MR

I started a thread kind of like this quite a while ago, but thought it would be fun to revive... I'll start this off with something I did that was embarassing in the past, then YOU add your own stories.

I grew up in a very small town with one church. During Sunday services, we sat for what seemed an ETERNITY listening to our monotone pastor. When he would preach, the church was dead silent. The church was pretty big and when he spoke, the sound of his voice would echo.

I remember one day in particular, I was sitting on the front row with my family listening to a typical Sunday service... very boring to me as a child. As I was sitting there, I suddenly felt some movement in my stomache. I tried waiting for the pastor to finish before rushing the restroom, but this was one of his LONG...DRAWN OUT sermons! Right as he closed the sermon and went into a prayer... I let out the LOUDEST fart known to man!!! As the sound echo'd throughout the church... I felt the every eye of the church focus on me... then my dad smacked the SHIT out of me.

Okay... now YOUR turn!

G.I.Jim wrote:I started a thread kind of like this quite a while ago, but thought it would be fun to revive... I'll start this off with something I did that was embarassing in the past, then YOU add your own stories.

I grew up in a very small town with one church. During Sunday services, we sat for what seemed an ETERNITY listening to our monotone pastor. When he would preach, the church was dead silent. The church was pretty big and when he spoke, the sound of his voice would echo.

I remember one day in particular, I was sitting on the front row with my family listening to a typical Sunday service... very boring to me as a child. As I was sitting there, I suddenly felt some movement in my stomache. I tried waiting for the pastor to finish before rushing the restroom, but this was one of his LONG...DRAWN OUT sermons! Right as he closed the sermon and went into a prayer... I let out the LOUDEST fart known to man!!! As the sound echo'd throughout the church... I felt the every eye of the church focus on me... then my dad smacked the SHIT out of me.
Okay... now YOUR turn!

Well, at least your tummy was relieved. LOL! When I was 4? I had to go in church real bad, I told mom and she told me to hush, and I had to go! So I did............thankfully everyone else was standing up. And they stayed that way, the pew had little river running both ways.

lol!! that made me laugh, thank you.

ummm, i'll have to think on this one, don't want to give too much away

artist4perry wrote:

G.I.Jim wrote:I started a thread kind of like this quite a while ago, but thought it would be fun to revive... I'll start this off with something I did that was embarassing in the past, then YOU add your own stories.

I grew up in a very small town with one church. During Sunday services, we sat for what seemed an ETERNITY listening to our monotone pastor. When he would preach, the church was dead silent. The church was pretty big and when he spoke, the sound of his voice would echo.

I remember one day in particular, I was sitting on the front row with my family listening to a typical Sunday service... very boring to me as a child. As I was sitting there, I suddenly felt some movement in my stomache. I tried waiting for the pastor to finish before rushing the restroom, but this was one of his LONG...DRAWN OUT sermons! Right as he closed the sermon and went into a prayer... I let out the LOUDEST fart known to man!!! As the sound echo'd throughout the church... I felt the every eye of the church focus on me... then my dad smacked the SHIT out of me.
Okay... now YOUR turn!

Well, at least your tummy was relieved. LOL! When I was 4? I had to go in church real bad, I told mom and she told me to hush, and I had to go! So I did............thankfully everyone else was standing up. And they stayed that way, the pew had little river running both ways.

I'm sure there are a LOT of chilldhood church stories out there like ours... thanks for sharing that one, and hopefully your parents learned a lesson from it!

G.I.Jim wrote:

artist4perry wrote:

G.I.Jim wrote:I started a thread kind of like this quite a while ago, but thought it would be fun to revive... I'll start this off with something I did that was embarassing in the past, then YOU add your own stories.

I grew up in a very small town with one church. During Sunday services, we sat for what seemed an ETERNITY listening to our monotone pastor. When he would preach, the church was dead silent. The church was pretty big and when he spoke, the sound of his voice would echo.

I remember one day in particular, I was sitting on the front row with my family listening to a typical Sunday service... very boring to me as a child. As I was sitting there, I suddenly felt some movement in my stomache. I tried waiting for the pastor to finish before rushing the restroom, but this was one of his LONG...DRAWN OUT sermons! Right as he closed the sermon and went into a prayer... I let out the LOUDEST fart known to man!!! As the sound echo'd throughout the church... I felt the every eye of the church focus on me... then my dad smacked the SHIT out of me.
Okay... now YOUR turn!

