Shove the Apology!

[Rockindeano]

Jesus Christ. So much for offering a branch of good will, huh?

I was serious, and still am too, about being kinder to BT and its' members. I offered the best intentions and good will gesture, but these holier than thou fuckholes respond by saying they will monitor my behaviour and see "where we are in 30 days." They also set a stringent load of "conditions." You believe these assholes? This isn't Mid East Peace Talks. This isn't Congressional budget talks. We are talking Message Boards.

Apologize BY NAME to each and every moderator?

See where we are in 30 days?

Well, here is my response.

FUCK YOU!


Andrew, wait til you see the shit they wrote me. I am DONE playing Mr. Uniter. Lord knows I tried and will still try to refrain from insulting, however, I cannot promise to always do that.

So, Rusty, you sir have failed miserably in your role in Message Board Peace talks. You dropped the ball and so did Cj. Any lip from you assholes and I will post those regoddamnediculous PM's with the fucking "conditions" you mandated.

You can also forget about ANY apologies coming from me. You took a good willed gesture and tried to one up me. You should know by now that would never be possible. History, my friend. Learn from it.

[larryfromnextdoor]

you tried, AND THAT was nobel..... i dont understand why there would be conditions on anything, what does that mean? i understood you just wanting to make things more friendly... heck you were so friendly you threw some of us for a loop! what would be monitored? maybe they think you want to post there again.. geesh thats crazy,, good on you man!

[ArnelRox]

So, Rusty, you sir have failed miserably in your role in Message Board Peace talks.

Hey, I guess he tried too. Should we send him to the middle east to work things out there too?

[Andrew]

I'm very VERY disappointed.

Deano, your response is a little more colourful than I'd like to see, but I am aware of the conditions imposed on you and I think this sets relations between forums way back.

I really don't want to see any division among internet fans, but this response to your apology clearly redefines the Them And Us situation that exists.

Sadly I think some will see your words Deano and merely state 'I knew it...told you so...'

I knew your apology was genuine, it is a shame it could not have been taken on face value and as a point where we could all move forward from.

[Rockindeano]

Andrew, the naysayers cannot claim the "I told you so" card. I posted an eloquent post and received BS conditions, after the fact.

I honestly DID try, and will still refrain from needless BT abuse, however, if the situation warrants, I will unleash a fury on them.

[Deb]

I honestly DID try, and will still refrain from needless BT abuse, however, if the situation warrants, I will unleash a fury on them.

And that is all anybody can ask of ya. Good on ya Deano.

[Aaron]

Hey man, you gave it a good shot and they hosed you. I'm with you, fuck'em. Good to see you're back.

[larryfromnextdoor]

ROCKS ON THE HIGH ROAD

[Moon Beam]

Andrew, the naysayers cannot claim the "I told you so" card. I posted an eloquent post and received BS conditions, after the fact.

I honestly DID try, and will still refrain from needless BT abuse, however, if the situation warrants, I will unleash a fury on them.

Dean'o far be it for me to say anything however.....

You stated an apology, your stating
you stand behind it.
Unless leather pants fly and hippos moan.
Stand your ground, bite a grey goose soaked
rag daily if need be.
Dean'o I never know when to kiss ya or slap ya.
On this call I would kiss ya then slap ya and say...
Let it go, you did done good, now it's gotta go on it's own.

[Lula]

You did try and that is appreciated by many. I know you were sincere in apologizing and did it from the heart.

Perhaps 'both sides' will refrain from judging and insulting and this can be left in the past. Apologies offered, apologies not accepted, or apologies never made.... it's done. We are all Journey fans; we just have different tastes or sense of humors or something.

I for one am grateful Andrew has given us this forum and appreciate the freedoms he allots us. The fact that he is a journalist and has given us many Journey scoops is good fortune for us all and should not be used against him or MR.com, if that makes any sense...... the turkey is setting in

[Vladan]

Deano,

When I apologize to somebody, I say my piece and mean it. Once that is done, you leave it there. If they choose to listen or not, it's upto them. Look mate, aslong as you say you're piece, and if they don't accept it, then it's not you're fault anymore, they will live in bitterness, and they can sit there and hold a grudge (it's not healthy), they can sit there and be childish. If you honestly mean what you say, then that is all that matters!.

[Moon Beam]

Happy Gobble Feastivus to you Lula!

[Playitloudforme]

Deano, at least you had the balls to make an apology and attempt to mend the rift. Bottom line, you can't control how they interpret or take it. Just let it be man, keep your side of the sidewalk clean. Sorry they couldn't step up and meet you halfway.

