MR

Today is Doris Banbury's 79th B-Day. Just wanted to say happy birthday to my mom. She is slowly fading away, but still a bit fiesty while living with Dementia and now Parkinson's.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PlCyR1jFFY8
BIRTHDAY VIDEO


To everyone's mom, dad or guardian who raised thier children, by example, to be productive healthy adults, job well done!!


THE FOREHEAD FAMILY!
Me, mom, younger bone-headed bro David and
his oldest child Denise, whom I call "Pud"


Doris, 1050's New York

Happy birthday to your Mom, Lorrie.

My mom just turned 83 in October. She too is declining both physically and mentally. It's difficult to watch someone you love fading away, but I try to focus on the good days and appreciate the little joys that spending time with my Mom can bring.

Peartree12249 wrote:Happy birthday to your Mom, Lorrie.

My mom just turned 83 in October. She too is declining both physically and mentally. It's difficult to watch someone you love fading away, but I try to focus on the good days and appreciate the little joys that spending time with my Mom can bring.

Thank you. Yes dear, that is all we can (do). My heart breaks every day, the pain is intense, but trying to remain positive is the best defense, I find. All the best to your mom. MBPL

Happy Birthday, Ms. Doris!

Here's to strong, smart, fabulous women of all ages!

as a once beautiful flower blooming in the sun; we still see magic and wonder as the petals start to fade. moms are the most precious and most loved flower in the garden of life; we all must continue to cherish our mothers till the last petal fades away.

Marabelle wrote:as a once beautiful flower blooming in the sun; we still see magic and wonder as the petals start to fade. moms are the most precious and most loved flower in the garden of life; we all must continue to cherish our mothers till the last petal fades away.

Thank you, Miss Linda. Beautifully put, Lady Marabelle

A VERY happy birthday to your mom, Lorrie! Cherish EVERY moment that you have, and especially cherish the 'undemented' moments. Those moments are VERY VERY special.

Fourt9rkim wrote:A VERY happy birthday to your mom, Lorrie! Cherish EVERY moment that you have, and especially cherish the 'undemented' moments. Those moments are VERY VERY special.

Hey Kim. "Undemented" *snort* that's cute. Actually, remembering moments reminds me of two stories I sometimes tell to this day. Can I bore everyone beyond recognition for a moment? Thanks.

We lived in a lower income complex in the bay Area, a much nicer community-oriented place than it is now. Mom, a single parent, struggled to support two kids without their fathers, blah, blah. But her twisted sense of humor is what I appreciate the most.

First remembrance: David and I would not go to bed. I think I was 7 and he was 4, something like that. We stood at the top of the stairs by our bedrooms defiantly opposed to going to bed. I said, "we don't want to go to bed." And of course David being my shadow adjusted his tiny cat's eye bottle-bottom eye glasses, he inherited severe near-sightedness from mom, and echoed the sentiment, "no, we don't want to go to bed." Mom, who stood at the base of the stairs replied, "all right, okay, but the boogieman will get you."

There was a light switch at the bottom of the stairs. Mom turned off the switch, it was pitch black, and suddenly we heard this scary moan, "Whoooo, whooooooooo"! We looked down at the base of the steps at mom holding a flashlight under her chin and glaring her big teeth. The light bounced off her teeth and her thick bifocals and of course to us it was the boogie man. Suffice it to say we went to bed.

Second remembrance: We were raised Catholics and Christmas was a big thing in our home at the time. But, many Christmases mom forgot the batteries to go with our toys. One particular Christmas I helped David set up his Hot Wheels but when we flipped the switch nothing happened. Well, David screamed bloody murder. Mom got so frustrated she started crying.

Mom is a South Bronx native and David and I are California-raised kids, our mentalities are different. Mom seemed pretty harsh at times especially in her delivery. First she calmed down, then gave David candy then she snapped, "there are no batteries, you'll have to wait until tomorrow because your mother forgot to buy them, dammit all to hell! I don't know why they don't put those things inside the toys in the first damned place. You didn't hear your mother curse and if you repeat it you will be spanked!" Then one of us asked, "how come Santa didn't get more toys?" And that's when mom delivered....

"Because Santa Claus is a short, near-sighted black woman with one paycheck!"

I will NEVER forget those "undemented" moments, Kim. Thanks all and pardon me for blithering on, I have a lull at work. L

Nice memories of your mother - she sounds like someone you don't easily forget! I remember pulling that "is that all the presents there are?" and it didn't go over very well, but I think my mom was more hurt than angry. She died much too young at 59 and every day I wish I was more like her. Enjoy the good times with your mom as it is over all too soon.

WalkInMyShoes wrote:Nice memories of your mother - she sounds like someone you don't easily forget! I remember pulling that "is that all the presents there are?" and it didn't go over very well, but I think my mom was more hurt than angry. She died much too young at 59 and every day I wish I was more like her. Enjoy the good times with your mom as it is over all too soon.

