TVL wrote:yes, I can agree with that...my comment wasn't in reference to what you are looking for or directed towards you....and showing responsibility is important.... I just meant it speaks of the dude when he has to throw out what all he has in the first approach. He has plenty of lures for his fishing expedition...usually means he's not trustworthy because he likes to catch a lot of fish and aint gonna be happy with just one. May never get full on just one....so when a fish sees the hook it might be a signal to swim away. Just sayin'.
LOL... I agree with your sage opinion. I didn't figure it was directed at me, but after you said what you did in response to the other post, I had to restate my basis of judgement. But the sad thing about what you said is that a lot of women are looking for those 'hooks'. Those types want a man with all the 'things' because to them it means a free ride or someone to take care of them.
My ex, bless his pitiful heart, has been back on the dating scene in a big new city for almost four months. When we were together he talked about wanting to go back to school to get his Master's degree in education because his dream was to teach. Which I fully supported because I thought it would be a perfect fit for him, and he'd be a whole lot less stressed than with the career he has now.
We were hanging out at a bar a few weeks ago and he told me he was getting tired of being burned by these city girls who thought he was great when they were out with him, but when they saw his apartment (which isn't really all that bad, just in a less than attractive neighborhood), his car, and how little furniture he had, they cut tail and ran. So now he's reconsidering, says now he'll go back to school for his MBA that way he can make really good money to support the 'family' he'll one day have.
A romantic idea on the surface, and just indicative of what a good self-sacrificing nature he has, but I all but chewed him out over even attempting to make himself believe he should do that. If the only reason to do that is to get a woman who'll want him for his money (basically what it boils down to) and as well for who he is, then he will find himself miserable, regretful, and a divorcee in no time flat. I told him if the woman loved him, and was really the type of person he should attempt to marry, then she'd love him just as much whether he were a teacher or a business shark. He agreed but said it didn't matter. He wants to give his wife and kids a good life, and if that means doing something he hates, for more money, while giving up on his dream, he will.
But he doesn't see my side of it, he needs to live for himself, and not for some hypothetical situation revolving around some bitch who's basis of attraction was on material objects.