TRAGChick wrote:You need a sense of humor to work in a nursing home ~ that is for sure.
MY PRIVATE PART DIED
An old man, Mr.. Wallace, was living in a nursing home.
One day he appeared to be very sad and depressed.
Nurse Tracy asked him if there was
anything wrong.
'Yes, Nurse Tracy,' said Mr. Wallace.
'My Private Part died today, and I am
very sad.'
Knowing her patients were a little
forgetful and sometimes a little crazy,
she replied, 'Oh, I'm so sorry,
Mr. Wallace. Please accept my
condolences.'
The following day, Mr. Wallace was
walking down the hall with his Private
Part hanging out of his pajamas.
He met Nurse Tracy. 'Mr. Wallace,' she
said, 'You shouldn't be walking down
the hall like that. Please put your
Private Part back inside your pajamas.'
'But, Nurse Tracy I can't,' replied Mr.
Wallace. 'I told you yesterday that my
Private Part died.'
'Yes,' said Nurse Tracy , 'you did tell
me that, but why is it hanging out of your pajamas?'
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(You've gotta love this.)
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'Well,' he replied, 'Today is the viewing.'
IF YOU ARE NOT LAUGHING
SOMETHING IS WRONG WITH YOU!!
Great one!
The Hotel Bill
Next time you think your hotel bill is too high, you might want to consider
this:
My wife and I are traveling by car from Victoria to Prince George . Being
Seniors, after almost eleven hours on the road, we were too tired to
continue, and decided to take a room. But, we only planned to sleep for four
hours and then get back on the road. When we checked out four hours later,
the desk clerk handed us a bill for $350.00.
I explode and demanded to know why the charge is so high. I told the clerk
although it's a nice hotel; the rooms certainly aren't worth $350.00 for
four hours. Then the clerk tells me that $350.00 is the 'standard rate'. I
insisted on speaking to the Manager.
The Manager appears, listens to me, and then explains that the hotel has an
Olympic-sized pool and a huge conference centre that were available for us
to use. 'But we didn't use them," I said, ''Well, they are here, and you
could have," explained the Manager.
He went on to explain that we could also have taken in one of the shows for
which the hotel is famous. "We have the best entertainers from New York ,
Hollywood , and Las Vegas perform here," the Manager says.
"But we didn't go to any of those shows," I said. "Well, we have them, and
you could have," the Manager replied.
No matter what amenity the Manager mentioned, I replied, "But we didn't use
it!"
The Manager is unmoved, and eventually I gave up and agreed to pay.
I wrote a check and gave it to the Manager.
The Manager is surprised when he looks at the check."But sir, this check is
only made out for $50.00." ''That's correct. I charged you $300.00 for
sleeping with my wife," I replied.
"But I didn't!" exclaims the Manager.
I said, "Well, too bad, she was here, and you could have."