Well, at least your tummy was relieved. LOL! When I was 4? I had to go in church real bad, I told mom and she told me to hush, and I had to go! So I did............thankfully everyone else was standing up. And they stayed that way, the pew had little river running both ways.

I'm sure there are a LOT of chilldhood church stories out there like ours... thanks for sharing that one, and hopefully your parents learned a lesson from it!

They learned I meant what I said..........in the grocery store, church, etc..................LOL! Oh well, I was still little!

Well I just realized that I never listed my age in my post... I was around 10, and still remember it like it was yesterday!

Lula wrote:lol!! that made me laugh, thank you.

ummm, i'll have to think on this one, don't want to give too much away

You're welcome. Now let's hear some dirt girl!

I was at a friends house for a party. We were playing Pictionary, and our team had the drawing board. A lady on our team was drawing, and I was concentrating on it. I was standing behind the couch, and kind of bent over to look around someone else, and out of nowhere I let a LOUD one rip. The whole place just froze and turned and looked at me. I can only guess what the look on my face was, and all I could say was "Oops!" Everyone just fell out laughing. It was embarrassing as hell because I didn't know most of these people. Thank god they had a sense of humor.

Rick wrote:I was at a friends house for a party. We were playing Pictionary, and our team had the drawing board. A lady on our team was drawing, and I was concentrating on it. I was standing behind the couch, and kind of bent over to look around someone else, and out of nowhere I let a LOUD one rip. The whole place just froze and turned and looked at me. I can only guess what the look on my face was, and all I could say was "Oops!" Everyone just fell out laughing. It was embarrassing as hell because I didn't know most of these people. Thank god they had a sense of humor.

That was AWESOME Rick! I laughed so hard reading this, that I probably woke up my son just now!! Keep 'em coming people!

On one Sunday a month the kids in our church would have our own service called "Children's Church" in a smaller sanctuary separate from the adults. Earlier, in Sunday School we had a snack of Oreo cookies and grape kool-aid which was not sitting well on my stomach. Our pastor's wife was leading the children's church when my stomach gave me a last big warning to get out of there. Being the polite, little kid I was, I walked up to her to ask her permission to leave because I was sick.

Well, she proceeded to start a looooong prayer for me while I stood there getting greener and greener. By the time she was finished I took off for the door and upchucked oreos and grape koolaid all over the carpet in the doorway, and all the way down the hall to the bathroom. I'll bet after cleaning that up that she thought twice about detaining a sick kid.

I still to this day cannot stand the smell of oreos or grape kool-aid.

JH'sTXfan wrote:On one Sunday a month the kids in our church would have our own service called "Children's Church" in a smaller sanctuary separate from the adults. Earlier, in Sunday School we had a snack of Oreo cookies and grape kool-aid which was not sitting well on my stomach. Our pastor's wife was leading the children's church when my stomach gave me a last big warning to get out of there. Being the polite, little kid I was, I walked up to her to ask her permission to leave because I was sick.

Well, she proceeded to start a looooong prayer for me while I stood there getting greener and greener. By the time she was finished I took off for the door and upchucked oreos and grape koolaid all over the carpet in the doorway, and all the way down the hall to the bathroom. I'll bet after cleaning that up that she thought twice about detaining a sick kid.

I still to this day cannot stand the smell of oreos or grape kool-aid.

That's what she gets!

Hmm... I can't think of all that many ridiculous "flushing red" type stories. I've had some embarrassing moments out on the tennis court where I've lost my temper and made myself look like a fool... got over that a couple years ago.

What about that time I was drunk and "forgot" to pull out?

Hmm... I'll have to think about this and come back.

Rick wrote:I was at a friends house for a party. We were playing Pictionary, and our team had the drawing board. A lady on our team was drawing, and I was concentrating on it. I was standing behind the couch, and kind of bent over to look around someone else, and out of nowhere I let a LOUD one rip. The whole place just froze and turned and looked at me. I can only guess what the look on my face was, and all I could say was "Oops!" Everyone just fell out laughing. It was embarrassing as hell because I didn't know most of these people. Thank god they had a sense of humor.

What's embarrassing about that?

I should come with a fuckin disclaimer, I must rip about 100 a day. Maybe I've got colon cancer

Ehwmatt wrote:

Rick wrote:I was at a friends house for a party. We were playing Pictionary, and our team had the drawing board. A lady on our team was drawing, and I was concentrating on it. I was standing behind the couch, and kind of bent over to look around someone else, and out of nowhere I let a LOUD one rip. The whole place just froze and turned and looked at me. I can only guess what the look on my face was, and all I could say was "Oops!" Everyone just fell out laughing. It was embarrassing as hell because I didn't know most of these people. Thank god they had a sense of humor.

