OT: The Chicken Question

by **TRAGChick** » Wed Nov 12, 2008 9:27 am

Why did the chicken cross the road?

SARAH PALIN: Before it got to the other side, I shot the chicken, cleaned and dressed it, and had chicken burgers for lunch.

BARACK OBAMA: The chicken crossed the road because it was time for a change! The chicken wanted change!

JOHN MC CAIN: My friends, that chicken crossed the road because he recognized the need to engage in cooperation and dialogue with all the chickens on the other side of the road.

HILLARY CLINTON: When I was First Lady, I personally helped that little chicken to cross the road. This experience makes me uniquely qualified to ensure right from Day One that every chicken in this country gets the chance it deserves to cross the road. But then, this really isnʼt about me.

GEORGE W. BUSH: We donʼt really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road, or not. The chicken is either against us, or for us. There is no middle ground here.

DICK CHENEY: Whereʼs my gun?

COLIN POWELL: Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite image of the chicken crossing the road.

BILL CLINTON: I did not cross the road with that chicken. What is your definition of chicken?

AL GORE: I invented the chicken.

JOHN KERRY: Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I am now against it! It was the wrong road to cross, and I was misled about the chickenʼs intentions. I am not for it now and will remain against it.

AL SHARPTON: Why are all the chickens white? We need some black chickens.

DR. PHIL: The problem we have here is that this chicken doesnʼt realize that he must first deal with the problem on this side of the road before it goes after the problem on the other side of the road. What we need to do is help him realize how stupid heʼs acting by not taking on his current problems before adding new problems.

OPRAH: Well, I understand that the chicken is having problems, which is why he wants to cross this road so bad. So instead of having the chicken learn from his mistakes and take falls, which is a part of life, Iʼm going to give this chicken a car so that he can just drive across the road and not live his life like the rest of the chickens.

ANDERSON COOPER, CNN: We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet been allowed access to the other side of the road.

NANCY GRACE: That chicken crossed the road because heʼs guilty! You can see it in his eyes and the way he walks.

PAT BUCHANAN: To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American.

MARTHA STEWART: No one called me to warn me which way that chicken was going. I had a standing order at the Farmerʼs Market to sell my eggs when the price dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any insider information.

DR. SEUSS: Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed Iʼve not been told.

ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die in the rain, alone.

GRANDPA: In my day we didnʼt ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough.

BARBARA WALTERS: Isnʼt that interesting? In a few moments, we will be listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heart-warming story of how it experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to accomplish its lifelong dream of crossing the road.

ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.

JOHN LENNON: Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads together, in peace.

BILL GATES: I have just released eChicken 2008, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook. Internet Explorer is an integral part of eChicken 2008. This new platform is much more stable and will never crash or need to be rebooted.

ALBERT EINSTEIN: Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move beneath the chicken?

COLONEL SANDERS: Did I miss one?

by **StoneCold** » Wed Nov 12, 2008 9:37 am

Funny thread title. I'd change it to just "The Chicken Question" and we can add our own.

Why did the chicken cross the road?

RANDY JACKSON - Who cares about the road. Is that fried chicken? Lemme have some! :lol:

by **TRAGChick** » Wed Nov 12, 2008 9:42 am

StoneCold wrote:Funny thread title. I'd change it to just "The Chicken Question" and we can add our own.

Why did the chicken cross the road?

RANDY JACKSON - Who cares about the road. Is that fried chicken? Lemme have some!

Done.

THIS should be interesting.... :lol:

by **treetopovskaya** » Wed Nov 12, 2008 9:46 am

one of my co-workers has that posted outside her cube for all to read. too funny. ernest hemingway is my favorite.. }:C)

palin is new to the list. hahahaa! }:C))

by **Rhiannon** » Wed Nov 12, 2008 9:49 am

STEVE PERRY -- The chicken never really felt like part of the other side of the road, so it crossed.

by **TRAGChick** » Wed Nov 12, 2008 9:51 am

Rhiannon wrote:STEVE PERRY -- The chicken never really felt like part of the other side of the road, so it crossed.

HAHAHAHAAAA

MOST excellent!! :lol:

This is all in good fun....Mr. Perry if you're reading - please laugh.

by **Rhiannon** » Wed Nov 12, 2008 9:52 am

TRAGChick wrote:
Rhiannon wrote:STEVE PERRY -- The chicken never really felt like part of the other side of the road, so it crossed.

HAHAHAHAAAA

MOST excellent!!

This is all in good fun....Mr. Perry if you're reading - please laugh.

I had to get that one in here for ya, Nora! BTW, congrats on all TRAG's good goings!

by **TRAGChick** » Wed Nov 12, 2008 9:53 am

Rhiannon wrote:
TRAGChick wrote:
Rhiannon wrote:STEVE PERRY -- The chicken never really felt like part of the other side of the road, so it crossed.

HAHAHAHAAAA

MOST excellent!!

This is all in good fun....Mr. Perry if you're reading - please laugh.

I had to get that one in here for ya, Nora! BTW, congrats on all TRAG's good goings!

Thanx!! ROCK ON!!\~/8)

by **Rick** » Wed Nov 12, 2008 9:54 am

I know a really dirty one. :lol:

by **TRAGChick** » Wed Nov 12, 2008 10:07 am

Rick wrote:I know a really dirty one.

....and....? :wink:

DO tell!

by **Rick** » Wed Nov 12, 2008 10:56 am

TRAGChick wrote:
Rick wrote:I know a really dirty one.

....and....?

DO tell!

