MR

My youngest kid went off to college today - sort of.....
She, like her sister, is attending Arizona State University on a full-ride academic scholarship (Thank God!!!) And even though we live only 10 miles from campus, she decided she wanted to live on campus in the dorms which, BTW, have come a LONG way since my college days, let me tell ya! In the past 5 years ASU has built 5 huge new dorms and has refurbished nearly all of the others including the addition of mini-kitchens in every dorm room (each dorm room is basically a 2-bdrm. apt. with 2 students per bdrm.) Wi-Fi enabled everything (The entire city of Tempe is Wi-Fi accessible for free), private bathrooms shared by only the 2 students in that dorm room - That alone is a major departure from my college days! Ohhhh the humanity of those community bathrooms on any given floor!!!!

12,000 students are moving in between yesterday and tomorrow and I gotta tell ya, they have this process down to an amazing science! You arrive at your assigned time at the campus' arena. The student gets out and goes through the check-in process. Meanwhile, a team of volunteers unloads your vehicle while yet another volunteer with tablet in-hand collects your student's ID #. They pull up the student's dorm and room number which is given to the team and whoosh! away they go with the student's belongings. You are then instructed where to go to park and how to get to the student's room. By the time you get there, your kid and their belongings are already there and you're done! The entire process, from the time I pulled up until I was at my daughter's room.... 20 mins.! Unbelievable! And, they're checking in 350 students per hour!! Impressive!

So, with the youngest now moved out, for all intents and purposes, my wife and I are back to just the two of us which we have been looking forward to for a while now. And, of course the wife is taking it a bit harder than I am what with this daughter being the baby and all but we're both looking forward to the peace and freakin' quiet if nothing else! And if I never have to smell the odor that radiates from a hair straightener again it will be too soon!!!

Just curious if anyone else here has experienced the "empty nest" situation recently and if it was anything/everything you thought it would be.

Fact Finder wrote:Good luck. 6 years ago we moved our last of 3 out to College. I believe we have moved her at least 4 times since then, to various apartments in the UC/Cincy area neighborhoods. Well guess what happened last week. SHES BACK!

I basically flatly refused to lift a finger except for the couch and 2 other bulky items, sewing machine mounted in a cabinet and a desk. Her and her mom did the rest. I didn't even go to her old place once, I'm like call your friends, load it and get it here.

Now she's filled my fridge and pantry with all of this tofu, tempe, salads and organic crap and I can't find my beer.

How did we ever raise 3 of these and I didn't kill one?

Ahhhh the wisdom and limericks of those who have gone before me..... I can understand your refusal to help lug her shit in/out, back/forth, up/down, over and over again. That one was established waaaaaaaay early in our marriage. My wife knows when it comes to bigger things (furn. etc.) a fair amount of thought needs to be put into its transportation and ultimate destination because I'm only gonna be getting intimate with it once! Thankfully, that has always been respected by her and even got passed on to the girls as they were growing up so they know once Dad moves it the first time - which I'm happy to do, even if stairs are involved - but after that..... you're on your own Bitch!

The oldest is now a Junior and has been moved out for 2 full years July 1st. She works fulltime and goes to school fulltime and has a nice little apt. halfway between her job and school. She's the super independent one of the two and I'd be surprised if she ever wanted/needed to move back home. Shit, she's here every God damned day anyway!!!
The younger one is a different story. She hasn't gotten a grip on self-reliance, deadlines, responsibilities, etc. quite yet so thank God her first venture into adulthood and being semi-self sufficient comes with the buffer of having a dorm which is already paid for as well as her meal program through the entire year so even if she completely fails at the adult part of managing her existence, she will still have a place to live and food to eat that won't involve a combination of her, my house, my food, and my sanity! Hopefully by this time next year she'll have most of the kinks and dumb-decisions worked out to a large extent - as well as a job..... so she can start the transition into the real world of adulthood without too many face plants.

As soon as the youngest turned 18, I asked myself that same question about not killing one of them! There were a few times I seriously weighed the differences between prison and just walking away and calming down - Truth!!
Here's one that stands out in my mind vividly and my oldest and I were just talking about it and laughing the other day.

