Hey Folks

by **cudaclan** » Sat Oct 20, 2007 5:37 am

The loss of innocence saddens us. May you and all be comforted.

by **RedWingFan** » Sat Oct 20, 2007 5:40 am

piecesofeight wrote:Long story, short, everytime I hear it, it puts me back at peace. Not the same as hearing it, but..I just heard this again a few minutes ago, and the second to the last paragraph really hit me.

Casting Crowns-

Great songs by a great band! All 3 of their cd's are must haves! If you like "East to West" I highly suggest you pick them up. You'll love them!

by **Marabelle** » Sat Oct 20, 2007 5:45 am

May the angels in heaven know something about what it is you feel
Let them sit down and listen, being absolutely still
For somewhere on Earth is born to them; another precious Angel
and they will take and cradle this child in their arms
and let him play in Heaven's fields forever

God Bless you and Lulu and your family. I wish tears could wash away pain and ease the hurt; but words can just soothe suffering; only time can heal.

by **fredinator** » Sat Oct 20, 2007 5:46 am

Dean, you will just have to try and pull yourself together now for Lula and Wyatt. You all did everything you could for Trevor and he tried hard. Honor his memory by being as strong as you can for your family--your pain is unimaginable really, but if you can just put one foot in front of the other you will get through the next few days. If it gets unbearable, please call one of us or a crisis hotline and maybe get a social worker to help you all... Maybe just go to a church and ask for help. There is lots of help out there--call one of us and maybe we can find somebody out there to help you... You musn't give up.

by **piecesofeight** » Sat Oct 20, 2007 6:01 am

fredinator wrote:Dean, you will just have to try and pull yourself together now for Lula and Wyatt. You all did everything you could for Trevor and he tried hard. Honor his memory by being as strong as you can for your family--your pain is unimaginable really, but if you can just put one foot in front of the other you will get through the next few days. If it gets unbearable, please call one of us or a crisis hotline and maybe get a social worker to help you all... Maybe just go to a church and ask for help. There is lots of help out there--call one of us and maybe we can find somebody out there to help you... You musn't give up.

Your line about going to church and asking for help, hit a note to me from the past. Before I became a Christian...even thought I was an Atheist..I was at a very low point in my life......
I found myself ending up just sitting in churches, alone. Most churches are 'open' a lot when services aren't in service.
Most times, they won't bother you unless you want to talk, they will just let you sit there.
Dean, I don't know your beliefs, doesn't matter...but when I read your post again and how down you are, I've been there. I don't mean to preach, but the PEACE I felt when I was just sitting there alone, although I wasn't :wink:

, I never felt so much peace. I was alone though, you aren't. You have people in your life.
I just wanted to say that if you ever feel you need alone time to search for the peace, it worked for me.
Words cannot explain what I felt when I was just sitting there. PEACE is the best thing I can explain.

by **Blondie** » Sat Oct 20, 2007 6:04 am

piecesofeight wrote:I myself have been going through a lot lately, and while I am not a fan of much of the mellower Christian rock that's out there. When I have my cordless headphones on, I sometimes pick up a local Christian radio station when I'm out of range for what I am using the headphones for. I keep picking up this song and finally had to find out what it was.
Long story, short, everytime I hear it, it puts me back at peace. Not the same as hearing it, but..I just heard this again a few minutes ago, and the second to the last paragraph really hit me.

Casting Crowns-

Here I am Lord,
and I'm drowning
in your sea of forgetfulness
the chains of yesterday surround me
I yearn for peace and rest
I dont want to end up where you found me
and it echoes in my mind,
keeps me awake tonight

I know you cast my sin as far as the east is from the west
and I stand before you now,
as if I've never sinned
but today I feel like I'm just one mistake away
from you leaving me this way

and Jesus can you show me
just how far the east is from the west
cause I can't bear to see the man I've been
rising up in me again
in the arms of your mercy I find rest,
cause you know just how far the East is from the West
from one scarred hand to the other.

I start the day the war begins
endless reminding of my sin
time and time again your truth is drowned out
by the storm I'm in
today I feel like I'm just one mistake away,
from you leaving me this way and Jesus can you show me,
just how far the East is from the West
cause I can't bear to see the man I've been
rising up in me again
in the arms of your mercy I find rest
'cause you know
just how far the East is from the West
from one scarred hand to the other.

