown on Senior Citizen and not remove them until the show is over. To avoid any disturbance of show.

Bad news is ILAA is now rows 4 through 6. A spokesperson for ILAA said. "Hey, were all gonna be there one day, this is a good thing for the old folks!"

This was reported on The Concert Series Network of Webjunkie.comz/music

by **Liquid_Drummer** » Mon Jul 25, 2011 6:01 am

I can only imagine Neal making guitar faces at old ladies !! Hahah ! Everyone on stage looking at each other like, uh, who shit ? If this is true it is going to be an odd thing for the band to see from stage show after show.. Oh man..

by **Maui Tom** » Mon Jul 25, 2011 6:13 am

Wix didn't get out of Utah in time...he has Ute Syndrome 12....he's gonna be even more out there than usual for awhile...should calm down midweek....

by **WIX** » Mon Jul 25, 2011 8:34 am

Funny sideline to this story is he was the founder of "Soakers" which later became "Depends Corp".

by **Jubilee** » Mon Jul 25, 2011 11:15 am

Dear gawd! THE BOOBAGE! THE BOOOOOBAGE!

by **tater1977** » Mon Jul 25, 2011 12:48 pm

Jubilee wrote::shock:

Dear gawd! THE BOOBAGE! THE BOOOOOBAGE!

MR

New Jersey Millionaire Buys first 3 Rows for all Shows

New Jersey Millionaire Buys first 3 Rows for all Shows

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