Funniest thing I've read in ages.

[Arianddu]

http://audreyowen.wordpress.com/

One can only hope the date originally posted is a huge clue.

Puts a whole new spin on 'basking in the glow'.

[Sarah]

[Suzanne]

Sarah- that's what I said after the first few lines. I need a good laugh today so I think I'll read this later when I get caught up at work. Thanks for posting it Ari.

[lindalut]

Too funny

[cinkidd]

Just wow. Let it be known that I have never taken a shot of the "glow" nor do I intend to, drugs are just bad, ask the doctor in the story and sure that is all the verification that you would need. On the other hand if this were true (complete load of glow) I probably would take a shot or thousand to have a chance to sing just a few lines like Perry, oh my.

Rich the Glow Guy

[Rockindeano]

Hey, before you all "laugh" at her, look in the mirror. With the exception of Sarah, who is the most sane "Loon" here, the rest of you are much more fucked up than this Blogger. I have read stuff here that makes this blogger read like Peggy Noonan. Let's be clear, the lot of you are really nice gals, quality people, BUT to say you aren't all fucked up in the dome when it comes to Perry would be wrong; you scare the shit out of me. I can only wonder what Stephen feels like. The poor bastard probably spend his days in the fetal position hunkered down in his walk in closet, trembling in extreme fear.

[Ehwmatt]

Hey, before you all "laugh" at her, look in the mirror. With the exception of Sarah, who is the most sane "Loon" here, the rest of you are much more fucked up than this Blogger. I have read stuff here that makes this blogger read like Peggy Noonan. Let's be clear, the lot of you are really nice gals, quality people, BUT to say you aren't all fucked up in the dome when it comes to Perry would be wrong; you scare the shit out of me. I can only wonder what Stephen feels like. The poor bastard probably spend his days in the fetal position hunkered down in his walk in closet, trembling in extreme fear.

Ditto

[bluejeangirl76]

Every publisher I showed it to rejected it;

Noooooo. Really?

[steveo777]

Hey, before you all "laugh" at her, look in the mirror. With the exception of Sarah, who is the most sane "Loon" here, the rest of you are much more fucked up than this Blogger. I have read stuff here that makes this blogger read like Peggy Noonan. Let's be clear, the lot of you are really nice gals, quality people, BUT to say you aren't all fucked up in the dome when it comes to Perry would be wrong; you scare the shit out of me. I can only wonder what Stephen feels like. The poor bastard probably spend his days in the fetal position hunkered down in his walk in closet, trembling in extreme fear.

Spot on!

[Sarah]

With the exception of Sarah, who is the most sane "Loon" here, the rest of you are much more fucked up than this Blogger.

Why thank you, I've written my share of SP fanfic too, but at least I realize it sucked?

[ChildInTime]

That's one thing I don't get about fanfiction... I get why people write it, especially teenage/young women, but... why publish it anywhere? It seems like such an odd thing to want to show off.

[Jubilee]

Hey, before you all "laugh" at her, look in the mirror. With the exception of Sarah, who is the most sane "Loon" here, the rest of you are much more fucked up than this Blogger. I have read stuff here that makes this blogger read like Peggy Noonan. Let's be clear, the lot of you are really nice gals, quality people, BUT to say you aren't all fucked up in the dome when it comes to Perry would be wrong; you scare the shit out of me. I can only wonder what Stephen feels like. The poor bastard probably spend his days in the fetal position hunkered down in his walk in closet, trembling in extreme fear.

Puleeeze

Poor bastard? Poor bastard!?! If that poor 61 year-old bastard is curled up in the fetal position in his walk in closet (probably hiding under a pile of $100 bills with just his eyeballs showing), clutching his eighth note necklace, and seized by a trembling fear that there might be a gang of 40-something women out there somewhere...and 25 yrs after the fact, too?...Please... Every 60 year old dude should have such terrors.

[Saint John]

Stephen

Dean, I hope you were being a smartass by referring to Perry this way. If there's one thing I've noticed over the years it's that the real fucking nuts, and I mean people that should be put in a fucking institution, lobotmized and locked in a cold, dark place till they die, call him "Stephen."

[steveo777]

Stephen

Dean, I hope you were being a smartass by referring to Perry this way. If there's one thing I've noticed over the years it's that the real fucking nuts, and I mean people that should be put in a fucking institution, lobotmized and locked in a cold, dark place till they die, call him "Stephen."

Oh look! Crazy people calling crazy people crazy people!

