Hey Folks

by **PROPERRY** » Sat Oct 20, 2007 1:33 am

Dean and Lula,

That is very sad to hear about the loss of your son Trevor. :cry:

by **Deb** » Sat Oct 20, 2007 1:48 am

AR wrote:Donations to help Dean and Lula can now be accepted at the PayPal address: contribute@trevorfund.com

*note: You log into your paypal account and send the payment to that e-mail address provided above.

Please include your Melodicrock screen name in the text field. I'm going to provide Andrew with a full list of who donated and the amounts since we are doing this under the Melodicrock banner.

The website and a mailing address will be available ASAP.

Thanks.

Ed, thanks to you, Joe and Kim on your time and effort to set this up.

by **wildchildtwisted** » Sat Oct 20, 2007 2:04 am

Oh my God...there truly are no words. I am SO sorry Dean and Lula.

by **Liam** » Sat Oct 20, 2007 2:06 am

Now that I have a chance to get online and post this myself (thanks Rhiannon for posting the first one for me from the phone)...

Dean and Lula...I'm here for you both if you need me for anything. My condolences go out to you. Love ya both.

by **Tarseea** » Sat Oct 20, 2007 2:15 am

Dean and Lula my heart goes out to you at this time of great sadness there are no words that can be shared to ease your pain......I found this sweet poem for you to read HUGS to both of you....

O precious, tiny, sweet little one
You will always be to me.
So perfect, pure, and innocent
Just as you were meant to be.
We dreamed of you and of your life
And all that it would be.
We waited and longed for you to come.
And join our family.
We never had the chance to play,
To laugh, to rock, to wiggle.
We long to hold you, touch you now
And listen to you giggle.
I'll always be your mother,
He'll always be your dad.
You will always be our child,
The child that we had.
But now you're gone...but yet you're here
We'll sense you everywhere.
You are our sorrow and our joy,
There's love in every tear.
Just know our love goes deep and strong
We'll forget you never--
The child we had, but never had
And yet will have forever!
~Author Unknown

by **Matthew** » Sat Oct 20, 2007 2:25 am

I'm so sorry to hear this, Deano. All the very best to you and Lula.

by **ProgRocker53** » Sat Oct 20, 2007 2:27 am

God bless you and your family, Dean. Best of wishes, may you all find the strength to make it through this and beyond.

by **conversationpc** » Sat Oct 20, 2007 2:29 am

"A Greater Love" ~ Wayne Watson

When parents weep
There is a greater love
When children lose their way
A greater love
When wives cry out
And men have lost their dreams
There is a greater love
There is a greater love
There is a greater love

When tears pour out
There is a greater love
When healing does not come
A greater love
When sorrows flow
And joy is swept away
There is a greater love
There is a greater love
There is a greater love

by **Jeremey** » Sat Oct 20, 2007 3:03 am

Dean & Lula,

Sabrina & I were shocked and horrified to read your post yesterday. Our prayers were sent up for your family and your little one last night, and you have our deepest sympathy. Take care of yourselves and little Wyatt, and know that you have friends around the world supporting you during this time of loss.

Jeremey & Sabrina

by **Saint John** » Sat Oct 20, 2007 3:23 am

Dean and Lula, my deepest condolences to both of you. You two will be in my thoughts and prayers. Dan

by **San Diego Gary** » Sat Oct 20, 2007 3:32 am

Dean, you don't know me, and I only know you from here. There are a lot of things I disagree with you about. Still, when I read this, it was like someone punched me in the stomach, and knocked the wind out of me. I wish I could say something profound. All I can say, is I am SO, SO, sorry for you and Lula. I hope God can somehow bless you two from here on out. I will say a prayer to Him for you..........

by **Rockindeano** » Sat Oct 20, 2007 3:41 am

Jeremey wrote:Dean & Lula,

Sabrina & I were shocked and horrified to read your post yesterday. Our prayers were sent up for your family and your little one last night, and you have our deepest sympathy. Take care of yourselves and little Wyatt, and know that you have friends around the world supporting you during this time of loss.

Jeremey & Sabrina

Jeremey and Sabrina,

Listen to me.

