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HAVE A GREAT SAT AND SUN!!!!

PostPosted: Sun Apr 26, 2009 5:45 am
by MBPL
Still writing, although, frustrated with writer's block at the moment...an unimaginable death, to be sure!

I do try to LURK as you all call it and I have found some interesting stuff, but there are so many posts, yikes! I am sure I will get on board again soon. I hope you all are doing well and braving the economic thingy. Me? Well, my paycheck stays the same, rent went up again, BLAH, BLAH, BLAH...Ain't complainin', not at all!

Oh, I got crushes on a couple guys, gosh it's been awhile since I had crushes, what am I, 14?

Please everyone have a great Sat and Sun, and whatever you do enjoy yourselves to the max. And, laugh, remember laughter is a good thing, and laugh at yourself, for God's sake! Give yourself credit, but look hard at yourself and giggle at the great achievement that was created by two people (your parents) who wanted to look at an extension of themselves. Or, perhaps you were brought into this world because…

Two drunks forgot to use condoms. OR,
A woman got knocked up by a man she thought loved her, he didn't and left (my folks). OR,
A married couple thought having you would mend their rocky relationship. OR,
A gay couple asked their best friend to help them out. OR,
You were left in a dumpster by your teen mother. OR,
A spaceship from Venus dropped you in a field where you were raised by bush baboons who escaped by cargo boat from a poor African country. OR,
You are a science project. OR,

Your birth situation here: ________________________________________________ :wink:

ENJOY!!!! MBPL

Re: HAVE A GREAT SAT AND SUN!!!!

PostPosted: Sun Apr 26, 2009 11:20 am
by Carla777
MBPL wrote:Still writing, although, frustrated with writer's block at the moment...an unimaginable death, to be sure!

I do try to LURK as you all call it and I have found some interesting stuff, but there are so many posts, yikes! I am sure I will get on board again soon. I hope you all are doing well and braving the economic thingy. Me? Well, my paycheck stays the same, rent went up again, BLAH, BLAH, BLAH...Ain't complainin', not at all!

Oh, I got crushes on a couple guys, gosh it's been awhile since I had crushes, what am I, 14?

Please everyone have a great Sat and Sun, and whatever you do enjoy yourselves to the max. And, laugh, remember laughter is a good thing, and laugh at yourself, for God's sake! Give yourself credit, but look hard at yourself and giggle at the great achievement that was created by two people (your parents) who wanted to look at an extension of themselves. Or, perhaps you were brought into this world because…

Two drunks forgot to use condoms. OR,
A woman got knocked up by a man she thought loved her, he didn't and left (my folks). OR,
A married couple thought having you would mend their rocky relationship. OR,
A gay couple asked their best friend to help them out. OR,
You were left in a dumpster by your teen mother. OR,
A spaceship from Venus dropped you in a field where you were raised by bush baboons who escaped by cargo boat from a poor African country. OR,
You are a science project. OR,

Your birth situation here: A couple rush the marriadge because a big oops! (that's me) :wink:
btw i would love that the 6 option will be my birth situation, sound like a great adventure at least

ENJOY!!!! MBPL


:lol: :lol: Your a funny kind lady..have a great sat and sunday for you too chica!!

Re: HAVE A GREAT SAT AND SUN!!!!

PostPosted: Sun Apr 26, 2009 11:25 am
by bluejeangirl76
MBPL wrote:You were left in a dumpster by your teen mother.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kRj-S8Aklcw

Image




Your birth situation here: ________________________________________________ :wink:




I was a missed pill. :lol: :shock:

Re: HAVE A GREAT SAT AND SUN!!!!

