Does anyone else have this pet peeve?

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Does anyone else have this pet peeve?

Postby artist4perry » Sun Nov 28, 2010 3:24 pm

I grow to miss you guys sometimes. I keep pretty busy this time of year....I have an art show for my students to put together, plus holiday stuff. Something I have been pondering for a long time in my life.

I was tickled by someones comment that Christians and people who are nice to each other have no business on a forum. Well last time I checked, a forum was an exchange of ideas. I think it is funny someone would find someone like me that much of an irritation that they would suggest someone who thinks like me needs to leave.

I think like many of you, I have fought my right to stay here. Personal beliefs put aside. I have not asked anyone to pussy foot around me, or to not be themselves in any manner at all. I have tried to be open minded even if I don't agree with someone else's opinions, and allotted them the right to disagree with me, and yet I hold no grudges.

I am sure some hate my guts here. Sorry if I don't cry into my pillow all night. :wink: :lol: :lol: :lol:

I spent my whole life dealing with people who tried to fit me into their convenient little molds of who they think I should be.
I grew very tired of not measuring up to those who cannot like themselves unless they make others miserable as they are.

I march to no other drummer than my own.

Do the rest of you get sick of someone putting you down because you don't fit into their mold of who they want you to be?
Why is it the nature of some to dictate how everyone else should think and act?

Just a question in general..........not about anyone in particular.
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Postby Rick » Sun Nov 28, 2010 3:30 pm

I can't imagine anyone not wanting you here. You bring a lot to this board, aside from your artwork, and that includes balance. There are a few rough and tumble posters here, so to balance that out, we need people like you Ginger. If someone suggested you should leave this board, I would suggest that you depart from your normal, cheery, un-profane self and tell them to fuck off. :lol: :lol: :lol:
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Postby artist4perry » Sun Nov 28, 2010 3:34 pm

Rick wrote:I can't imagine anyone not wanting you here. You bring a lot to this board, aside from your artwork, and that includes balance. There are a few rough and tumble posters here, so to balance that out, we need people like you Ginger. If someone suggested you should leave this board, I would suggest that you depart from your normal, cheery, un-profane self and tell them to fuck off. :lol: :lol: :lol:


You can do that for me Rick. :wink: :lol:

No, that was not what I meant. I am not even sure it was directed at me personally. But I did fit their description. :wink:


I grew up my whole life being told I wasn't enough. I was odd, strange, not pretty enough, my art is too odd, etc.

What makes someone tick like that? It is amazing I became an adjusted adult at all. :shock: :shock: :shock:
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Postby artist4perry » Sun Nov 28, 2010 3:39 pm

P.S. I kind of like the tough and tumble posters..........sometimes they crack me up. Deano your a hoot! And TNC..........predictable lefty..........I wonder if he sits up all night composing some of his insults! LOL! I agree, the balance is what makes this place great. No one is scaring me away.


I just was wondering if anyone else has had to deal with as much crap as I had growing up?
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Postby Rick » Sun Nov 28, 2010 3:45 pm

artist4perry wrote:
Rick wrote:I can't imagine anyone not wanting you here. You bring a lot to this board, aside from your artwork, and that includes balance. There are a few rough and tumble posters here, so to balance that out, we need people like you Ginger. If someone suggested you should leave this board, I would suggest that you depart from your normal, cheery, un-profane self and tell them to fuck off. :lol: :lol: :lol:


You can do that for me Rick. :wink: :lol:

No, that was not what I meant. I am not even sure it was directed at me personally. But I did fit their description. :wink:


I grew up my whole life being told I wasn't enough. I was odd, strange, not pretty enough, my art is too odd, etc.

What makes someone tick like that? It is amazing I became an adjusted adult at all. :shock: :shock: :shock:


Whatever it is, I think this board is for everyone, although, sometimes, you need a thicker skin to handle some of the topics.

