Best Simpsons / Family Guy quotes

by **7 Wishes** » Tue Jan 29, 2008 2:36 pm

"Alan Thicke will be up next to answer your hate mail..."

by **bluejeangirl76** » Tue Jan 29, 2008 2:44 pm

My total favorite...

"I am evil hooo-MER, I am evil hooo-MER..."

by **StoneCold** » Tue Jan 29, 2008 2:54 pm

Feel free to say no to this, but ....

would you shave my coin purse?

by **X factor** » Tue Jan 29, 2008 7:20 pm

"There's nary an animal alive that can outrun a greased Scotsman!"

by **Saint John** » Tue Jan 29, 2008 7:24 pm

I have never watched one episode of either show. :shock:

by **mikemarrs** » Tue Jan 29, 2008 8:04 pm

people might laugh but i have watched the simpsons a few times but never a single episode of family guy until here recently...call me out of touch or whatever but when i think of cartoons i think of stuff like flintstones,tom and jerry,etc, you get the picture.well i let me three year old and two year old watch family guy every day a couple weeks ago while i did stuff around the house.i almost had a heart attack the other day when i finally sat down and watched this stuff.i immediately made my toddlers quit watching family guy.they threw a fit but whatever.that is a cartoon for teens and grown ups.

by **Andrew** » Tue Jan 29, 2008 8:42 pm

Best Homer voice:

Mmmmmmmmmm....Journey.

by **Blueskies** » Tue Jan 29, 2008 9:03 pm

Andrew wrote:Best Homer voice:

Mmmmmmmmmm....Journey.

Thanks for the first laugh of the day, Andrew!

by **Rockindeano** » Wed Jan 30, 2008 1:21 am

Family Guy-

Talk show host-"Welcome to KISS talk. Go ahead caller."

Caller- "Yeah KISS sucks"

Peter Griffin- "Trace the call trace the call!"

Show host- "Hey I recognize that voice! Hey it's dennis DeYoung of Styx...ha ya high pitched bastard. How about we compare Detroit Rock City with Come Sail Away"!!!!!!"

by **Behshad** » Wed Jan 30, 2008 1:28 am

Few Homer ones I like:

Bart, a woman is like beer. They look good, they smell good, and you'd step over your own mother just to get one!

Do I know what rhetorical means?

Don't eat me. I have a wife and kids. Eat them

by **cyndy!** » Wed Jan 30, 2008 1:47 am

D'oh!

by **Rockindeano** » Wed Jan 30, 2008 2:15 am

And you wonder why people think you are so mysterious Cyn. :wink:

by **7 Wishes** » Wed Jan 30, 2008 2:18 am

"I'm the last remaining Democrat in America! TAX AND SPEND! Tax and spend! Yippee!!!"

by **larryfromnextdoor** » Wed Jan 30, 2008 2:33 am

homer and family running down the street looking for a guy,,, they find out that the guy had been drinking beer sitting on some steps..........

they walk up and their are 6 empty Zima bottles...

Homer-" theres 3 men"
marge-"how can you tell"
homer-"no man can drink over 2 Zimas"

for some reason that episode was funny to me.. that was 15 years ago..

by **larryfromnextdoor** » Wed Jan 30, 2008 2:37 am

Duckman was as good as the Simpson and Family Guy for a year or so...

Duckman: Did I ever tell you my Dad's last words to me?
Cornfed: "Careful, son, I don't think the safety is on."
Duckman: Before that.

by **Rhiannon** » Wed Jan 30, 2008 2:43 am

The scene from the episode where Peter finds out his house isn't a part of the US and decides to claim his own country, Petoria, umm... "Can't Touch Me".

:lol:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rCIaDINJcfc

by **NealIsGod** » Wed Jan 30, 2008 2:45 am

The creepy old man on Family Guy never fails to crack me up. Here's his "Best of" vid.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7wf7Ngb51B4

by **Diffworlds** » Wed Jan 30, 2008 3:05 am

Ralph Wiggum: "Me fail english. That unpossible!"

by **Rhiannon** » Wed Jan 30, 2008 3:08 am

Peter: "Brian, there's a message in my Alpha-Bits, it says, 'Oooooo'."
Brian: "Peter, those are Cheerios."