PostPosted: Sun Apr 26, 2009 11:30 am
by Melissa
bluejeangirl76 wrote:
MBPL wrote:You were left in a dumpster by your teen mother.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kRj-S8Aklcw

Image




Your birth situation here: ________________________________________________ :wink:




I was a missed pill. :lol: :shock:


:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

I was apparently planned :lol: but my good story is that my mother got appendicitis while pregnant with me at about 33 weeks, she had surgery and her OB had to be in the OR with the other surgeon, just in case, lol. But I waited another month before making my appearance, and STILL weighed 8# 10 oz. even being a little early :lol:

PostPosted: Sun Apr 26, 2009 11:40 am
by KenTheDude
I've had a shitty weekend so far with one more day to go. I'm building the fence from hell. Neighbor had to work Friday so I tore down the old fence myself. Drilled the new holes myself as well. Almost got all the holes drilled when the auger bit got caught deep in a hole and couldn't pull it back out. Took 2 1/2 hours getting it out. Since I lost those 2 1/2 hours, I wasn't able to set all of the posts in concrete. Well naturally it had to rain like a motherfucker last night (with no rain in the forecast.) All of the remaining holes filled up with water so my neighbor and I spent all morning using a cup to scoop out the water. Finally got all of the posts set and letting them dry overnight so I can frame it up tomorrow.

Also, I stepped on a nail and it came through my toe and bled like a slaughtered pig. On top of that, a post fell over and sheared the electrical cable out of my A/C unit. So I spent 1 1/2 hours wiring up my A/C compressor. Plus, the rope that pull-starts the auger drill broke so I had to run down to the hardware store and get a new rope and take the auger drill apart to restring it.

I'm super-sunburned. Got all kinds of cuts, scrapes, bruises, blisters and sore muscles. Wonder what I have waiting for me tomorrow? :lol:

PostPosted: Sun Apr 26, 2009 11:48 am
by DrFU
KenTheDude wrote:I've had a shitty weekend so far with one more day to go. I'm building the fence from hell. Neighbor had to work Friday so I tore down the old fence myself. Drilled the new holes myself as well. Almost got all the holes drilled when the auger bit got caught deep in a hole and couldn't pull it back out. Took 2 1/2 hours getting it out. Since I lost those 2 1/2 hours, I wasn't able to set all of the posts in concrete. Well naturally it had to rain like a motherfucker last night (with no rain in the forecast.) All of the remaining holes filled up with water so my neighbor and I spent all morning using a cup to scoop out the water. Finally got all of the posts set and letting them dry overnight so I can frame it up tomorrow.

Also, I stepped on a nail and it came through my toe and bled like a slaughtered pig. On top of that, a post fell over and sheared the electrical cable out of my A/C unit. So I spent 1 1/2 hours wiring up my A/C compressor. Plus, the rope that pull-starts the auger drill broke so I had to run down to the hardware store and get a new rope and take the auger drill apart to restring it.

I'm super-sunburned. Got all kinds of cuts, scrapes, bruises, blisters and sore muscles. Wonder what I have waiting for me tomorrow? :lol:


a tetanus shot?

PostPosted: Sun Apr 26, 2009 11:51 am
by JH'sTXfan
KenTheDude wrote:I've had a shitty weekend so far with one more day to go. I'm building the fence from hell. Neighbor had to work Friday so I tore down the old fence myself. Drilled the new holes myself as well. Almost got all the holes drilled when the auger bit got caught deep in a hole and couldn't pull it back out. Took 2 1/2 hours getting it out. Since I lost those 2 1/2 hours, I wasn't able to set all of the posts in concrete. Well naturally it had to rain like a motherfucker last night (with no rain in the forecast.) All of the remaining holes filled up with water so my neighbor and I spent all morning using a cup to scoop out the water. Finally got all of the posts set and letting them dry overnight so I can frame it up tomorrow.

Also, I stepped on a nail and it came through my toe and bled like a slaughtered pig. On top of that, a post fell over and sheared the electrical cable out of my A/C unit. So I spent 1 1/2 hours wiring up my A/C compressor. Plus, the rope that pull-starts the auger drill broke so I had to run down to the hardware store and get a new rope and take the auger drill apart to restring it.