Love your child like there is no tomorrow. Live each and everyday like it is the last. I have never felt pain like this in my lifetime and honestly do not know if I can handle it. I am in a deep dark place and for the firrst time in my life, I have no idea of what to do. I am clueless. That is one of the reasons I posted here; I need direction, I need to know there is life worthy of living, worthy of waking up daily and going about the day.

Trevor was the sweetest little guy. He was so loving, so good in all ways. He was my little boy, and he inspired me to get my shit together, and to be a better person and a good dad.

He lived half his life in NICU and the other in a too small apartment.

He never got to shoot pucks at me, play catch with Wyatt, or even have a birthday. I look around and see his clothes and I am a mess. I see his face looking at me in his last moments. I cannot escape the happenings that we went through. Running down the corridor to go outside to meet the medical personnel, only to have no one there. Screaming for anyone who could hear, to call 911. I laid him down on the sidewalk and started CPR. I have never felt so small in my life. I breathed air into my son's body, hoping that would bring life again. It felt as if I was in another world, that this couldn't be happening. Finally, medical personnel arrived and we went to the hospital. I knew he was gone as we left in the ambulance. It was a day that I will never forget and one I can't seem to get out of my memory. I fear for myself now. I need help in the worst way.

Jeremey, I singled you out because you just posted, and also because you have a newborn. You love that kid Jeremey. I have no doubt you are super parents, but something you might not know is how blessed you are to have a healthy child.

by **livin2do** » Sat Oct 20, 2007 3:42 am

There are no words. My thoughts and prayers are with your family at this time of need.

Matt

by **Jeremey** » Sat Oct 20, 2007 3:52 am

Rockindeano wrote:Jeremey, I singled you out because you just posted, and also because you have a newborn. You love that kid Jeremey. I have no doubt you are super parents, but something you might not know is how blessed you are to have a healthy child.

Absolutley, and last night after reading about your loss I couldn't hold him close enough...Every day I thank God for the blessing we have and for the decisions we've made to bring him into our life, and how easily things can turn on a dime, especially at that age.

Dean and Lula, don't be afraid to ask for help. Don't be afraid to reach out to friends and loved ones, and even professionals, because you are right, you cannot make it through something like this on your own. I can't fathom your heartache. I pray that you'll reach out to the right people for support. You can't make sense of something like this. When I read things like the above, where you don't know if you can carry on, we all want you to know it is important that you are there for your family, for your children and Lula as well. Please don't be afraid to reach out. And we give thanks every day for what we have. Hold your little one close, and know that he needs you too.

by **Memorex** » Sat Oct 20, 2007 3:56 am

Dean - the truly shitty long-term answer is time. The immediate better answer is Lula and Wyatt.

My wife and I focused all our love into the kids that came after we lost our first son. No other way to get through Dean. Wyatt will need you both more than ever. And I know you both will rise to that challenge. Hang in there.

Mike

by **Sassie** » Sat Oct 20, 2007 3:56 am

Deano I am just so saddened by what I just read from you. Please hold onto us. I have no magic words to give you guidance. All I can do is let you and Lula know how much we are thinking of you right now. I wish I could do more.

by **DSHinMICH** » Sat Oct 20, 2007 3:57 am

My heart breaks for you and Lula! I am so sorry for your loss! You all are in my thoughts and prayers!
Deb

by **Escape Artist** » Sat Oct 20, 2007 3:59 am

Dean,

I have three daughters and cannot imagine how hard this must be for you.

My deepest condolences to you and yours. :cry:

You are in my prayers.

Tony

by **Rhiannon** » Sat Oct 20, 2007 4:00 am

My heart is just shattered for you all right now. Once again, all of the love, sympathy, courage, and strength that I possess is going to you. :cry:

by AR » Sat Oct 20, 2007 4:03 am

I need to know there is life worthy of living, worthy of waking up daily and going about the day.

The reason is Wyatt.

Trevor was the sweetest little guy. He was so loving, so good in all ways. He was my little boy, and he inspired me to get my shit together, and to be a better person and a good dad.

You were already a good person just by being there for your babies.