I know you've washed me white,
turned my darkness into light
I need your peace to get me through,
to get me through this night
can't live by what I feel
but by the Truth your Word reveals,
I'm not holding on to you
but you're holding on to me,
you're holding on to me

Jesus you know
just how far the East is from the West
I don't have to see the man I've been,
rising up in me again
in the arms of your mercy I find rest
'cause you know just how far the East is from the West,
just how far,
from one scarred hand to the other.

Those words from this song have helped me get through a whole lot lately. Please know that you are not alone and that there are many who will help hold you up.

by **piecesofeight** » Sat Oct 20, 2007 6:29 am

Blondie wrote:
piecesofeight wrote:I myself have been going through a lot lately, and while I am not a fan of much of the mellower Christian rock that's out there. When I have my cordless headphones on, I sometimes pick up a local Christian radio station when I'm out of range for what I am using the headphones for. I keep picking up this song and finally had to find out what it was.
Long story, short, everytime I hear it, it puts me back at peace. Not the same as hearing it, but..I just heard this again a few minutes ago, and the second to the last paragraph really hit me.

Casting Crowns-

Here I am Lord,
and I'm drowning
in your sea of forgetfulness
the chains of yesterday surround me
I yearn for peace and rest
I dont want to end up where you found me
and it echoes in my mind,
keeps me awake tonight

I know you cast my sin as far as the east is from the west
and I stand before you now,
as if I've never sinned
but today I feel like I'm just one mistake away
from you leaving me this way

and Jesus can you show me
just how far the east is from the west
cause I can't bear to see the man I've been
rising up in me again
in the arms of your mercy I find rest,
cause you know just how far the East is from the West
from one scarred hand to the other.

I start the day the war begins
endless reminding of my sin
time and time again your truth is drowned out
by the storm I'm in
today I feel like I'm just one mistake away,
from you leaving me this way and Jesus can you show me,
just how far the East is from the West
cause I can't bear to see the man I've been
rising up in me again
in the arms of your mercy I find rest
'cause you know
just how far the East is from the West
from one scarred hand to the other.

I know you've washed me white,
turned my darkness into light
I need your peace to get me through,
to get me through this night
can't live by what I feel
but by the Truth your Word reveals,
I'm not holding on to you
but you're holding on to me,
you're holding on to me

Jesus you know
just how far the East is from the West
I don't have to see the man I've been,
rising up in me again
in the arms of your mercy I find rest
'cause you know just how far the East is from the West,
just how far,
from one scarred hand to the other.

Those words from this song have helped me get through a whole lot lately. Please know that you are not alone and that there are many who will help hold you up.

this is the line that tears at me-

"'in the arms of your mercy I find rest '"

i just had to post this song in this thread because i have now heard it like three times today, without even trying. i know it helps me find PEACE.

by **Panther** » Sat Oct 20, 2007 7:35 am

So, so sorry for your loss Dean and Lu. As a twinless twin who lost a set of twins years ago, I feel your pain and loss. Your little man experienced more love in his so short life than many others find in a lifetime. Hold on to one another and your precious survivor and know that your little man will always be there with each step you take. Allow those that will, to take your hands and guide you through this dark and unimaginable time in your lives. Let them hold you up when you can no longer stand, let them carry you when you can no longer walk and let the love your little man got from you envelope you in the darkest moments. He would not want you to forget that joy you shared together.

Your precious family will be in our thoughts and prayers.

by **Rip Rokken** » Sat Oct 20, 2007 8:18 am

piecesofeight wrote:this is the line that tears at me-

"'in the arms of your mercy I find rest '"

i just had to post this song in this thread because i have now heard it like three times today, without even trying. i know it helps me find PEACE.

Here's a piece of one that does the same for me, from the song "Angel" off of Inhabited's CD "The Revolution" -- this is actually my favorite part of the whole disc, and really brings me peace when I'm down:

When you can't speak
He's listening
When you can't reach
You're never too far
When you're crying
He sees your tears
When you're alone
Reach out. He is there
And He's looking for you
Just reach out

Here is a MP3 sample of the song: http://dbmedia.crossrhythms.co.uk/audio/mp3/14171-8.mp3

by **yak** » Sat Oct 20, 2007 8:38 am

Rockindeano wrote:Love your child like there is no tomorrow. Live each and everyday like it is the last. I have never felt pain like this in my lifetime and honestly do not know if I can handle it. I am in a deep dark place and for the firrst time in my life, I have no idea of what to do. I am clueless. That is one of the reasons I posted here; I need direction, I need to know there is life worthy of living, worthy of waking up daily and going about the day.