I'm glad you survived your upbringing and have found your place in life. The first thing anyone on this planet needs to learn to do is love yourself. If you don't like who you are, you're in trouble from the get-go. And that's not easy to do, if you've been brought up not to. I'm the worlds biggest doubter of myself, and while I have a long way to go, I'm working on it. I think nearly everyone has self doubt, some more than others, and it all boils down to your upbringing, nay-saying friends and societal pressure. None of that is insurmountable though. Just keep on keeping on, be yourself, and love yourself for being who you are.
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Postby Angel » Sun Nov 28, 2010 3:46 pm

Here's my deep psychological analysis of what I think you are describing.... :lol:

I think that those people that don't accept others for who they are, are actually the ones that are insecure and lack self confidence. They see someone that is either different or thinks differently than themselves, and instead of being open-minded and accepting of people different from themselves, they resort to insulting that person. It's as though if they insult and belittle someone different from themselves, that in turn makes them better because they now feel they have cut the other person down. It must really be a sad and exhausting life to have to waste so much energy trying to validate themselves by cutting others down. It's such a big and wonderful world with so many unique and interesting people, why would anyone want everyone to be like themselves? Where's the fun in that?

Now, let's all hug and have a Coke!!!! :lol: :lol: :wink:
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Re: Does anyone else have this pet peeve?

Postby ebake02 » Sun Nov 28, 2010 3:49 pm

artist4perry wrote:I spent my whole life dealing with people who tried to fit me into their convenient little molds of who they think I should be.


This something that I have always dealt with from certain members of my family. They believe I should think, act and enjoy the same things they do and because I don't, they have always treated me like I'm the family idiot. I can't understand how some people can be so closed minded.
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Postby artist4perry » Sun Nov 28, 2010 3:54 pm

I guess for me I have always wondered why do we do this to kids?

Why do people compare children against each other, and make one feel they could never measure up?

Angel I know what you say is true. You come to learn that over time. I am having a philosophical moment I guess tonight. Ebake............screw em. :wink:

I was wondering if anyone else dealt with that. Seems it happens to a lot of us.
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Postby mikemarrs » Sun Nov 28, 2010 4:50 pm

i have a sister who has wanted kids all her life.i was the opposite of her and most of the time small children would get on my nerves quite easily.anyway at thirty years of age and quite comfortable with things in my life there is an unexpected arrival.my gal has one baby in november of '04 and a second one born exactly a year later on the same day.i have enjoyed every minute of it and have grown quite fond of being around loads of screaming kids,lol but my sister has had this jealousy thing ever since.literally its like she hates me now because i had kids and she can't.she has even managed to halfway turn my mother against me to with all the bullshit.kinda sad how people can take things and twist them when things don't turn out a certain way.quite sad because those children don't understand why things are the way they are.
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Postby Melissa » Sun Nov 28, 2010 11:55 pm

I'd say if you're happy with who you are, and you have people in your life who love you just the way you are, then that's all that should matter.

In my old age, lol, I've come to realize that it's the 'different' people, or the people who seem to always go against the grain, who actually have the deeper souls, and I've loved learning that. And on the flip side of that, I've come to realize that it's the people who constantly pat themselves on the back and think they never do ANY wrong and everyone else is the problem, they are the ones who are insecure as hell and they are the ones with the major problems. I'm now VERY leery of people who are constantly touting "I'm so good and awesome".

I say be yourself and if someone chooses not to accept you for who you are, then they don't need to be in your life because all they will bring you is hurt. Focus on and appreciate the people who love you.
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Postby DrFU » Mon Nov 29, 2010 12:35 am

"She has become braver as she has aged, less interested in the opinions of those she does not cherish, and has come to realize that she has little to lose, little, any longer, to risk." ~Carolyn Heilbrun~
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Postby Marabelle » Mon Nov 29, 2010 12:47 am

The fact is I love people but I'm more of an observor of life . I'm fine with that. I am always amazed at all the differences amongst all of us. Those differences are what make us unque and individual. However I do gravitate towards people who have similiar souls as mine. I am enthralled by those who have the bravado and spirit to aggressively express themselves, I am in awe of those who are able to get their point across without offending another, I admire those who shyly and discreeting try to speak up for themselves and shocked by those who speak to hurt the spirit of another. It is the most amazing to see the person who is able to express their uniqueness and flourish. I'm bruised easily and I'd rather admire another then to shine. Perhaps that is how I shine.