I'm super-sunburned. Got all kinds of cuts, scrapes, bruises, blisters and sore muscles. Wonder what I have waiting for me tomorrow? :lol:


You'll know you have arrived when they name an ER room after you. :lol:

Image

PostPosted: Sun Apr 26, 2009 11:53 am
by KenTheDude
DrFU wrote:
KenTheDude wrote:I've had a shitty weekend so far with one more day to go. I'm building the fence from hell. Neighbor had to work Friday so I tore down the old fence myself. Drilled the new holes myself as well. Almost got all the holes drilled when the auger bit got caught deep in a hole and couldn't pull it back out. Took 2 1/2 hours getting it out. Since I lost those 2 1/2 hours, I wasn't able to set all of the posts in concrete. Well naturally it had to rain like a motherfucker last night (with no rain in the forecast.) All of the remaining holes filled up with water so my neighbor and I spent all morning using a cup to scoop out the water. Finally got all of the posts set and letting them dry overnight so I can frame it up tomorrow.

Also, I stepped on a nail and it came through my toe and bled like a slaughtered pig. On top of that, a post fell over and sheared the electrical cable out of my A/C unit. So I spent 1 1/2 hours wiring up my A/C compressor. Plus, the rope that pull-starts the auger drill broke so I had to run down to the hardware store and get a new rope and take the auger drill apart to restring it.

I'm super-sunburned. Got all kinds of cuts, scrapes, bruises, blisters and sore muscles. Wonder what I have waiting for me tomorrow? :lol:


a tetanus shot?


Tetanus shots are for pussies. Just pour gasoline over the wound to kill all the germs and you're good to go. :lol: :P

PostPosted: Sun Apr 26, 2009 12:39 pm
by Rick
KenTheDude wrote:
DrFU wrote:
KenTheDude wrote:I've had a shitty weekend so far with one more day to go. I'm building the fence from hell. Neighbor had to work Friday so I tore down the old fence myself. Drilled the new holes myself as well. Almost got all the holes drilled when the auger bit got caught deep in a hole and couldn't pull it back out. Took 2 1/2 hours getting it out. Since I lost those 2 1/2 hours, I wasn't able to set all of the posts in concrete. Well naturally it had to rain like a motherfucker last night (with no rain in the forecast.) All of the remaining holes filled up with water so my neighbor and I spent all morning using a cup to scoop out the water. Finally got all of the posts set and letting them dry overnight so I can frame it up tomorrow.

Also, I stepped on a nail and it came through my toe and bled like a slaughtered pig. On top of that, a post fell over and sheared the electrical cable out of my A/C unit. So I spent 1 1/2 hours wiring up my A/C compressor. Plus, the rope that pull-starts the auger drill broke so I had to run down to the hardware store and get a new rope and take the auger drill apart to restring it.

I'm super-sunburned. Got all kinds of cuts, scrapes, bruises, blisters and sore muscles. Wonder what I have waiting for me tomorrow? :lol:


a tetanus shot?


Tetanus shots are for pussies. Just pour gasoline over the wound to kill all the germs and you're good to go. :lol: :P


Oh man. I feel your pain Ken. I used to go through that shit. Apartment life is bliss, once you get used to hearing the upstairs neighbor taking a piss at 2:30 am. :lol: I haven't had to dig a post hole in ages though. I was a post hole digging motherfucker at one time.

Texas weather will keep you busy.

OH MY!!!

PostPosted: Sun Apr 26, 2009 12:55 pm
by MBPL
KenTheDude wrote:I've had a shitty weekend so far with one more day to go. I'm building the fence from hell. Neighbor had to work Friday so I tore down the old fence myself. Drilled the new holes myself as well. Almost got all the holes drilled when the auger bit got caught deep in a hole and couldn't pull it back out. Took 2 1/2 hours getting it out. Since I lost those 2 1/2 hours, I wasn't able to set all of the posts in concrete. Well naturally it had to rain like a motherfucker last night (with no rain in the forecast.) All of the remaining holes filled up with water so my neighbor and I spent all morning using a cup to scoop out the water. Finally got all of the posts set and letting them dry overnight so I can frame it up tomorrow.

Also, I stepped on a nail and it came through my toe and bled like a slaughtered pig. On top of that, a post fell over and sheared the electrical cable out of my A/C unit. So I spent 1 1/2 hours wiring up my A/C compressor. Plus, the rope that pull-starts the auger drill broke so I had to run down to the hardware store and get a new rope and take the auger drill apart to restring it.