[conversationpc]

When an apology is made, the onus is on the other party to accept it or not. My faith teaches me to accept a sincere apology (Luke 17:3 & 4), which I think yours is. Don't sweat the details. It's not in your power and can't be held over your head.

[Monker]

Andrew, the naysayers cannot claim the "I told you so" card. I posted an eloquent post and received BS conditions, after the fact.

Oh, contrair...

I basicaly quoted what would happen.

So, yeah, I can claim a BIG "I TOLD YOU SO".

however, if the situation warrants, I will unleash a fury on them.

How moronic and petty. YOUR situation is what drives your words, not theirs.

[Monker]

When an apology is made, the onus is on the other party to accept it or not. My faith teaches me to accept a sincere apology (Luke 17:3 & 4), which I think yours is. Don't sweat the details. It's not in your power and can't be held over your head.

That same faith would also teach you that asking forgiveness is empty if there is not repentness in his heart. Only he knows if that is/was there. It would also teach you that it is easy to fogive, but not so easy to FORGET. There are a LOT of things that Dean supposedly applogized for...and those things are going to be VERY hard to let go of and put in the past.

I don't care what conditions were put on him...If I were moderating over there, I would probably be even MORE restrictive...Maybe to the point of every post he made requiring approval. EVERYBODY should have expected that type of reaction from BT. If Dean was truly 'sorry' for 'whatever', he would suck it up and move on, instead of whining about the reaction.

[MartyMoffatt]

I too am very disappointed. I was prepared to take you at your word, but did you not expect that, given your recent track record for insults and obscenities, some people would remain cautious about your sincerity? If you really thought that one single post by you could wipe away seven months of vitriol in the two minutes it took to read that post then you are a lot more naïve than I though you were.

Of course people want to see continuing evidence of a change in behaviour – yet you lasted less than three days. Regardless of any ‘conditions’ – I don’t know what they are but I guess they included a period of truce – you should have been a bigger man than that. It seems to me that at the very first sign that somebody hadn’t blindly accepted and swallowed every word you said you start throwing your toys out of the pram again.

As I said, I WAS prepared to accept your comments in the manner in which you say they were offered, but cynics among us might think that you knew this would happen all along and engineered it deliberately so you could continue your abusive ways AND take the high road while doing it. And yet again, you have made this whole issue of relations between MR and BT about YOU. It isn’t, it’s bigger than that. However, you seem to be a leader on this board and many people here follow your every word, so the onus is on you to help make it work irrespective of what anybody else thinks or says.

There is still time, and hopefully a will, to make peace between these boards, but it requires more than just three days’ cessation of hostilities.

Marty

[jrnysc]

Deano,

When I apologize to somebody, I say my piece and mean it. Once that is done, you leave it there. If they choose to listen or not, it's upto them. Look mate, aslong as you say you're piece, and if they don't accept it, then it's not you're fault anymore, they will live in bitterness, and they can sit there and hold a grudge (it's not healthy), they can sit there and be childish. If you honestly mean what you say, then that is all that matters!.

Amen. Could not agree more. Good for you Deano. You did your best, and are the bigger person as far as I'm concerned. Nothing else you can do. Good job my friend.

[Wheels Of Fyre]

Jesus Christ. So much for offering a branch of good will, huh?

"Offered" is the problem. An olive branch isn't offered. It's presented UNCONDITIONALLY WITH RESPECT.

I was serious, and still am too, about being kinder to BT and its' members.

That is NOT an olive branch. To say you want to be kinder smacks of conditions! It's also like placing a powder keg next to a fire and hoping for the best. You never know when even the smallest spark might set it off.

Anyone who thinks I am an "Augeri Hater" should research posts from 2004 through October 2005. I supported him 100% all the time; sometimes at Mr. Perry's expense. I make no bones about this topic.

You said this despite telling me in a recent thread that you are INDEED an Augeri Hater. And as I pointed out: how can you say you've "moved on" when you admit to carry hatred? It's inconsistencies like these that raise the caution flag. You can spin things all you want but it all comes back around to pop you on the behind.

Steve unfortunately was in fact not singing live, and he was indeed hindering the Band and its' future.

And so this is why you went after SA. It wasn't because you felt cheated? That you and your GIANT and FRAGILE ego were fooled and you had to have revenge? Nah.

Here's my BIG question: if SA was hindering the band and its future then WHY did they continue the so-called charade? Can you explain EXACTLY HOW the band and its future were being hindered? You know, music is a BUSINESS and it seems to me that they've been VERY successful despite all of the nay-sayers with the gloom and doom prophecies of them never surviving without SP. They've been touring and making money so how can you say they've been hindered?