Those who brush against me or go against my grain I chose not to have in my life. I strive for contentment and peacefulness. I embrace all those practices which help to center my life and make it worthwhile. I love the sensation of love. I love to watch and witness the birth and discovery of a person's life. This is fine for the type of life I live but I can't help but hope that we could all take a bit more time to understand and celebrate the marvel of our uniqueness and individuality. Instead it seems we would rather spend our time trying to chastise and insult others which only causes us to stifle our breathing and result in the stagnation of ourselves.
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Postby Deb » Mon Nov 29, 2010 5:08 am

Angel wrote:Here's my deep psychological analysis of what I think you are describing.... :lol:

I think that those people that don't accept others for who they are, are actually the ones that are insecure and lack self confidence. They see someone that is either different or thinks differently than themselves, and instead of being open-minded and accepting of people different from themselves, they resort to insulting that person. It's as though if they insult and belittle someone different from themselves, that in turn makes them better because they now feel they have cut the other person down. It must really be a sad and exhausting life to have to waste so much energy trying to validate themselves by cutting others down. It's such a big and wonderful world with so many unique and interesting people, why would anyone want everyone to be like themselves? Where's the fun in that?

Now, let's all hug and have a Coke!!!! :lol: :lol: :wink:


Right on the money, Nat. Somebody who is comfortable in their own skin, doesn't feel the need to knock somebody else down to feel that way.
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Postby parfait » Mon Nov 29, 2010 5:34 am

Not really, no.
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Postby Andrew » Mon Nov 29, 2010 9:10 am

Rick wrote:I can't imagine anyone not wanting you here. You bring a lot to this board, aside from your artwork, and that includes balance. There are a few rough and tumble posters here, so to balance that out, we need people like you Ginger. If someone suggested you should leave this board, I would suggest that you depart from your normal, cheery, un-profane self and tell them to fuck off. :lol: :lol: :lol:


I'll step in and help Rick :)
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Postby Rockindeano » Mon Nov 29, 2010 9:28 am

Angel wrote:
Now, let's all hug and snort some Coke!!!! :lol: :lol: :wink:


:shock: :shock:
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Postby Andrew » Mon Nov 29, 2010 9:45 am

Rockindeano wrote:
Angel wrote:
Now, let's all hug and snort some Coke!!!! :lol: :lol: :wink:


:shock: :shock:


I'm drinking some now....does that count?
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Postby Rockindeano » Mon Nov 29, 2010 9:49 am

Andrew wrote:
Rockindeano wrote:
Angel wrote:
Now, let's all hug and snort some Coke!!!! :lol: :lol: :wink:


:shock: :shock:


I'm drinking some now....does that count?


Just think dude, next month when you get your back surgery, you are going to get truck loads of Extra Strength Vicodin or Percecet. Either way you are a winner. Congratulations.
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Postby Andrew » Mon Nov 29, 2010 10:05 am

Rockindeano wrote:
Andrew wrote:
Rockindeano wrote:
Angel wrote:
Now, let's all hug and snort some Coke!!!! :lol: :lol: :wink:


:shock: :shock:


I'm drinking some now....does that count?


Just think dude, next month when you get your back surgery, you are going to get truck loads of Extra Strength Vicodin or Percecet. Either way you are a winner. Congratulations.


Don't want to do it....even though I can hardly sit on my ass and type :)
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Postby Rockindeano » Mon Nov 29, 2010 10:09 am

Andrew wrote:
Rockindeano wrote:
Andrew wrote:
Rockindeano wrote:
Angel wrote:
Now, let's all hug and snort some Coke!!!! :lol: :lol: :wink:


:shock: :shock:


I'm drinking some now....does that count?


Just think dude, next month when you get your back surgery, you are going to get truck loads of Extra Strength Vicodin or Percecet. Either way you are a winner. Congratulations.


Don't want to do it....even though I can hardly sit on my ass and type :)


Read your facebook. All those folks who said either they did it or know someone who did, they all said they are better off now and happy they did it. Word of mouth here says go for it.
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Postby Angel » Mon Nov 29, 2010 10:16 am

Rockindeano wrote:
Andrew wrote:
Rockindeano wrote:
Andrew wrote:
Rockindeano wrote:
Angel wrote:
Now, let's all hug and snort some Coke!!!! :lol: :lol: :wink:


:shock: :shock:


I'm drinking some now....does that count?


Just think dude, next month when you get your back surgery, you are going to get truck loads of Extra Strength Vicodin or Percecet. Either way you are a winner. Congratulations.