I'm super-sunburned. Got all kinds of cuts, scrapes, bruises, blisters and sore muscles. Wonder what I have waiting for me tomorrow? :lol:



I was in the middle of coloring my graying-ass hair when I came upon this post and good lord, man! Your situation sounds a lot like my life…well, without the sunburn and fence building! The best I can tell you is keep your head up, keep the faith, don’t take it personal, be strong. Or, I can counter your trivial, pathetic little issues with a bit about MY life, hmm? Here we go…

Woke up Friday with the boy cats’ left paw in my eye. The girl cat, who also shares my queen-size bed, woke up and wanted to be petted so she, of course, licked my right eyelid which, for you men, feels like scraping steel wool across your balls, basically.

My younger brother refuses to continue to help me pay for our mother’s incidentals, although he still helps pay half her rent. That means my 50th b-day this year may be a bust.

My crotch is beginning to look like the top of an older black man’s nappy salt and pepper comb-over. It’s probably time for me to break down and go “Brazilian.”

I got my mama’s big-ass boobies. When I lay on my back my tits spill into my armpits looking like two black bald babies in a headlock.

I got my mamma’s bunions which, when they flare up and I wear sandals, looks like I’ve got lopsided rocks for toes.

My hair is thinning.

I truly cannot see without my reading glasses. I have to stop and put them on no matter where I am…restaurant, grocery store, work…sucks.

I am hearing impaired, and every few sentences I end up saying, “you said what?” Even with my hearing aids! Once I flushed a hearing aid, the one that fits into the ear, down the toilet at work! True story.

I am Cognitively dyslexic and refuse to drive cause I don’t know how to read the damned signs and I can’t always tell left from right.

I don’t mind the way I look, but for once I would love to take a picture and not be grossed out.

Okay, so that’s about it for now. Hope I gave you some hope and perhaps made you laugh a little. On a serious note: storms and nails in your toe and such…STAY STRONG AND GATHER COURAGE WHERE YOU CAN, my dear. And good luck. :)

PostPosted: Sun Apr 26, 2009 1:04 pm
by tammy
Mocha & Ken, at least you guys can laugh about it all and write some funny shtuff!

Re: OH MY!!!

PostPosted: Sun Apr 26, 2009 1:43 pm
by StoneCold
MBPL wrote:My crotch is beginning to look like the top of an older black man’s nappy salt and pepper comb-over. It’s probably time for me to break down and go “Brazilian.”

I got my mama’s big-ass boobies. When I lay on my back my tits spill into my armpits looking like two black bald babies in a headlock.

I am hearing impaired, and every few sentences I end up saying, “you said what?” Even with my hearing aids! Once I flushed a hearing aid, the one that fits into the ear, down the toilet at work! True story.



MBPL, tell us your creativity's not going to waste just here on MR. You should be writing comedy for somebody, a show or standup. The headlock baby joke was hilarious. :lol:

And options for "choose how/why you were conceived"? :shock: :) Wow, that was impressive. You should move beyond beaky peartree books and start getting published.

Too bad Whoopie doesn't read MR, I think she'd hire you in an instant. If that's something you might want to pursue, we can shoot some emails over to the view. Hey, youtube worked for Pineda.

PostPosted: Sun Apr 26, 2009 2:02 pm
by Peartree12249
DrFU wrote:
KenTheDude wrote:I've had a shitty weekend so far with one more day to go. I'm building the fence from hell. Neighbor had to work Friday so I tore down the old fence myself. Drilled the new holes myself as well. Almost got all the holes drilled when the auger bit got caught deep in a hole and couldn't pull it back out. Took 2 1/2 hours getting it out. Since I lost those 2 1/2 hours, I wasn't able to set all of the posts in concrete. Well naturally it had to rain like a motherfucker last night (with no rain in the forecast.) All of the remaining holes filled up with water so my neighbor and I spent all morning using a cup to scoop out the water. Finally got all of the posts set and letting them dry overnight so I can frame it up tomorrow.

Also, I stepped on a nail and it came through my toe and bled like a slaughtered pig. On top of that, a post fell over and sheared the electrical cable out of my A/C unit. So I spent 1 1/2 hours wiring up my A/C compressor. Plus, the rope that pull-starts the auger drill broke so I had to run down to the hardware store and get a new rope and take the auger drill apart to restring it.