Thank you for that, dear. Parents can't help but be hurt just like kids can't help but ask, "is that all there is?" We are kids, we had no idea about bills, and taxes and high prices, right? And yes, 59 is VERY young, I am sorry. But, I will "enjoy the good times" as I know you are. L

Happy Birthday Mom! Hope your kids score you maximum product!

Happy Birthday to Lorrie's Mom!

MBPL wrote:

WalkInMyShoes wrote:Nice memories of your mother - she sounds like someone you don't easily forget! I remember pulling that "is that all the presents there are?" and it didn't go over very well, but I think my mom was more hurt than angry. She died much too young at 59 and every day I wish I was more like her. Enjoy the good times with your mom as it is over all too soon.

Thank you for that, dear. Parents can't help but be hurt just like kids can't help but ask, "is that all there is?" We are kids, we had no idea about bills, and taxes and high prices, right? And yes, 59 is VERY young, I am sorry. But, I will "enjoy the good times" as I know you are. L

Lorrie, my cousin took care of my aunt who had dementia and Parkinson's too. It was very sad to watch her deteriorate. But the children and spouses who take care of them are special too, b/c it is hard being the caretaker for such a combination of diseases. My aunt eventually had to go into a nursing home b/c it became too much for my cousin doing it alone as her mom's symptoms became worse. So a very happy birthday to your mom, and she's lucky to have a daughter like you who truly cares about her and her wellbeing.

A few weeks before my mother died, my sister and I were raising hell with one of her oncologists about a mistake we thought was made in medication by his office, thus my mom was in increased pain unecessarily, and he told us our mother was so lucky to have us, b/c he sees it happen all too often where adult children aren't involved and don't want to be burdened and have to deal with taking care of their parents when they become very ill.

Jana wrote:

MBPL wrote:

WalkInMyShoes wrote:Nice memories of your mother - she sounds like someone you don't easily forget! I remember pulling that "is that all the presents there are?" and it didn't go over very well, but I think my mom was more hurt than angry. She died much too young at 59 and every day I wish I was more like her. Enjoy the good times with your mom as it is over all too soon.

Thank you for that, dear. Parents can't help but be hurt just like kids can't help but ask, "is that all there is?" We are kids, we had no idea about bills, and taxes and high prices, right? And yes, 59 is VERY young, I am sorry. But, I will "enjoy the good times" as I know you are. L

Lorrie, my cousin took care of my aunt who had dementia and Parkinson's too. It was very sad to watch her deteriorate. But the children and spouses who take care of them are special too, b/c it is hard being the caretaker for such a combination of diseases. My aunt eventually had to go into a nursing home b/c it became too much for my cousin doing it alone as her mom's symptoms became worse. So a very happy birthday to your mom, and she's lucky to have a daughter like you who truly cares about her and her wellbeing.

A few weeks before my mother died, my sister and I were raising hell with one of her oncologists about a mistake we thought was made in medication by his office, thus my mom was in increased pain unecessarily, and he told us our mother was so lucky to have us, b/c he sees it happen all too often where adult children aren't involved and don't want to be burdened and have to deal with taking care of their parents when they become very ill.

Thank you everyone for sharing. It means a lot to hear people offer what they are going through, helps me feel I am not alone. I am in pain right now, but that is all I need to say. It is the reason I have not written much. Who isn't going through things, right?

Hey, I have a video showing how I tormented my family yesterday at the place where mom is now housed. I will add it to my original post maybe tonight or tomorrow.

I am sorry about your mom and I agree with the doc. There is nothing wrong with being that raging bitch asking all the questions and making sure mom is fine. You kidding? My mom was one of those neurotic parents with me and my bro, so why not return the favor? And I was also told by docs that mom is lucky have to us being so concerned. Makes me sick to think of parents whose kids do not care about them. Thank you all for that. I feel a little better now. L

... then she snapped, "there are no batteries, you'll have to wait until tomorrow because your mother forgot to buy them, dammit all to hell! I don't know why they don't put those things inside the toys in the first damned place. You didn't hear your mother curse and if you repeat it you will be spanked!" Then one of us asked, "how come Santa didn't get more toys?" And that's when mom delivered....

"Because Santa Claus is a short, near-sighted black woman with one paycheck!"



Hope 2010 is better for all of us! Sweet and lovely pic of your family, Lorrie--happy birthday to your Mom, too!

fredinator wrote:... then she snapped, "there are no batteries, you'll have to wait until tomorrow because your mother forgot to buy them, dammit all to hell! I don't know why they don't put those things inside the toys in the first damned place. You didn't hear your mother curse and if you repeat it you will be spanked!" Then one of us asked, "how come Santa didn't get more toys?" And that's when mom delivered....

"Because Santa Claus is a short, near-sighted black woman with one paycheck!"



Hope 2010 is better for all of us! Sweet and lovely pic of your family, Lorrie--happy birthday to your Mom, too!

Very kind of you, thank you.

If you're not too squeamish about watching sentimental family crap on video done by strangers, then please do enjoy.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PlCyR1jFFY8
BIRTHDAY VIDEO