Since you won't be able to come up with a lucid or logical answer I'll answer for you: they weren't. And your saying they were has no foundation in reality. It's nothing more than a thin smokescreen to veil the truth to your motives regarding Tapegate and through this "apology" which have been nothing but self-serving and a way to stroke your own ego.

[Wheels Of Fyre]

I too am very disappointed. I was prepared to take you at your word, but did you not expect that, given your recent track record for insults and obscenities, some people would remain cautious about your sincerity? If you really thought that one single post by you could wipe away seven months of vitriol in the two minutes it took to read that post then you are a lot more naïve than I though you were.

Of course people want to see continuing evidence of a change in behaviour – yet you lasted less than three days. Regardless of any ‘conditions’ – I don’t know what they are but I guess they included a period of truce – you should have been a bigger man than that. It seems to me that at the very first sign that somebody hadn’t blindly accepted and swallowed every word you said you start throwing your toys out of the pram again.

As I said, I WAS prepared to accept your comments in the manner in which you say they were offered, but cynics among us might think that you knew this would happen all along and engineered it deliberately so you could continue your abusive ways AND take the high road while doing it. And yet again, you have made this whole issue of relations between MR and BT about YOU. It isn’t, it’s bigger than that. However, you seem to be a leader on this board and many people here follow your every word, so the onus is on you to help make it work irrespective of what anybody else thinks or says.

There is still time, and hopefully a will, to make peace between these boards, but it requires more than just three days’ cessation of hostilities.

Marty

Nice job, Marty! My sentiments exactly. I didn't see this until after I posted but it appears I'm not the only one who is "delusional" - at least not by Lula's Book of MelodicRock Psychology.

[ohsherrie]

And yet again, you have made this whole issue of relations between MR and BT about YOU. It isn’t, it’s bigger than that.

I think Dean was trying to set the tone for this board to show more understanding and tolerance towards BT. He did so because he's the one that gets the majority of the blame for the animosity whether it's all about him or not. Some must have thought he was opening the door for negotiations. It was an apology from him, not a diplomatic opening gambit. If there are more issues besides Dean's intolerance he can't really do anything about those.

There is still time, and hopefully a will, to make peace between these boards, but it requires more than just three days’ cessation of hostilities.

Marty

Whether that can happen depends on people from both boards, not just Dean. BT doesn't have to like the way we do things here, and we don't have to like the way they do things there. If the best we can do for now is ignore each other at least that's a form of peaceful coexistence. Maybe, after the announcement is made and things calm down, that peaceful coexistence can lead to friendlier relations. But only if personal animosities between individuals can either be put aside or at least not seen as representative of the their respective board communities.

[Crazie Scarab]

"No. I would ignore them and go on. You did your best"

Whether or not everybody accepts your apology or isn't so important. What's most important is whether or not your apology was truly from the heart. The best thing to do is move on forward the best way you see fit and not worry about it, Dean.

[CatEyes]

...+..
Perhaps 'both sides' will refrain from judging and insulting and this can be left in the past. Apologies offered, apologies not accepted, or apologies never made.... it's done. We are all Journey fans; we just have different tastes or sense of humors or something.

The best thing I have read .

Thanks, Lu.

Cat

[MartyMoffatt]

And yet again, you have made this whole issue of relations between MR and BT about YOU. It isn’t, it’s bigger than that.

I think Dean was trying to set the tone for this board to show more understanding and tolerance towards BT. He did so because he's the one that gets the majority of the blame for the animosity whether it's all about him or not. Some must have thought he was opening the door for negotiations. It was an apology from him, not a diplomatic opening gambit. If there are more issues besides Dean's intolerance he can't really do anything about those.

There is still time, and hopefully a will, to make peace between these boards, but it requires more than just three days’ cessation of hostilities.

Marty

Whether that can happen depends on people from both boards, not just Dean. BT doesn't have to like the way we do things here, and we don't have to like the way they do things there. If the best we can do for now is ignore each other at least that's a form of peaceful coexistence. Maybe, after the announcement is made and things calm down, that peaceful coexistence can lead to friendlier relations. But only if personal animosities between individuals can either be put aside or at least not seen as representative of the their respective board communities.

The reason I said Dean makes these issues about himself is because he, in the space of one post, made a 180 degree turnabout in attitude and, by the tone of his post, expected everybody to follow suit. Then, when it didn't happen immediately, he did another 180 degree turn and again expects all his cohorts to toe the line.