I'm super-sunburned. Got all kinds of cuts, scrapes, bruises, blisters and sore muscles. Wonder what I have waiting for me tomorrow? :lol:


a tetanus shot?


+1 Seriously if you haven't had one lately, you really should go to urgent care and get one.

Re: OH MY!!!

PostPosted: Sun Apr 26, 2009 2:37 pm
by Shadowsong
MBPL wrote:
KenTheDude wrote:I've had a shitty weekend so far with one more day to go. I'm building the fence from hell. Neighbor had to work Friday so I tore down the old fence myself. Drilled the new holes myself as well. Almost got all the holes drilled when the auger bit got caught deep in a hole and couldn't pull it back out. Took 2 1/2 hours getting it out. Since I lost those 2 1/2 hours, I wasn't able to set all of the posts in concrete. Well naturally it had to rain like a motherfucker last night (with no rain in the forecast.) All of the remaining holes filled up with water so my neighbor and I spent all morning using a cup to scoop out the water. Finally got all of the posts set and letting them dry overnight so I can frame it up tomorrow.

Also, I stepped on a nail and it came through my toe and bled like a slaughtered pig. On top of that, a post fell over and sheared the electrical cable out of my A/C unit. So I spent 1 1/2 hours wiring up my A/C compressor. Plus, the rope that pull-starts the auger drill broke so I had to run down to the hardware store and get a new rope and take the auger drill apart to restring it.

I'm super-sunburned. Got all kinds of cuts, scrapes, bruises, blisters and sore muscles. Wonder what I have waiting for me tomorrow? :lol:



I was in the middle of coloring my graying-ass hair when I came upon this post and good lord, man! Your situation sounds a lot like my life…well, without the sunburn and fence building! The best I can tell you is keep your head up, keep the faith, don’t take it personal, be strong. Or, I can counter your trivial, pathetic little issues with a bit about MY life, hmm? Here we go…

Woke up Friday with the boy cats’ left paw in my eye. The girl cat, who also shares my queen-size bed, woke up and wanted to be petted so she, of course, licked my right eyelid which, for you men, feels like scraping steel wool across your balls, basically.

My younger brother refuses to continue to help me pay for our mother’s incidentals, although he still helps pay half her rent. That means my 50th b-day this year may be a bust.

My crotch is beginning to look like the top of an older black man’s nappy salt and pepper comb-over. It’s probably time for me to break down and go “Brazilian.”

I got my mama’s big-ass boobies. When I lay on my back my tits spill into my armpits looking like two black bald babies in a headlock.

I got my mamma’s bunions which, when they flare up and I wear sandals, looks like I’ve got lopsided rocks for toes.

My hair is thinning.

I truly cannot see without my reading glasses. I have to stop and put them on no matter where I am…restaurant, grocery store, work…sucks.

I am hearing impaired, and every few sentences I end up saying, “you said what?” Even with my hearing aids! Once I flushed a hearing aid, the one that fits into the ear, down the toilet at work! True story.

I am Cognitively dyslexic and refuse to drive cause I don’t know how to read the damned signs and I can’t always tell left from right.

I don’t mind the way I look, but for once I would love to take a picture and not be grossed out.

Okay, so that’s about it for now. Hope I gave you some hope and perhaps made you laugh a little. On a serious note: storms and nails in your toe and such…STAY STRONG AND GATHER COURAGE WHERE YOU CAN, my dear. And good luck. :)


LMAO
Hey
My crotch is fine
My feet are smooth as a baby's bottom
Please don't remind us of what we have to look foward to...

As for my hair (on my head) I have always had enuff for 2 people
Shit, raise your sword to my head & you'll dull your blade
My head is a rock...
Saved me from many a fall!


Hey, you looked cute in Trev's armlock!
You're genuine!!!!
Boobie R Us...not that I have that much...

:lol:
Those so called know it all's have alot to learn about real life...A sense of humor & a real love beyond death do us part can take us far...maybe even into the realm of forever!!!