Don't want to do it....even though I can hardly sit on my ass and type :)


Read your facebook. All those folks who said either they did it or know someone who did, they all said they are better off now and happy they did it. Word of mouth here says go for it.


Listen to Deano, Drew. He knows what it takes to be able to sit on your ass and type all day long. :lol:
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Postby RedWingFan » Mon Nov 29, 2010 10:17 am

Angel wrote:
Rockindeano wrote:
Andrew wrote:
Rockindeano wrote:
Andrew wrote:
Rockindeano wrote:
Angel wrote:
Now, let's all hug and snort some Coke!!!! :lol: :lol: :wink:


:shock: :shock:


I'm drinking some now....does that count?


Just think dude, next month when you get your back surgery, you are going to get truck loads of Extra Strength Vicodin or Percecet. Either way you are a winner. Congratulations.


Don't want to do it....even though I can hardly sit on my ass and type :)


Read your facebook. All those folks who said either they did it or know someone who did, they all said they are better off now and happy they did it. Word of mouth here says go for it.


Listen to Deano, Drew. He knows what it takes to be able to sit on your ass and type all day long. :lol:

Hahahahahaha!!!
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Postby S2M » Mon Nov 29, 2010 10:58 am

Personally, I couldn't care less what people think of me....I mean - it would be nice to be liked, accepted....etc. But what it comes down to is being consistent, and comfortable with who you are....no compromising of your values just to go with the flow. Sticktuitiveness is the key. Never waver, never vascillate...never give in.

Political Correctness is slowly rotting this country....I say it like it is. I don't mean to be mean for the sake of being mean.

If your music sucks - I'm gonna tell you. If I disagree with what you've said - I'm going to call you out. Business, never personal.

I really try not to get personal....sometimes I may use a name, or phrase - IN JEST ONLY. Never to denigrate.

Ultimately, i enjoy people who can think laterally....and never let emotion cloud judgment. There's nothing worse than hearing that someone believes in something because that's how they were raised, or because that's how they have always thought. 'Muh daddy hated niggers, so I's hate them to' :roll:
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Postby Rockindeano » Mon Nov 29, 2010 11:36 am

Angel wrote:
Rockindeano wrote:
Andrew wrote:
Rockindeano wrote:
Andrew wrote:
Rockindeano wrote:
Angel wrote:
Now, let's all hug and snort some Coke!!!! :lol: :lol: :wink:


:shock: :shock:


I'm drinking some now....does that count?


Just think dude, next month when you get your back surgery, you are going to get truck loads of Extra Strength Vicodin or Percecet. Either way you are a winner. Congratulations.


Don't want to do it....even though I can hardly sit on my ass and type :)


Read your facebook. All those folks who said either they did it or know someone who did, they all said they are better off now and happy they did it. Word of mouth here says go for it.


Listen to Deano, Drew. He knows what it takes to be able to sit on your ass and type all day long. :lol:


Can it, Whore. :evil: :lol:
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Postby Deb » Mon Nov 29, 2010 11:38 am

S2M wrote:Personally, I couldn't care less what people think of me....I mean - it would be nice to be liked, accepted....etc. But what it comes down to is being consistent, and comfortable with who you are....no compromising of your values just to go with the flow. Sticktuitiveness is the key. Never waver, never vascillate...never give in.

Political Correctness is slowly rotting this country....I say it like it is. I don't mean to be mean for the sake of being mean.

If your music sucks - I'm gonna tell you. If I disagree with what you've said - I'm going to call you out. Business, never personal.

I really try not to get personal....sometimes I may use a name, or phrase - IN JEST ONLY. Never to denigrate.

Ultimately, i enjoy people who can think laterally....and never let emotion cloud judgment. There's nothing worse than hearing that someone believes in something because that's how they were raised, or because that's how they have always thought. 'Muh daddy hated niggers, so I's hate them to' :roll:


I agree with this too. I'm not saying everybody has to have sunshine shining out their ass and never say anything negative. I respect the hell out of people that tell it exactly how they feel whether I like their opinion or not. But personal slams or attacks usually come from peeps that have an insecurity within. I enjoy a great musical debate. Although sometimes can't help emotion getting involved. LOL very passionate person, and that includes my music. :lol: :twisted:
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Postby Melissa » Mon Nov 29, 2010 11:58 am

Deb wrote:
S2M wrote:Personally, I couldn't care less what people think of me....I mean - it would be nice to be liked, accepted....etc. But what it comes down to is being consistent, and comfortable with who you are....no compromising of your values just to go with the flow. Sticktuitiveness is the key. Never waver, never vascillate...never give in.