What's embarrassing about that?

I should come with a fuckin disclaimer, I must rip about 100 a day. Maybe I've got colon cancer

Well if you have something better... let's hear it beotch!!!

I remember being 8 years old and one of the teachers making me eat the tomato in the salad at lunch. Now, as an adult, I know that I'm allergic to something in raw tomato that obviously breaks down with heat because I'm fine with cooked tomato, but at 8, all I knew was I didn't like raw tomato and it made me feel ill. I didn't think I was allergic, because Mamma was allergic to eggs in the 'knife used to cut a roll glazed with egg that then spreads the butter on her bread and she goes into anaphylactic shock' kind of way, so that's what I thought allergic meant. I don't like the taste anyway, and my parents never made me eat it, so no one ever told the school I had an allergy.

Anyway, I deliberately hadn't taken any of the tomato in the salad, just some lettuce and stuff, and this busy-body teacher read me a three mintute lecture about fussy eaters and dumped 3 quarter tomato pieces on my plate and told me to eat them. I told her hated tomato, my parents didn't make me eat it and it would make me sick. More lecture, more nagging, and then she told me I couldn't leave the table until I ate it. Eventually I gave in and ate one piece. She started in on me with "see, that wasn't so bad, didn't you like it really, now eat the other 2 pieces" while I sat there feeling it burn all the way down. I could already feel the burning around my mouth where I was going to develop a six day case of eczma. She kept nagging, I just waited, then after about 10 minutes when my stomach was good and burning, I yelled "hey everyone, look at this!", turned around and deliberately threw up into her lap. Then pulled down my lower lip to show her all the big black spots where the blood blisters in my mouth were forming. At that point, I figured she deserved every gross thing I could throw at her for refusing to listen to me and bullying me into eating something I didn't want to.

What embarrassed me was that when she saw the blood blisters and the smell of my vomit hit her, she fainted. Forward. Onto me. Covered in my sick. With everyone from my school watching and laughing.

Mind you, no one has ever tried to make me eat raw tomato since.

Rick wrote:I was at a friends house for a party. We were playing Pictionary, and our team had the drawing board. A lady on our team was drawing, and I was concentrating on it. I was standing behind the couch, and kind of bent over to look around someone else, and out of nowhere I let a LOUD one rip. The whole place just froze and turned and looked at me. I can only guess what the look on my face was, and all I could say was "Oops!" Everyone just fell out laughing. It was embarrassing as hell because I didn't know most of these people. Thank god they had a sense of humor.

HE did it!

G.I.Jim wrote:

Ehwmatt wrote:

Rick wrote:I was at a friends house for a party. We were playing Pictionary, and our team had the drawing board. A lady on our team was drawing, and I was concentrating on it. I was standing behind the couch, and kind of bent over to look around someone else, and out of nowhere I let a LOUD one rip. The whole place just froze and turned and looked at me. I can only guess what the look on my face was, and all I could say was "Oops!" Everyone just fell out laughing. It was embarrassing as hell because I didn't know most of these people. Thank god they had a sense of humor.

What's embarrassing about that?

I should come with a fuckin disclaimer, I must rip about 100 a day. Maybe I've got colon cancer

Well if you have something better... let's hear it beotch!!!

I'm trying to think damnit!

Arianddu wrote:I remember being 8 years old and one of the teachers making me eat the tomato in the salad at lunch. Now, as an adult, I know that I'm allergic to something in raw tomato that obviously breaks down with heat because I'm fine with cooked tomato, but at 8, all I knew was I didn't like raw tomato and it made me feel ill. I didn't think I was allergic, because Mamma was allergic to eggs in the 'knife used to cut a roll glazed with egg that then spreads the butter on her bread and she goes into anaphylactic shock' kind of way, so that's what I thought allergic meant. I don't like the taste anyway, and my parents never made me eat it, so no one ever told the school I had an allergy.