:P

PostPosted: Sun Apr 26, 2009 3:31 pm
by Arianddu
JH'sTXfan wrote:
KenTheDude wrote:I've had a shitty weekend so far with one more day to go. I'm building the fence from hell. Neighbor had to work Friday so I tore down the old fence myself. Drilled the new holes myself as well. Almost got all the holes drilled when the auger bit got caught deep in a hole and couldn't pull it back out. Took 2 1/2 hours getting it out. Since I lost those 2 1/2 hours, I wasn't able to set all of the posts in concrete. Well naturally it had to rain like a motherfucker last night (with no rain in the forecast.) All of the remaining holes filled up with water so my neighbor and I spent all morning using a cup to scoop out the water. Finally got all of the posts set and letting them dry overnight so I can frame it up tomorrow.

Also, I stepped on a nail and it came through my toe and bled like a slaughtered pig. On top of that, a post fell over and sheared the electrical cable out of my A/C unit. So I spent 1 1/2 hours wiring up my A/C compressor. Plus, the rope that pull-starts the auger drill broke so I had to run down to the hardware store and get a new rope and take the auger drill apart to restring it.

I'm super-sunburned. Got all kinds of cuts, scrapes, bruises, blisters and sore muscles. Wonder what I have waiting for me tomorrow? :lol:


You'll know you have arrived when they name an ER room after you. :lol:

Image


My ex is well known for having dumb but funny accidents. The one time I had to go to casualty when we lived in Canberra, the staff all knew him by name, and every single one of them asked what he'd done this time.
:lol: :lol:

PostPosted: Sun Apr 26, 2009 9:55 pm
by Michigan Girl
KenTheDude wrote:I've had a shitty weekend so far with one more day to go. I'm building the fence from hell. Neighbor had to work Friday so I tore down the old fence myself. Drilled the new holes myself as well. Almost got all the holes drilled when the auger bit got caught deep in a hole and couldn't pull it back out. Took 2 1/2 hours getting it out. Since I lost those 2 1/2 hours, I wasn't able to set all of the posts in concrete. Well naturally it had to rain like a motherfucker last night (with no rain in the forecast.) All of the remaining holes filled up with water so my neighbor and I spent all morning using a cup to scoop out the water. Finally got all of the posts set and letting them dry overnight so I can frame it up tomorrow.

Also, I stepped on a nail and it came through my toe and bled like a slaughtered pig. On top of that, a post fell over and sheared the electrical cable out of my A/C unit. So I spent 1 1/2 hours wiring up my A/C compressor. Plus, the rope that pull-starts the auger drill broke so I had to run down to the hardware store and get a new rope and take the auger drill apart to restring it.

I'm super-sunburned. Got all kinds of cuts, scrapes, bruises, blisters and sore muscles. Wonder what I have waiting for me tomorrow? :lol:


A better fit?!!? :wink:

PostPosted: Mon Apr 27, 2009 10:45 am
by artist4perry
MBPL AND KEN THIS IS FOR YOU...........

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qd_syuD-N_k

A little clip of Rosanne Rosannadanna :D

Re: HAVE A GREAT SAT AND SUN!!!!

PostPosted: Mon Apr 27, 2009 12:40 pm
by TRAGChick
MBPL wrote:Still writing, although, frustrated with writer's block at the moment...an unimaginable death, to be sure!

I do try to LURK as you all call it and I have found some interesting stuff, but there are so many posts, yikes! I am sure I will get on board again soon. I hope you all are doing well and braving the economic thingy. Me? Well, my paycheck stays the same, rent went up again, BLAH, BLAH, BLAH...Ain't complainin', not at all!

Oh, I got crushes on a couple guys, gosh it's been awhile since I had crushes, what am I, 14?