Pray, Dean. God loves YOU. He is waiting to hear from you...in all your grief...and in all your pain...and in all your anger...He is waiting.

Blessed are the pure in heart: for they shall see God. (Matthew 5:8 )

I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me. (Philippians 4:13 KJV)

Therefore humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you at the proper time, casting all your anxiety on Him, because He cares for you. (1 Peter 5:6-7)

by **piecesofeight** » Sat Oct 20, 2007 8:41 am

RipRokken wrote:
piecesofeight wrote:this is the line that tears at me-

"'in the arms of your mercy I find rest '"

i just had to post this song in this thread because i have now heard it like three times today, without even trying. i know it helps me find PEACE.

Here's a piece of one that does the same for me, from the song "Angel" off of Inhabited's CD "The Revolution" -- this is actually my favorite part of the whole disc, and really brings me peace when I'm down:

When you can't speak
He's listening
When you can't reach
You're never too far
When you're crying
He sees your tears
When you're alone
Reach out. He is there
And He's looking for you
Just reach out

Here is a MP3 sample of the song: http://dbmedia.crossrhythms.co.uk/audio/mp3/14171-8.mp3

Good stuff. Whenever I hear the words 'Reach Out' I think of either Stryper's 'Reach Out' or this one by Petra, which is in my mind one of their best, and there are many.

Just Reach Out

Words and music by John Schlitt and Rick Gootee
Based on Psalm 34:16-18, Romans 10:9-13

Sometimes the night seems to go on for days
When it's hard to see the light through the darkness and haze
While the world around you makes you feel out of place
And the burdens that you carry are just too hard to face

(Chorus)
Just reach out and He'll reach in
Take your broken heart and make it whole again
It don't matter who you are or where you've been
Just reach out, and He'll reach in

Standing in a crowd, but still all alone
Crying out for answers that nobody knows
Everybody's busy looking out for themselves
Is there anyone who really cares about anyone else?

You say you've walked ten thousand steps away
But don't you know that it's only one step back?
Because the One who hears you when you pray
Is the One who's there beside you
And He'll never walk away

http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=H-7sSaS63OM

The words are amazing enough, but hearing it is even better.

by **johnroxx** » Sat Oct 20, 2007 9:00 am

Wow...Deano, I just don't know what to say, except I'm so very sorry.

Words escape me, which is not usually the case.

Good thoughts for strength and comfort going to you and Lula and Wyatt, and all close to you...

;^)

by **StoneCold** » Sat Oct 20, 2007 9:04 am

For both of you and all of your family, I'm very sorry for the loss of your child.

I lost the person closest to me and it took years to recover. For the first few months, nothing could make me happy about anything. All I felt was hopeless, angry and apathetic.

I know you don't think you can bear it but as others have posted, in time the pain will ease and you'll cherish the time you had with Trevor.

But you have to go on. Keeping busy and being around people I found to be helpful.

by **Moose** » Sat Oct 20, 2007 9:04 am

Dean and Lula, my deepest sympathy goes out to you. Losing a child is just an unspeakable tragedy.

by **Shadowsong** » Sat Oct 20, 2007 10:06 am

Trevor is like a shooting star
Came into your lives with something to say
A light on its way across the heavens
Just to be with you til he was on his way
Gracing your skies beyond the distance
Trevor shall live in your hearts forever.

by **Melissa** » Sat Oct 20, 2007 10:11 am

Just found out.....My heart is in absolute pain for you both. You are in our hearts & prayers.

All our prayers & love,
Melissa & Glen

by **StevePerryHair** » Sat Oct 20, 2007 10:12 am

I am so sorry for the pain you are going through in your loss. Just know that you are in my prayers and my heart goes out to all of you.

by **treetopovskaya** » Sat Oct 20, 2007 10:43 am

be strong deano... your family needs you now more then ever. when wyatt is old enough you have to be there to tell him about his brother... how he was such a fighter for someone so tiny. wyatt has his very own special guardian angel. hugs to you all.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VRsJlAJvOSM

by **FormerJrnyFan** » Sat Oct 20, 2007 10:51 am

Dean and Lula, I'm so very sorry... my deepest sympathies. May you both be comforted as you mourn the loss of your angel Trevor.

by **Triple S** » Sat Oct 20, 2007 10:57 am

Dean,

You are not alone. From all these wonderful posts, you obviously have the love, support and comfort of many people here – both those who know you and those who don’t (like me).

We can’t tell you how or what you should be feeling, but please, please find strength in the love of your friends and family. You, Lula and your beautiful little child Wyatt need each other.