Anyway, I deliberately hadn't taken any of the tomato in the salad, just some lettuce and stuff, and this busy-body teacher read me a three mintute lecture about fussy eaters and dumped 3 quarter tomato pieces on my plate and told me to eat them. I told her hated tomato, my parents didn't make me eat it and it would make me sick. More lecture, more nagging, and then she told me I couldn't leave the table until I ate it. Eventually I gave in and ate one piece. She started in on me with "see, that wasn't so bad, didn't you like it really, now eat the other 2 pieces" while I sat there feeling it burn all the way down. I could already feel the burning around my mouth where I was going to develop a six day case of eczma. She kept nagging, I just waited, then after about 10 minutes when my stomach was good and burning, I yelled "hey everyone, look at this!", turned around and deliberately threw up into her lap. Then pulled down my lower lip to show her all the big black spots where the blood blisters in my mouth were forming. At that point, I figured she deserved every gross thing I could throw at her for refusing to listen to me and bullying me into eating something I didn't want to.

What embarrassed me was that when she saw the blood blisters and the smell of my vomit hit her, she fainted. Forward. Onto me. Covered in my sick. With everyone from my school watching and laughing.

Mind you, no one has ever tried to make me eat raw tomato since.

Damn girl... I think that changed from embarrassing, to leaving SCARS! It was funny that she passed out though, and I bet she never made another child do that again.

Ehwmatt wrote:

G.I.Jim wrote:

Ehwmatt wrote:

Rick wrote:I was at a friends house for a party. We were playing Pictionary, and our team had the drawing board. A lady on our team was drawing, and I was concentrating on it. I was standing behind the couch, and kind of bent over to look around someone else, and out of nowhere I let a LOUD one rip. The whole place just froze and turned and looked at me. I can only guess what the look on my face was, and all I could say was "Oops!" Everyone just fell out laughing. It was embarrassing as hell because I didn't know most of these people. Thank god they had a sense of humor.

What's embarrassing about that?

I should come with a fuckin disclaimer, I must rip about 100 a day. Maybe I've got colon cancer

Well if you have something better... let's hear it beotch!!!

I'm trying to think damnit!

You're just scared to throw something out there... Bok Bok Bok...

My church story's not nearly as entertaining as the rest of yours, but here goes:

When I was about 4 years old I was a precocious little boy. (Go figure. ) Anyway, this one preacher we had would give these rather lively fire & brimstone type sermons that echoed loudly through the church. Every now & then he would shout out something like, "Can Ya Hear Me, People!?!" so I would take it upon myself to wave my hands in the air & shout back, "Yes we can! Preach it, brother" or "Amen to that, sista." I wasn't trying to be mean or disruptive. I simply took the questions literally. I thought he wanted a response. The other children as well as some adults struggled to muffle the sounds of their giggling when out of the silence rang another one of my "Preach it, brother" replies. Then, every now & again someone's muffled laughter would sneak past their lips which caused more giggles throughout the church.

Oh --- my mother wanted to kill me!!!

The most recent thing I did that was embarrassing was during my May/June 08' trip to Japan, I saw a beautiful piece of jewelery about a week before I was returning that I wanted to buy for my wife. So I figured I'd just put it on my credit card and then pay the card off in full when I return to the U.S. A few days before I had purchased three pairs of dress shoes for myself so I knew (or at least I thought I knew) that the card was working over there. So I go into the jewelery shop and look at the piece for a little while and then decide to get it. So the Japanese woman and man are wrapping it up and making a big deal out of it by asking me so many questions like who's it for, and that I really must love the person I'm getting it for, etc. etc. I told them it's for a very beautiful Japanese woman in my life...my wife. They really thought my answer was so nice. So when it comes time to use my card, it is fucking declined, after they have giftwrapped it and everything. So deflated I walk out of the shop without the piece of jewelery I had my heart set on giving to my wife. For two days I'm just racking my brain wondering what the fuck happened, it worked when I purchased my shoes and I know the credit limit wasn't the issue. Then all of a sudden the night before I was to be heading to the airport the next day at noon , it dawned on me, I didn't inform the financial institution that issued me that card that I was going to use it in Japan. So I got on the bat phone at 3am in the morning Japan time and called the states and informed the card company that I was in Japan and needed to use this card there. They informed me that when I had made the shoe purchase, that flagged the account since it was in Japan and they then suspended the account from any further transactions until they could ask me about it. So after our little conversation, they threw the switch on the card and when that jewelery store opened up at 11am the next morning, I was the first one in the door and purchased that piece right before heading to the airport via three hour train ride. This time.....the card worked! But that was so fucking embarrassing when it didn't work the couple days before after they gift wrapped it and everything.

And she loved it......especially when I told her what I went through to get it for her.