Please everyone have a great Sat and Sun, and whatever you do enjoy yourselves to the max. And, laugh, remember laughter is a good thing, and laugh at yourself, for God's sake! Give yourself credit, but look hard at yourself and giggle at the great achievement that was created by two people (your parents) who wanted to look at an extension of themselves. Or, perhaps you were brought into this world because…

Two drunks forgot to use condoms. OR,
A woman got knocked up by a man she thought loved her, he didn't and left (my folks). OR,
A married couple thought having you would mend their rocky relationship. OR,
A gay couple asked their best friend to help them out. OR,
You were left in a dumpster by your teen mother. OR,
A spaceship from Venus dropped you in a field where you were raised by bush baboons who escaped by cargo boat from a poor African country. OR,
You are a science project. OR,

Your birth situation here: ________________________________________________ :wink:

ENJOY!!!! MBPL


You are just TOO HYSTERICAL :lol:

Thanx for the laugh....still recovering from the show last night....y'know; hauling Band Equipment, etc...ugh... :x

Re: HAVE A GREAT SAT AND SUN!!!!

PostPosted: Mon Apr 27, 2009 1:11 pm
by Rip Rokken
MBPL wrote:Still writing, although, frustrated with writer's block at the moment...an unimaginable death, to be sure!

I do try to LURK as you all call it and I have found some interesting stuff, but there are so many posts, yikes! I am sure I will get on board again soon. I hope you all are doing well and braving the economic thingy. Me? Well, my paycheck stays the same, rent went up again, BLAH, BLAH, BLAH...Ain't complainin', not at all!

Oh, I got crushes on a couple guys, gosh it's been awhile since I had crushes, what am I, 14?

Please everyone have a great Sat and Sun, and whatever you do enjoy yourselves to the max. And, laugh, remember laughter is a good thing, and laugh at yourself, for God's sake! Give yourself credit, but look hard at yourself and giggle at the great achievement that was created by two people (your parents) who wanted to look at an extension of themselves. Or, perhaps you were brought into this world because…

Two drunks forgot to use condoms. OR,
A woman got knocked up by a man she thought loved her, he didn't and left (my folks). OR,
A married couple thought having you would mend their rocky relationship. OR,
A gay couple asked their best friend to help them out. OR,
You were left in a dumpster by your teen mother. OR,
A spaceship from Venus dropped you in a field where you were raised by bush baboons who escaped by cargo boat from a poor African country. OR,
You are a science project. OR,

Your birth situation here: ________________________________________________ :wink:

ENJOY!!!! MBPL


HAHAHAHA! You ROCK!!!

Re: OH MY!!!

PostPosted: Tue Apr 28, 2009 2:38 am
by MBPL
StoneCold wrote:
MBPL wrote:My crotch is beginning to look like the top of an older black man’s nappy salt and pepper comb-over. It’s probably time for me to break down and go “Brazilian.”

I got my mama’s big-ass boobies. When I lay on my back my tits spill into my armpits looking like two black bald babies in a headlock.

I am hearing impaired, and every few sentences I end up saying, “you said what?” Even with my hearing aids! Once I flushed a hearing aid, the one that fits into the ear, down the toilet at work! True story.



MBPL, tell us your creativity's not going to waste just here on MR. You should be writing comedy for somebody, a show or standup. The headlock baby joke was hilarious. :lol:

And options for "choose how/why you were conceived"? :shock: :) Wow, that was impressive. You should move beyond beaky peartree books and start getting published.

Too bad Whoopie doesn't read MR, I think she'd hire you in an instant. If that's something you might want to pursue, we can shoot some emails over to the view. Hey, youtube worked for Pineda.



Hey, thanks for the compliment, Stone Cold. Believe it or not I don’t write “standup.” I am a character writer, I write plays and now books. Ever since I was a girl I liked making people laugh. Sometimes I make myself sick ‘cause I am always cracking jokes and people think I don’t take life seriously. (My last post about ugly bunions and nappy crotch hairs, not as dramatic as all that, but it made ya’ll laugh, didn’t it?) tee!

As for Whoopi, I met her when she shot Sister Act in San Francisco, at St Paul’s, my old church and where I was confirmed. She approached her trailer and I was going to say “hello,” but I was met with a snort and an evil-eye. :evil: First impressions are vital, so suffice it to say I won’t be contacting Caryn Elaine Johnson, better known in my world as; that nappy-ass ‘locked hair, no eye-brow having, saggy tits mean ole fake-ass Jewish heffa wannabe. But, thanks for the suggestion. Actually, there are quite a few of you on this board who crack me up. I think some of you should consider comedy writing!

Have a great work week and stay away from the swine flu! L :D