[Rockindeano]

Stephen

Dean, I hope you were being a smartass by referring to Perry this way. If there's one thing I've noticed over the years it's that the real fucking nuts, and I mean people that should be put in a fucking institution, lobotmized and locked in a cold, dark place till they die, call him "Stephen."

Dude, are you ever sharp tonight. I tried to put Stephen in the proper setting. I did a good job didn't I? Of course I said "Stephen" purposefully. I heard Schon call him that when he was piss drunk in Boston, and he was making fun of him and his "admirers," err, herds of cattle.

[steveo777]

So much for the loons having their own peaceful little forum..........

[*Laura]

Between Dan's post and Dean's walk down muddy memory lane, I think I am going to simply die laughing.

[bluejeangirl76]

(probably hiding under a pile of $100 bills with just his eyeballs showing),

[steveo777]

(probably hiding under a pile of $100 bills with just his eyeballs showing),

Those kind of look like Steve's eyes, but how can we be sure?

[SherriBerry]

I'm hoping that the author posted this on April Fool's Day because she knows how bad it is and meant it as a joke. I once read a fanfic story that detailed a romantic relationship between Steve and Neal (catching it halfway through so at first I didn't realize it was meant as fiction ), but at least it was well written. My biggest surprise is that Dan hasn't commented on "Stevie, Jr" or SP being the product of alien intervention!

[Michigan Girl]

I once read a fanfic story that detailed a romantic relationship between Steve and Neal

I read that, it made me a little queazy!!

[SherriBerry]

I once read a fanfic story that detailed a romantic relationship between Steve and Neal

I read that, it made me a little queazy!!

Me too until I realized it was fiction! Then I wondered what the point was of making something like that up, particularly about real people.

[Sarah]

I once read a fanfic story that detailed a romantic relationship between Steve and Neal

I read that, it made me a little queazy!!

Me too until I realized it was fiction! Then I wondered what the point was of making something like that up, particularly about real people.

There are "slash" writers in every fandom. I think that many fanfic writers like to imagine real-life tension from their subjects as sexual tension. For instance, you'll find a lot of Harry Potter slash that pairs up bad guys like Snape or Draco with good guys like Harry or Dumbledore. Neal and SP had a lot of tension in real life so writers get creative imagining why they had that tension.

[Ftloperry]

(probably hiding under a pile of $100 bills with just his eyeballs showing),

[SherriBerry]

I once read a fanfic story that detailed a romantic relationship between Steve and Neal

I read that, it made me a little queazy!!

Me too until I realized it was fiction! Then I wondered what the point was of making something like that up, particularly about real people.

There are "slash" writers in every fandom. I think that many fanfic writers like to imagine real-life tension from their subjects as sexual tension. For instance, you'll find a lot of Harry Potter slash that pairs up bad guys like Snape or Draco with good guys like Harry or Dumbledore. Neal and SP had a lot of tension in real life so writers get creative imagining why they had that tension.

I was aware of it from Star Trek - there is some fanfic regarding a relationship between Capt. Kirk and Spock, but I think it has more to do with wishful thinking from gay fans. With fictional characters it's immaterial, but when it involves real people, it's a bit much.

[Sarah]

I think it has more to do with wishful thinking from gay fans.

Not at all! You're right that it's wishful thinking, but a good amount of slash writers are actually straight females.

[Ehwmatt]

Fag relationships among band members? lol. It's a firm reminder that although even a place like this is pretty friendly and has a lot of down to earth people, I don't doubt that some the crazier lot of you here have shrines to SP with pictures everywhere with alternating lipstick smooches and dart holes all over them, sit there flicking your beans to his image while getting more and more enraged that he hasn't released an album, and cut yourself while planning your eventual assassination attempt on the poor guy.

Geez, and we wonder why the guy won't let us hear or see jackshit from him

[perryfaithful]

"I am writing this to express my deepest regrets and to retract my story Steve Perry: A Generous Man."


I guess by the time I got around to reading this it was over.....

[ChildInTime]

Geez, and we wonder why the guy won't let us hear or see jackshit from him

I know!

Seriously, is he the only semi-famous guy with this amount of creepy fan-girls? Or are they just more vocal and out there than other creepy fangirls?

[SherriBerry]

Geez, and we wonder why the guy won't let us hear or see jackshit from him

I know!

Seriously, is he the only semi-famous guy with this amount of creepy fan-girls? Or are they just more vocal and out there than other creepy fangirls?

I think they are just more vocal. At least he hasn't had to move to Switzerland like Tina Turner, Shania Twain, and Frida Lyngstad from ABBA.