When I lost someone I loved dearly a few years ago, I listened to this song over and over. It sometimes made me cry harder but more importantly made me believe that my loved one was still with me.

Josh Groban - To Where You Are
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6F6Ls4UQ ... ed&search=

My heartfelt condolences to all of you. Be strong.

by **JH'sTXfan** » Sat Oct 20, 2007 11:14 am

Dean,

In the days to come, take your little Wyatt outside into the sunshine and watch the sun sparkle in his
hair, watch the wind ruffle it gently. See the curiosity in his eyes, the way his little expressive
fingers are formed so beautifully. Kiss that little chubby cheek and hold him close to you.

Nothing will help you so much as pouring out your love to him and receiving back the love that
he will give to you.

See that God and your family all love you and need you, and that they are the reasons for you to go on.

Still praying for you guys.

by **(Crazy)Dulce Lady** » Sat Oct 20, 2007 11:52 am

Dean,
Please listen to me.

YOU are a mighty man. Created by God, in His image, an heir to the throne of God, a joint heir with Jesus your brother.

YOU possess all the power of our Almighty Father in HEAVEN. just ask Him.

(thanks IndyJoe-Wendy)

Isaiah 40:31 says,

"They that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength.

They will mount up with WINGS AS EAGLES.

They will run and not grow weary.

They will walk and not faint."

Is. 40:31

Look up Dean. Look up to heaven and see Trevor. Look up to Jesus and call for strength. Surrender to HIM and let HIM carry you and empower you with the same courage that Jesus had as he hung on the cross with our sins on Him. Honor Trevor and be a rock for Lula and Wyatt. YOU were meant for NOTHING less. In the name of Jesus, I lift you up, my brother, and claim all power and strength for you from our Father God in HEAVEN. In one mighty voice, we at MR hold our friends up to Jesus for comfort and healing. amen.

FOOTPRINTS IN THE SAND
(by Mary Stevenson)

One night a man had a dream. He dreamed he was
walking along the beach with the Lord. Across the
sky flashed scenes from his life. For each scene, he
noticed two sets of footprints in the sand: one
belonging to him, and the other to the Lord. When
the last scene of his life flashed before him, he
looked back at the footprints in the sand. He
noticed that many times along the path of his life
there was only one set of footprints. He also noticed
that it happened at the very lowest and saddest
times in his life. This really bothered him and he
questioned the Lord about it. "Lord, You said that
once I decided to follow you, You'd walk with me all
the way. But I have noticed that during the most
troublesome times in my life, there is only one set
of footprints. I don't understand why when I needed
you most you would leave me." The Lord replied,
"My son, My precious child, I love you and I would
never leave you. During your times of trial and
suffering, when you see only one set of footprints, it
was then that I Carried You."

love you soooooooo much,

Debbie

by **Indyjoe** » Sat Oct 20, 2007 11:57 am

(Crazy)Dulce Lady wrote:Look up Dean. Look up to heaven and see Trevor. Look up to Jesus and call for strength. Surrender to HIM and let HIM carry you and empower you with the same courage that Jesus had as he hung on the cross with our sins on Him. Honor Trevor and be a rock for Lula and Wyatt. YOU were meant for NOTHING less. In the name of Jesus, I lift you up, my brother, and claim all power and strength for you from our Father God in HEAVEN. In one mighty voice, we at MR hold our friends up to Jesus for comfort and healing. amen.

Debbie

Amen

~Wendy and John

by **squirt1** » Sat Oct 20, 2007 12:17 pm

To both of you- There are no words adequate or a bigger sorrow than when a child dies. I tell you this with all my heart that he is in heaven. I have experienced proof of this after a relative died. Afterlife is real. Need anything, just ask !

by **Shadowsong** » Sat Oct 20, 2007 12:33 pm

Rockindeano wrote:Love your child like there is no tomorrow. Live each and everyday like it is the last. I have never felt pain like this in my lifetime and honestly do not know if I can handle it. I am in a deep dark place and for the firrst time in my life, I have no idea of what to do. I am clueless. That is one of the reasons I posted here; I need direction, I need to know there is life worthy of living, worthy of waking up daily and going about the day.

You will always have 2 sons.
One who came through like a comet
His light yopu could never contain
One who upon you depends
to walk with him in this place
Do not FALL INTO THE DARKNESS
Trevor is in the company of angels
A immortal light his love he sends
To shine down upon you all to light the way

by AR » Sat Oct 20, 2007 12:46 pm

To anyone sending checks, we've been asked to send them in Lula's name. If you've already mailed one addressed to Dean, no problem.