The Sushi Hunter wrote:The most recent thing I did that was embarrassing was during my May/June 08' trip to Japan, I saw a beautiful piece of jewelery about a week before I was returning that I wanted to buy for my wife. So I figured I'd just put it on my credit card and then pay the card off in full when I return to the U.S. A few days before I had purchased three pairs of dress shoes for myself so I knew (or at least I thought I knew) that the card was working over there. So I go into the jewelery shop and look at the piece for a little while and then decide to get it. So the Japanese woman and man are wrapping it up and making a big deal out of it by asking me so many questions like who's it for, and that I really must love the person I'm getting it for, etc. etc. I told them it's for a very beautiful Japanese woman in my life...my wife. They really thought my answer was so nice. So when it comes time to use my card, it is fucking declined, after they have giftwrapped it and everything. So deflated I walk out of the shop without the piece of jewelery I had my heart set on giving to my wife. For two days I'm just racking my brain wondering what the fuck happened, it worked when I purchased my shoes and I know the credit limit wasn't the issue. Then all of a sudden the night before I was to be heading to the airport the next day at noon , it dawned on me, I didn't inform the financial institution that issued me that card that I was going to use it in Japan. So I got on the bat phone at 3am in the morning Japan time and called the states and informed the card company that I was in Japan and needed to use this card there. They informed me that when I had made the shoe purchase, that flagged the account since it was in Japan and they then suspended the account from any further transactions until they could ask me about it. So after our little conversation, they threw the switch on the card and when that jewelery store opened up at 11am the next morning, I was the first one in the door and purchased that piece right before heading to the airport via three hour train ride. This time.....the card worked! But that was so fucking embarrassing when it didn't work the couple days before after they gift wrapped it and everything.

And she loved it......especially when I told her what I went through to get it for her.

I got a headache

My appologies Stevew2. I just got this incredibly long attention span, which makes the duration of most everything seem so short to me.

The Sushi Hunter wrote:My appologies Stevew2. I just got this incredibly long attention span, which makes the duration of most everything seem so short to me.

Thats good for you I got ADD and cant pay attention for shit.its all good im gone

Too many to list...have you got about a year...

When I was in highschool I didn't have a car. So you do what most kids that don't have cars do - you make friends with a kid who has one. Like most towns/cities we have a teenage hotspot called 'The Ave'...and there are numerous eateries. One day we were hanging out with 'Wheels' (that's the kid with the car, no - we didn't call him that then), and we were in McDs drivethru. I found myself admiring the person in the drivers seat of the vehicle in front of us, and exclaimed to my friend, 'Hey, that girl's hot..when we get the food pull up so I can see.' We pulled up alright, and the long flowing blonde hair really fooled me, cause the person was moustachioed. To THIS day I STILL get called on that one whenever we are in a drivethru.

These are great stories... good thread Jim! Although I don't understand why everyone has to be so *gasp, shock* when someone farts. Jeeze... everybody does it.

I'm going to have to think on this one. I don't embarrass very easily, if at all.

StocktontoMalone wrote:When I was in highschool I didn't have a car. So you do what most kids that don't have cars do - you make friends with a kid who has one. Like most towns/cities we have a teenage hotspot called 'The Ave'...and there are numerous eateries. One day we were hanging out with 'Wheels' (that's the kid with the car, no - we didn't call him that then), and we were in McDs drivethru. I found myself admiring the person in the drivers seat of the vehicle in front of us, and exclaimed to my friend, 'Hey, that girl's hot..when we get the food pull up so I can see.' We pulled up alright, and the long flowing blonde hair really fooled me, cause the person was moustachioed. To THIS day I STILL get called on that one whenever we are in a drivethru.

That's hilarious! Ouch

Rhiannon wrote:I'm going to have to think on this one. I don't embarrass very easily, if at all.

Some people don't. S'ok. I bet you have a couple.

"Cover yo'seff up, nigga" - omg, remember who said that? In a really public place?
She was really embarrassed!

bluejeangirl76 wrote:

Rhiannon wrote:I'm going to have to think on this one. I don't embarrass very easily, if at all.

Some people don't. S'ok. I bet you have a couple.

"Cover yo'seff up, nigga" - omg, remember who said that? In a really public place?
She was really embarrassed!

No, no... she was like "oof! Me & my big mouth!" But not embarrassed.
Do not go down this road with me, lady, I remember that one evening standing outside that bar in Edison Park...