Let me share something with you. When my wife got pregnant I wasn't so accepting. I made her life miserable because a baby wasn't something I wanted for myself. Even after my daughter was born, I really was only a dad in name. I was selfish and really didn't interect with her much for quite sometime. It took months and I didn't "get it" really until she started showing recognition and developing her own little personality. Now at a year and a half she's easy to love because the hard part is over. Some parent I was.

You on the other hand were there for Trevor since before he was born. You and Lula did everything possible for he and Wyatt from the second you knew of the complications. You didn't have to become a better person, because unlike me, you loved your child from day #1 and Trevor was in good hands from the moment he was born. As a father, you absolutely put me to shame. If anything, the way you handled things was inspiring. Trevor was fortunate that he was born into the right home for what was an all too short journey. He was a gift for 2 strong people and was given to you because someone up there knows you can get through this.

You've set an example I hope to follow for the rest of my life as a parent.

by **Granny** » Sat Oct 20, 2007 4:04 am

Dean...Lula needs you

Dean...Wyatt needs you desparately....your are his father too...
The pain will ease slightly in the weeks to come..Hang in there..call us or come in here to vent..
We love all of you...

by **Lady Luck** » Sat Oct 20, 2007 4:06 am

Rockindeano wrote:I need to know there is life worthy of living, worthy of waking up daily and going about the day.

You need to look no further than Lula and Wyatt. THEY are your reasons for waking up daily and going about the day.

by **piecesofeight** » Sat Oct 20, 2007 4:08 am

Rockindeano wrote:
Jeremey wrote:Dean & Lula,

Sabrina & I were shocked and horrified to read your post yesterday. Our prayers were sent up for your family and your little one last night, and you have our deepest sympathy. Take care of yourselves and little Wyatt, and know that you have friends around the world supporting you during this time of loss.

Jeremey & Sabrina

Jeremey and Sabrina,

Listen to me.

Love your child like there is no tomorrow. Live each and everyday like it is the last. I have never felt pain like this in my lifetime and honestly do not know if I can handle it. I am in a deep dark place and for the firrst time in my life, I have no idea of what to do. I am clueless. That is one of the reasons I posted here; I need direction, I need to know there is life worthy of living, worthy of waking up daily and going about the day.

Trevor was the sweetest little guy. He was so loving, so good in all ways. He was my little boy, and he inspired me to get my shit together, and to be a better person and a good dad.

He lived half his life in NICU and the other in a too small apartment.

He never got to shoot pucks at me, play catch with Wyatt, or even have a birthday. I look around and see his clothes and I am a mess. I see his face looking at me in his last moments. I cannot escape the happenings that we went through. Running down the corridor to go outside to meet the medical personnel, only to have no one there. Screaming for anyone who could hear, to call 911. I laid him down on the sidewalk and started CPR. I have never felt so small in my life. I breathed air into my son's body, hoping that would bring life again. It felt as if I was in another world, that this couldn't be happening. Finally, medical personnel arrived and we went to the hospital. I knew he was gone as we left in the ambulance. It was a day that I will never forget and one I can't seem to get out of my memory. I fear for myself now. I need help in the worst way.

Jeremey, I singled you out because you just posted, and also because you have a newborn. You love that kid Jeremey. I have no doubt you are super parents, but something you might not know is how blessed you are to have a healthy child.

I don't believe any post has ever brought me to such tears. I have thoughts going all over the place...
The first thing that comes to mind is that you too have something still. You have Wyatt. He needs you, and will need you more later..more than you can even imagine right now. If not for anything but him, you hang on.

This all proves that no matter what goes on around here, and I believe most of it is just out of control passion, what is going on in this thread right now proves what people around here are really like, and shows who you really are. It shows who we all are and proves what passion can really be when given a chance to come to light when it really matters.

What you do you ask, is you hold and love Wyatt. He is your strength in all this, more than you can ever imagine right now. You lost a gift from God, but He gave you two precious gifts...and the reasons for both, and the outcome will be shown too you.

You came here to get some peace and look, look what is happening amongst people who go at it all the time, yet none of it matters in the scheme of what is proving what really matters.