Meg: "And did you know that Sweeden also gave us the brilliant inventor, Alfred Nobel?"
Peter: "Which is more than we ever got from those free-loading Canadians. .... Canada sucks."

Lois: "When I think back to all the food we've wasted in this house."
Peter: (At the TV, spoon-feeding the screen) "Here Tom Selleck, c'mon, down the hatch."

Peter: "This is more intense than that time I forgot how to sit down."

by **NealIsGod** » Wed Jan 30, 2008 3:09 am

Diffworlds wrote:Ralph Wiggum: "Me fail english. That unpossible!"

That kid has some great lines. :lol:

by **Rhiannon** » Wed Jan 30, 2008 3:17 am

NealIsGod wrote:
Diffworlds wrote:Ralph Wiggum: "Me fail english. That unpossible!"

That kid has some great lines.

Best Ralph Wiggum line EVER was when a wolf kidnapped him or something and as the wolf is running along with Ralph in it's mouth he goes:

"You smell like dead bunnies." :lol:

by **NealIsGod** » Wed Jan 30, 2008 3:18 am

Rhiannon wrote:
NealIsGod wrote:
Diffworlds wrote:Ralph Wiggum: "Me fail english. That unpossible!"

That kid has some great lines.

Best Ralph Wiggum line EVER was when a wolf kidnapped him or something and as the wolf is running along with Ralph in it's mouth he goes:

"You smell like dead bunnies."

Or when he proclaimed "My cat's breath smells like cat food."

by **Rhiannon** » Wed Jan 30, 2008 3:24 am

This Homer quote reminds me of a few people I know. :lol:

"How could you?! Haven't you learned anything from that guy who gives those sermons at church? Captain Whatshisname? We live in a society of laws! Why do you think I took you to all those Police Academy movies? For fun? Well, I didn't hear anybody laughing, did you? Except at that guy who made sound effects. Makes sound effects and laughs. Where was I? Oh yeah! Stay out of my booze."

by **bluejeangirl76** » Wed Jan 30, 2008 3:28 am

Diffworlds wrote:Ralph Wiggum: "Me fail english. That unpossible!"

Omg, Ralph Wiggum... we could be here all day with those...

"Tastes like burning!"

by **Rhiannon** » Wed Jan 30, 2008 3:31 am

bluejeangirl76 wrote:
Diffworlds wrote:Ralph Wiggum: "Me fail english. That unpossible!"

Omg, Ralph Wiggum... we could be here all day with those...

"Tastes like burning!"

"The doctor said I wouldn't have so many nose bleeds if I kept my finger outta there..."

by **yulog** » Wed Jan 30, 2008 3:31 am

http://www.ebaumsworld.com/soundboards/play/1848 I almost got fired for using this on several big wigs where i used to work, they called the cops especially after using the "my god your greasy"

by **Arkansas** » Wed Jan 30, 2008 3:38 am

Stewie Griffin is a personal hero of mine.
The smart-a$$ kid in me forces me to watch 'Family Guy' as much as I can.
I went through the Simpsons, and then through South Park, but now I'm stuck on this.
Even have a lot of their stuff.

http://search.ebay.com/search/search.dl ... category0=

later~

by **fightingilliniJRNY** » Wed Jan 30, 2008 4:08 am

Saint John wrote:I have never watched one episode of either show.

Me neither. Glad I'm not the only one.

by **ProgRocker53** » Wed Jan 30, 2008 4:09 am

fightingilliniJRNY wrote:
Saint John wrote:I have never watched one episode of either show.

Me neither. Glad I'm not the only one.

You guys are missing out! Some hilarious material on all of these shows.

by **bluejeangirl76** » Wed Jan 30, 2008 4:15 am

fightingilliniJRNY wrote:
Saint John wrote:I have never watched one episode of either show.

Me neither. Glad I'm not the only one.

I recently said something to one of my sisters about having just seen The Simpsons Movie and she said "What is Simpsons?" I went like this --> :shock:

I mean even those who've never seen it have at least heard of it, no? LOL! I was shocked.

MR

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