I understand Dean is a cool guy in person. I've read numerous posts and threads expressing how nice he is, and that's great. I have nothing against Dean personally. However, maybe I'm just being naive. I am pretty much the same person on these boards as in person, and I find it difficult to comprehend how someone can be so nice in person but so aggressive and melodramatic on here.

Your final paragraph above I agree with completely.

At the end of the day, the whole issue shouldn't be about apologies, on either side. Nor should it be about whether they were accepted or conditions applied. Forget all that. This should be about whether there is a genuine will to get on, without getting sucked into a blame culture. People here and there don't have to be the best of friends
but don't have to actively antagonize each other.

Marty

[80s man]

Jesus Christ. So much for offering a branch of good will, huh?

I was serious, and still am too, about being kinder to BT and its' members. I offered the best intentions and good will gesture, but these holier than thou fuckholes respond by saying they will monitor my behaviour and see "where we are in 30 days." They also set a stringent load of "conditions." You believe these assholes? This isn't Mid East Peace Talks. This isn't Congressional budget talks. We are talking Message Boards.

Apologize BY NAME to each and every moderator?

See where we are in 30 days?

Well, here is my response.

FUCK YOU!


Andrew, wait til you see the shit they wrote me. I am DONE playing Mr. Uniter. Lord knows I tried and will still try to refrain from insulting, however, I cannot promise to always do that.

So, Rusty, you sir have failed miserably in your role in Message Board Peace talks. You dropped the ball and so did Cj. Any lip from you assholes and I will post those regoddamnediculous PM's with the fucking "conditions" you mandated.

You can also forget about ANY apologies coming from me. You took a good willed gesture and tried to one up me. You should know by now that would never be possible. History, my friend. Learn from it.

You shoulda known what to expect from them. I always said BT folk are fine - the mods think they are gods tho.

[80s man]

I too am very disappointed. I was prepared to take you at your word, but did you not expect that, given your recent track record for insults and obscenities, some people would remain cautious about your sincerity? If you really thought that one single post by you could wipe away seven months of vitriol in the two minutes it took to read that post then you are a lot more naïve than I though you were.

Of course people want to see continuing evidence of a change in behaviour – yet you lasted less than three days. Regardless of any ‘conditions’ – I don’t know what they are but I guess they included a period of truce – you should have been a bigger man than that. It seems to me that at the very first sign that somebody hadn’t blindly accepted and swallowed every word you said you start throwing your toys out of the pram again.

As I said, I WAS prepared to accept your comments in the manner in which you say they were offered, but cynics among us might think that you knew this would happen all along and engineered it deliberately so you could continue your abusive ways AND take the high road while doing it. And yet again, you have made this whole issue of relations between MR and BT about YOU. It isn’t, it’s bigger than that. However, you seem to be a leader on this board and many people here follow your every word, so the onus is on you to help make it work irrespective of what anybody else thinks or says.

There is still time, and hopefully a will, to make peace between these boards, but it requires more than just three days’ cessation of hostilities.

Marty

It also needs for the mods to be a bit less up themselves.

[NealIsGod]

*yawn*

[MartyMoffatt]

It also needs for the mods to be a bit less up themselves.

Maybe. Stranger things have happened

Marty

[Mandi]

Well Dean,

You did try your best, and your intentions were very sincere and noble. I am disappointed and shocked at the response you received.

You tried to unite the fans, and you took the high road when so many others would not. For that you should be very proud. No one should ever be condemned for saying they are sorry. That is just plain rude.

The only thing you can do now is be yourself and forget about "them". Curtailing personal abuse and general ragging on BT would probably make Andrew's life a little easier, and for that alone everyone should try to watch it. Any more than that, you cannot do.

Regards
Mandi

[ArnelRox]

Here's my BIG question: if SA was hindering the band and its future then WHY did they continue the so-called charade? Can you explain EXACTLY HOW the band and its future were being hindered? You know, music is a BUSINESS and it seems to me that they've been VERY successful despite all of the nay-sayers with the gloom and doom prophecies of them never surviving without SP. They've been touring and making money so how can you say they've been hindered?

VERY successful? They haven't had an album that got into the charts or got airplay on the radio. They've done ok touring.

How were the band being hindered? Um have u seen them on TV? Have u heard them on radio? Any LIVE performances (other than concerts & they weren't completely live anyway) in the last 2 yrs? That's being hindered. Wait till u see what they do next. Maybe then u will eat ur words.

I can't believe u can be so stupid sometimes Fyre.