When she was about 7 or 8, she took a big jar of sweet pickles out of the fridge with wet hands and immediately dropped it on the tile floor - brand fucking new jar. The jar shattered, juice went all over Hell and back, scared the piss out of the dog who was also in the kitchen, and to top it off, she was barefoot! Luckily she didn't get cut and was smart enough to not move but to call for help - which was already on its way due to the huge crash which had just occurred. "Sorry Daddy..... I'll clean it up!!" Yeah right! This was going to require a broom, lots of hot soapy water, a vacuum, and the experience of someone who is familiar with sticky spills - that'd be Dad of course. So, I lift her out of the kitchen, pissed at what happened due to carelessness and even more pissed that everything in my world had just come to a halt so I could tend to this mini-disaster - but I didn't go off on her, I kept my cool.
Half hour later.....
I've now swept up the pickles and glass and have mopped the floor with super hot water and floor cleaner and all that's left is to vacuum to be sure there's no glass remaining. So, I fire up the shop-vac and go to town. About 30 seconds into it, she's behind me tugging on my shirt with her hands over her ears. I shut down the vac and not-so-nicely ask, "WHAT?!" She pulls her hands from her ears and says while pointing into the family room which is adjacent to the kitchen...... "I can't hear the TV" Had she been a boy and not my little girl, I'm pretty sure I would have launched her through the family room, and the wall behind said TV!

Fact Finder wrote:Her and her mom did the rest. I didn't even go to her old place once, I'm like call your friends, load it and get it here.
How did we ever raise 3 of these and I didn't kill one?

I would have clocked you in the cock........seriously, shut up

JRNYMAN you can cover your Kahoonas as well, I wanna kick you both in the cobblestones.

Moon Beam wrote:JRNYMAN you can cover your Kahoonas as well, I wanna kick you both in the cobblestones.

"Cock, Kahoonas, cobblestones..." I don't know whether to be scared or turned-on!
C'mon now. You know we're both posturing to some extent. Fact is we were talking about our little girls and you know how daddies are about their little girls.... They grow up to be cunning little runts - just like their mothers!!! Bwaaaaahahahaha!!!

JRNYMAN wrote:

Moon Beam wrote:JRNYMAN you can cover your Kahoonas as well, I wanna kick you both in the cobblestones.

"Cock, Kahoonas, cobblestones..." I don't know whether to be scared or turned-on!
C'mon now. You know we're both posturing to some extent. Fact is we were talking about our little girls and you know how daddies are about their little girls.... They grow up to be cunning little runts - just like their mothers!!! Bwaaaaahahahaha!!!

Cunning little runts?, I saw right through that.

JRNYMAN wrote: Fact is we were talking about our little girls and you know how daddies are about their little girls....

Translation: Inside my tough exterior is a big softie who is wrapped around my daughter's finger and hangs on her every want and need. Your not fooling anyone.

ebake02 wrote:

JRNYMAN wrote: Fact is we were talking about our little girls and you know how daddies are about their little girls....

Translation: Inside my tough exterior is a big softie who is wrapped around my daughter's finger and hangs on her every want and need. Your not fooling anyone.

Yeah, for the most part. But, that's not to say there aren't certain things/topics which have no wiggle room whatsoever and I have never let slide. And the cool thing about those kinds of issues is that as my kids have gotten older, they have come to hold them just as important in their respective lives and social circles. For instance, littering is a biggie. It's never been encouraged, tolerated or condoned by me or my wife. Our kids know where we stand on the issue as well as the reasons why it's important. The coolest part is that in the past couple of years, we've seen it come full circle when one of both of them have called one of their friends out for littering - and not just a knee-jerk type of reaction to their friend's indiscretion but a full-on attitude and resentment for the friend even thinking of doing such a heinous thing! Sorta makes ya proud when you see something you've tried to teach them actually come shining through! Now, If I could only have that kind of success with whining, arguing, bitching, shameless ass-kissing in an attempt to gain or get something they really, really want...... Dadddddyyyyyyy pleeeeeeaaaasse.....!!!!