MR

*** Adult Truths ***

1. I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.

2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.

3. I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.

4. There is great need for a sarcasm font.

5. How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?

6. Was learning cursive really necessary?

7. Map Quest really needs to start their directions on # 5. I'm pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood. (Most days)

8. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.

9. I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.

10. Bad decisions make good stories.

11. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.

12. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray? I don't want to have to restart my collection...again.

13. I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten-page technical report that I swear I did not make any changes to.

14. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.

15. I think the freezer deserves a light as well.

16. I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lite than Kay.

17. I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid Ghetto" routing option.

18. I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.

19. How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear or understand a word they said?

20. I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars team up to prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers and sisters!

21. Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty, and you can wear them forever.

22. Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.

23. Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey - but I'd bet everyone can find and push the snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time, every time.

24. The first testicular guard, the "Cup," was used in Hockey in 1874 and the first helmet was used in 1974. That means it only took 100 years for men to realize that their brain is also important !!!

#5 is hilarious! I watched that Martha F. Stewart fold one once and she made it look like a perfect square like a flat sheet! I usually just quasi-fold it and throw it in the closet and say "F*ck it!"

Does #17 apply to ST John or what?

Rockindeano wrote:Does #17 apply to ST John or what?

Actually I thought #2 did.

#12 What is Blue Ray ? oh you mean Bluray !
Well Bluray is the last physical media, so no worries about starting a new collection!
The next step is called Ultra Violet and its all based on digital HD media. I say by 2020 DVDs/blurays/cds are as popular as cassettes and vinyl !

1. I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.

Forget about clearing history, how about smashing the computer to 5,000 pieces like Gallagher!

2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.

Point taken. My girlfriend knows my stubbornish all too well. I'll try to stear the conversation into my favor even when I know I'm wrong and will have a little smirk while doing so. She HATES it.

4. There is great need for a sarcasm font.

My second language is sarcasm. Sometimes takes over my first language!

6. Was learning cursive really necessary?

EXACTLY! All it did was make my hand hurt. I write in all caps BTW, there was no class for that.

8. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.

Obituaries are fun on the shitter, is that wrong?

10. Bad decisions make good stories.

I can't tell you how many times I've said "but look on the bright side, it'll be a fuckin GREAT story 5 years from now!" followed up by "you're right!" to ease the personal pain, haha.

14. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.

Ahhhh, touche'! And there's always an excuse next time you see them in person! "Sorry dude, was at my dead Grandma's house eating dinner at 3 in the afternoon!"

18. I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.

Sometimes I set up to be bored just so I can eat a whole bag of Salt and Vinegar chips and the leftover spaghetti in the refrigerator.

19. How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear or understand a word they said?

Agreeing with somebody is the key to all of life. Sometimes I don't even know what people are even talking about and I just smile and like "EXACTLY what I said!"

22. Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.

GREAT George Carlin skit on this!

Anyone else carry a handfull of full plastic grocery bags out to the car in your right hand only to realize your car keys are in your right pocket. Then the next time carry the bags in your left hand to find your keys are in your left pocket? Then Repeat.

Uncanny. I'm an idiot. Yes I'm an idiot. Just fixed post.

#23 describes me perfectly!!!

Deb wrote:

Rockindeano wrote:Does #17 apply to ST John or what?

Actually I thought #2 did.

How many people had to scroll back and forth to read #17 and then #2??

Angel wrote:

Deb wrote:

Rockindeano wrote:Does #17 apply to ST John or what?

Actually I thought #2 did.

How many people had to scroll back and forth to read #17 and then #2??

I did twice.

ebake02 wrote:

Angel wrote:

Deb wrote:

Rockindeano wrote:Does #17 apply to ST John or what?

Actually I thought #2 did.

How many people had to scroll back and forth to read #17 and then #2??

I did twice.

Me too, then I had to scroll back and read #23, thanks to you!!

Angel wrote:

ebake02 wrote:

Angel wrote:

Deb wrote:

Rockindeano wrote:Does #17 apply to ST John or what?

Actually I thought #2 did.

How many people had to scroll back and forth to read #17 and then #2??

I did twice.

Me too, then I had to scroll back and read #23, thanks to you!!

Your welcome!

ebake02 wrote:Your welcome!

No, the welcome is not mine.

YoungJRNY wrote:Point taken. My girlfriend knows my stubbornish all too well. I'll try to stear the conversation into my favor even when I know I'm wrong and will have a little smirk while doing so. She HATES it.

Um, dude, it's "steer" not "stear," but of coarse you already knew that.

Funny stuff. I was just saying #5 the other day! (been saying it for years and finally thought about looking online - but didn't).

Deb wrote:

Rockindeano wrote:Does #17 apply to ST John or what?

Actually I thought #2 did.

I laughed the hardest at #17 too and if that one applies most to StJohn, now I'm worried.