Those of us who are Christians, believe in a higher power and/or prayer know that things happen for a reason. We have to believe this to get through stuff like this. We also know that the best thing we can do for anyone is to pray for them.

I think we should pick a time and have a moment of silence if you will. If that's possible. And for those of us who believe in prayer, which seems to be many of us here, we have a moment of prayer together.

Maybe I have said to much, yet I don't feel like I have said enough....

I have always admired your honesty and openess about anything. You are what you are and that's very respectful.
For you to come here and open your heartache like you have just blows me away. I respect you very much for being able to do that.

The bottom line is that you have to carry on for Wyatt. Yes, for Lula and others too, that's a given, but if you focus on how much that helpless little being needs you, and then with all who pray for you, I honestly believe you are going to come out of this very strong.

by **Deb** » Sat Oct 20, 2007 4:09 am

Rockindeano wrote:Jeremey and Sabrina,

Listen to me.

Love your child like there is no tomorrow. Live each and everyday like it is the last. I have never felt pain like this in my lifetime and honestly do not know if I can handle it. I am in a deep dark place and for the firrst time in my life, I have no idea of what to do. I am clueless. That is one of the reasons I posted here; I need direction, I need to know there is life worthy of living, worthy of waking up daily and going about the day.

Trevor was the sweetest little guy. He was so loving, so good in all ways. He was my little boy, and he inspired me to get my shit together, and to be a better person and a good dad.

He lived half his life in NICU and the other in a too small apartment.

He never got to shoot pucks at me, play catch with Wyatt, or even have a birthday. I look around and see his clothes and I am a mess. I see his face looking at me in his last moments. I cannot escape the happenings that we went through. Running down the corridor to go outside to meet the medical personnel, only to have no one there. Screaming for anyone who could hear, to call 911. I laid him down on the sidewalk and started CPR. I have never felt so small in my life. I breathed air into my son's body, hoping that would bring life again. It felt as if I was in another world, that this couldn't be happening. Finally, medical personnel arrived and we went to the hospital. I knew he was gone as we left in the ambulance. It was a day that I will never forget and one I can't seem to get out of my memory. I fear for myself now. I need help in the worst way.

Jeremey, I singled you out because you just posted, and also because you have a newborn. You love that kid Jeremey. I have no doubt you are super parents, but something you might not know is how blessed you are to have a healthy child.

Dean, I can't imagine how unbearable the grief and shock are right now. I hugged my daughter extra tight last night. :cry:

But Dean when you feel that despair, please reach out to Lu or pick up that phone and call somebody, anybody. You both need to "feel" and you need to "talk". Please know you both have friends all over the world that love you and are rooting for you guys.

by **NealIsGod** » Sat Oct 20, 2007 4:12 am

Dean, you and Lula are loved by many, many people. You both have decades of memories to make with Wyatt ahead of you. Even though Trevor was your son, he only truly belongs to God, as all of us do. Trevor would want you to be there to take care of his brother and make his life as wonderful as you can. The three of you can get through this together. And Jeremey is right - take advantage of the support system you have in place as well as professionals. We are all pulling for you.

by AR » Sat Oct 20, 2007 4:26 am

In addition to the PayPal address of contribute@trevorfund.com

We now have a mailing address if you wish to send a check:

Trevor Fund
c/o Kim
PO Box 327
Lowell, MA 01853

Please make all checks payable to Dean Ohlrich.

We'll start a separate thread for this once the main page is up an running. Thanks to all who have contributed already.

by **RedWingFan** » Sat Oct 20, 2007 4:55 am

Rockindeano wrote:Love your child like there is no tomorrow. Live each and everyday like it is the last. I have never felt pain like this in my lifetime and honestly do not know if I can handle it. I am in a deep dark place and for the firrst time in my life, I have no idea of what to do. I am clueless. That is one of the reasons I posted here; I need direction, I need to know there is life worthy of living, worthy of waking up daily and going about the day.

Dean, God made us all a beautiful promise! Don't forget or reject that! My wife and I had a close call with our 9 month old boy when he was born. After being rushed into the O.R. for an emergency c-section we found that he was being strangled by his umbilical cord which was wrapped around his neck 3 times over. Please believe in God's promise!!!!