We've gotten this off the ground quickly and on the fly, so to speak. But address any checks to Louise Cummings from this point forward. That will be reflected on the upcoming webpage.

Ed

by **piecesofeight** » Sat Oct 20, 2007 12:46 pm

Mercy Came Running

Phillips, Craig & Dean

Once there was a holy place
Evidence of God's embrace
And I can almost see mercy's face
Pressed against the veil
Looking down with longing eyes
Mercy must have realized
That once His blood was sacrificed
Freedom would prevail
And as the sky grew dark
And the earth began to shake
With justice no longer in the way

Chorus
Mercy came running
Like a prisoner set free
Past all my failures to the point of my need
When the sin that I carried
Was all I could see
And when I could not reach mercy
Mercy came running to me

Once there was a broken heart
Way too human from the start
And all the years left torn apart
Hopeless and afraid
Walls I never meant to build
Left this prisoner unfulfilled
Freedom called but even still
It seemed so far away

I was bound by the chains
From the wages of my sin
Just when I felt like giving in

Chorus

Bridge
Sometimes I still feel so far
So far from where I really should be
He gently calls to my heart
Just to remind me

by **odessa** » Sat Oct 20, 2007 12:56 pm

Dean and Lula,

I cannot begin to express the sympathy and sadness I feel for you. I know there are no words that can mend your broken heart or heal your pain. No parent should have to go through the death of a child or witness the horrifying experience that you two did. I am so sorry to hear of this terrible news.

They say time heals all wounds, but I don't believe that. This is an event you will never ever recover from. In time you will learn to cope, but the sadness will always be there. Please grieve and use the ability to communicate with others as much as possible. You will be in a dark place right now, that is understandable, but please DO NOT SHUT DOWN or give up on life. You need not feel that you are alone, you are not. You and Lula have the love and support of many friends and strangers from around the world.

Trevor was a very special little boy and he had the chance to touch many lives in the brief time he visited this earth. Not too many children have the love and support of many strangers from around the world, so his life was not spent in vain. Trevor's life purpose was to remind us that although this world is filled with many ugly things, there still is beauty and innocence and we should cherish those gifts before we loose them. He knows he is loved and he will always know that his parents love him more than anything in the world.

One day you two will be reunited, but for now, God needed him and God has a plan for you. Please know that although the body dies, the soul never does. Trevor is still with you- although not in the flesh. He will never leave you. Please believe that.

Again, my sincere condolences to you and Lula. You will remain in my thoughts and prayers

by **piecesofeight** » Sat Oct 20, 2007 1:12 pm

Stryper

You Won't Be Lonely

Won't you open up your heart and let me come inside.
Please let the loving start to climb.
I know you may may wonder why I've come to hold you tight.
I don't want you to cry tonight.
I will take you in my arms and sing your favorite song.
As I tell you of your charms all night long.
You've been hurt over again, with all my love I say I am
Holding out my hand.

(Chorus)
You won't be lonely anymore.
You won't be lonely anymore.
For so long you've been in rain, but now you're warm and dry.
You've been through all the pain and now it's blue skies.
You'll be happy and secure as long as you are mine and as
Long as I am yours.

(Chorus)

Won't you open up your heart and let me come inside.
Please let the loving start to climb.
I will take you in my arms and I will hold you tight.
You won't be lonely tonight.

by **SacredEyes** » Sat Oct 20, 2007 1:17 pm

Rockindeano wrote:
Jeremey wrote:Dean & Lula,

Sabrina & I were shocked and horrified to read your post yesterday. Our prayers were sent up for your family and your little one last night, and you have our deepest sympathy. Take care of yourselves and little Wyatt, and know that you have friends around the world supporting you during this time of loss.

Jeremey & Sabrina

Dean,

The hole in my chest actually felt like wind or water could blow directly through me. Automatic pilot with only pain as an operating system. Don't deny yourself the time to cry or break down. I was so, so angry at God. I'm not trying to deny His ongoing presence in my life but it took a great deal of time because what God does this? When you are ready, He will be ready. I remember going to church to yell at the pulpit. You can say that your child is in a better place but what better place is there than its mommy and daddy's arms. I wanted to march up to Heaven and demand an answer "Why Him?"

Don't put a timetable to this. There is not one. One child does not replace the other.

Without any doubt in my mind, Aiden taught me more about living through his death than any living person that I know.

Sending angel kisses skyward......

MR

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