Political Correctness is slowly rotting this country....I say it like it is. I don't mean to be mean for the sake of being mean.

If your music sucks - I'm gonna tell you. If I disagree with what you've said - I'm going to call you out. Business, never personal.

I really try not to get personal....sometimes I may use a name, or phrase - IN JEST ONLY. Never to denigrate.

Ultimately, i enjoy people who can think laterally....and never let emotion cloud judgment. There's nothing worse than hearing that someone believes in something because that's how they were raised, or because that's how they have always thought. 'Muh daddy hated niggers, so I's hate them to' :roll:


I agree with this too. I'm not saying everybody has to have sunshine shining out their ass and never say anything negative. I respect the hell out of people that tell it exactly how they feel whether I like their opinion or not. But personal slams or attacks usually come from peeps that have an insecurity within. I enjoy a great musical debate. Although sometimes can't help emotion getting involved. LOL very passionate person, and that includes my music. :lol: :twisted:


I agree too Deb, and the name-calling around here I've always found to just be par for here, lol, as well as highly entertaining :lol:
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Postby Babyblue » Mon Nov 29, 2010 11:59 am

Deb wrote:
S2M wrote:Personally, I couldn't care less what people think of me....I mean - it would be nice to be liked, accepted....etc. But what it comes down to is being consistent, and comfortable with who you are....no compromising of your values just to go with the flow. Sticktuitiveness is the key. Never waver, never vascillate...never give in.

Political Correctness is slowly rotting this country....I say it like it is. I don't mean to be mean for the sake of being mean.

If your music sucks - I'm gonna tell you. If I disagree with what you've said - I'm going to call you out. Business, never personal.

I really try not to get personal....sometimes I may use a name, or phrase - IN JEST ONLY. Never to denigrate.

Ultimately, i enjoy people who can think laterally....and never let emotion cloud judgment. There's nothing worse than hearing that someone believes in something because that's how they were raised, or because that's how they have always thought. 'Muh daddy hated niggers, so I's hate them to' :roll:


I agree with this too. I'm not saying everybody has to have sunshine shining out their ass and never say anything negative. I respect the hell out of people that tell it exactly how they feel whether I like their opinion or not. But personal slams or attacks usually come from peeps that have an insecurity within. I enjoy a great musical debate. Although sometimes can't help emotion getting involved. LOL very passionate person, and that includes my music. :lol: :twisted:



I agree with the both of you. :D :D Be true to yourself! We love ya Ginger never change sweetie. :D :wink:
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Postby Angel » Mon Nov 29, 2010 12:13 pm

I agree...name calling in a joking manner and disagreeing with someone are totally different than insulting and disrepecting someone.

For example, I disagree with Dean when he says I'm a whore, but I respect the fact that he only says that because he's a drunken idiot who frequently soils himself. :wink:
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Postby artist4perry » Mon Nov 29, 2010 12:51 pm

Andrew wrote:
Rick wrote:I can't imagine anyone not wanting you here. You bring a lot to this board, aside from your artwork, and that includes balance. There are a few rough and tumble posters here, so to balance that out, we need people like you Ginger. If someone suggested you should leave this board, I would suggest that you depart from your normal, cheery, un-profane self and tell them to fuck off. :lol: :lol: :lol:


I'll step in and help Rick :)


:D Wow! Great friends here!

Hugs to all. Screw anyone who cannot tolerate a difference in someone else.

I think we come to the same conclusion in time after dealing with people's insecure crap, they just are not worth listening to.

How useless is the person who cannot accept you for who you are? :D
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Postby artist4perry » Mon Nov 29, 2010 12:54 pm

Angel wrote:I agree...name calling in a joking manner and disagreeing with someone are totally different than insulting and disrepecting someone.

For example, I disagree with Dean when he says I'm a whore, but I respect the fact that he only says that because he's a drunken idiot who frequently soils himself. :wink:


He tells great stories about it afterwords, too! :wink: :lol: :lol:
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