With Hope - Steven Curtis Chapman

This is not at all how
We thought it was supposed to be
We had so many plans for you
We had so many dreams
And now you've gone away
And left us with the memories of your smile
And nothing we can say
And nothing we can do
Can take away the pain
The pain of losing you

We can cry with hope
We can say goodbye with hope
'Cause we know our goodbye is not the end
We can grieve with hope
Because we believe with hope
There's a place where we'll see your face again
We'll see your face again

Never have I known
Anything so hard to understand
Never have I questioned more
The wisdom of God's plan
But through the cloud of tears
I see the Father smile and say well done
And I imagine you
Where you wanted most to be
Seeing all your dreams come true
'Cause now you're home and now you're free

We can cry with hope, we can say goodbye with hope
'Cause we know our goodbye is not the end
We can grieve with hope, because we believe with hope
There's a place where we'll see your face again
We'll see your face again

We have this hope as an anchor
'Cause we believe that everything God promised us is true

So we can cry with hope, we can say goodbye with hope
'Cause we know our goodbye is not the end
We can grieve with hope, because we believe with hope
There's a place
By God's grace
There's a place where we'll see your face again

by **Moon Beam** » Sat Oct 20, 2007 4:56 am

AR wrote:In addition to the PayPal address of contribute@trevorfund.com

We now have a mailing address if you wish to send a check:

Trevor Fund
c/o Kim Dyer
PO Box 327
Lowell, MA 01853

Please make all checks payable to Dean Ohlrich.

Thank you so very much AR and Kim for doing this.
Very thoughtful and helpful of you both.
I will send what I can when Hubby Bub gets paid next Friday.

Dean and Lula I wish our tears could help wash away
your sorrow........I have buckets of em for you both here.

by **perrylover52** » Sat Oct 20, 2007 4:59 am

AR wrote:In addition to the PayPal address of contribute@trevorfund.com

We now have a mailing address if you wish to send a check:

Trevor Fund
c/o Kim Dyer
PO Box 327
Lowell, MA 01853

Please make all checks payable to Dean Ohlrich.

We'll start a separate thread for this once the main page is up an running. Thanks to all who have contributed already.

Thanks AR. I don't have a credit card so this I can do. Thanks again

by **piecesofeight** » Sat Oct 20, 2007 5:36 am

I myself have been going through a lot lately, and while I am not a fan of much of the mellower Christian rock that's out there. When I have my cordless headphones on, I sometimes pick up a local Christian radio station when I'm out of range for what I am using the headphones for. I keep picking up this song and finally had to find out what it was.
Long story, short, everytime I hear it, it puts me back at peace. Not the same as hearing it, but..I just heard this again a few minutes ago, and the second to the last paragraph really hit me.

Casting Crowns-

Here I am Lord,
and I'm drowning
in your sea of forgetfulness
the chains of yesterday surround me
I yearn for peace and rest
I dont want to end up where you found me
and it echoes in my mind,
keeps me awake tonight

I know you cast my sin as far as the east is from the west
and I stand before you now,
as if I've never sinned
but today I feel like I'm just one mistake away
from you leaving me this way

and Jesus can you show me
just how far the east is from the west
cause I can't bear to see the man I've been
rising up in me again
in the arms of your mercy I find rest,
cause you know just how far the East is from the West
from one scarred hand to the other.

I start the day the war begins
endless reminding of my sin
time and time again your truth is drowned out
by the storm I'm in
today I feel like I'm just one mistake away,
from you leaving me this way and Jesus can you show me,
just how far the East is from the West
cause I can't bear to see the man I've been
rising up in me again
in the arms of your mercy I find rest
'cause you know
just how far the East is from the West
from one scarred hand to the other.

I know you've washed me white,
turned my darkness into light
I need your peace to get me through,
to get me through this night
can't live by what I feel
but by the Truth your Word reveals,
I'm not holding on to you
but you're holding on to me,
you're holding on to me

Jesus you know
just how far the East is from the West
I don't have to see the man I've been,
rising up in me again
in the arms of your mercy I find rest
'cause you know just how far the East is from the West,
just how far,
from one scarred hand to the other.

MR

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