Why did the pervert cross the road?

by **TRAGChick** » Wed Nov 12, 2008 10:57 am

Rick wrote:
TRAGChick wrote:
Rick wrote:I know a really dirty one.

....and....?

DO tell!

Why did the pervert cross the road?

Oh good Lord....WHY?

by **Michigan Girl** » Wed Nov 12, 2008 10:57 am

Rick wrote:
TRAGChick wrote:
Rick wrote:I know a really dirty one.

....and....?

DO tell!

Why did the pervert cross the road?

ok.....why? :wink:

by **Rick** » Wed Nov 12, 2008 11:00 am

Michigan Girl wrote:
Rick wrote:
TRAGChick wrote:
Rick wrote:I know a really dirty one.

....and....?

DO tell!

Why did the pervert cross the road?

ok.....why?

Y'all asked for this.

His dick was stuck in the chicken. :lol:

by **Michigan Girl** » Wed Nov 12, 2008 11:01 am

Rick wrote:
Michigan Girl wrote:
Rick wrote:
TRAGChick wrote:
Rick wrote:I know a really dirty one.

....and....?

DO tell!

Why did the pervert cross the road?

ok.....why?

Y'all asked for this.

His dick was stuck in the chicken.

lol
A well endowed pervert..... :wink:

by **artist4perry** » Wed Nov 12, 2008 11:33 am

by **Arianddu** » Wed Nov 12, 2008 11:58 am

why did the koala cross the road?

It was stapled to the chicken

by **Arianddu** » Wed Nov 12, 2008 11:59 am

Herbie Herberts Because it needed to get out there and TOUR!!!!

Neal Schon The chicken's been on the road since it was 15, man, it knows nothing BUT the road, y'know...

Gregg Rolie The chicken decided it had been on the road long enough, it was time to get off on the other side, settle down and have a family.

by **StoneCold** » Wed Nov 12, 2008 12:02 pm

Arianddu wrote:why did the koala cross the road?

It was stapled to the chicken

Is this Aussie humor? I don't get it. splain plz

Why did the chicken cross the road?

ROSS VALORY - It wanted a mo bile phone.

by **StoneCold** » Wed Nov 12, 2008 12:04 pm

Arianddu wrote:Herbie Herberts Because it needed to get out there and TOUR!!!!

Neal Schon The chicken's been on the road since it was 15, man, it knows nothing BUT the road, y'know...

Gregg Rolie The chicken decided it had been on the road long enough, it was time to get off on the other side, settle down and have a family.

NEAL SCHON - 'Cause I was there. All the chickies come to MY side of the road.

by **Arianddu** » Wed Nov 12, 2008 12:08 pm

StoneCold wrote:
Arianddu wrote:why did the koala cross the road?

It was stapled to the chicken

Is this Aussie humor? I don't get it. splain plz

Yes, it's Aussie humour of a particularly purile, surreal sort. Along with "What's brown and sticky? A stick" and "What's green on the outside and yellow on the inside? A banana disguised as a cucumber." You aren't meant to laugh, you're meant to groan.

by **Arianddu** » Wed Nov 12, 2008 12:09 pm

StoneCold wrote:
Arianddu wrote:Herbie Herberts Because it needed to get out there and TOUR!!!!

Neal Schon The chicken's been on the road since it was 15, man, it knows nothing BUT the road, y'know...

Gregg Rolie The chicken decided it had been on the road long enough, it was time to get off on the other side, settle down and have a family.

NEAL SCHON - 'Cause I was there. All the chickies come to MY side of the road.

I bow to your superior Nealism!! :lol:

(damn, wish I'd thought of that)

by **StoneCold** » Wed Nov 12, 2008 12:14 pm

Arianddu wrote:
StoneCold wrote:
Arianddu wrote:why did the koala cross the road?

It was stapled to the chicken

Is this Aussie humor? I don't get it. splain plz

Yes, it's Aussie humour of a particularly purile, surreal sort. Along with "What's brown and sticky? A stick" and "What's green on the outside and yellow on the inside? A banana disguised as a cucumber." You aren't meant to laugh, you're meant to groan.

GROAN humor eh? Let me try.

There are a lot of GROAN-ups on MR.

by **Arianddu** » Wed Nov 12, 2008 12:16 pm

StoneCold wrote:
Arianddu wrote:
StoneCold wrote:
Arianddu wrote:why did the koala cross the road?

It was stapled to the chicken

Is this Aussie humor? I don't get it. splain plz

Yes, it's Aussie humour of a particularly purile, surreal sort. Along with "What's brown and sticky? A stick" and "What's green on the outside and yellow on the inside? A banana disguised as a cucumber." You aren't meant to laugh, you're meant to groan.

GROAN humor eh? Let me try.

There are a lot of GROAN-ups on MR.

don't make me unleash my collection of terrible jokes on you - you may never recover! :twisted:

what's white and hangs off clouds? The coming of the gods.
What's brown and green, has six legs, and will kill you if it jumps out of a tree onto you?
A pool table

by **artist4perry** » Wed Nov 12, 2008 12:18 pm

Arianddu wrote:
StoneCold wrote:
Arianddu wrote:why did the koala cross the road?

It was stapled to the chicken

Is this Aussie humor? I don't get it. splain plz

Yes, it's Aussie humour of a particularly purile, surreal sort. Along with "What's brown and sticky? A stick" and "What's green on the outside and yellow on the inside? A banana disguised as a cucumber." You aren't meant to laugh, you're meant to groan.

You made my husband laugh! :lol:

So if that banana fell in a vat of vinegar would he be in a pickle?

I never said I was funny.................. :wink:

by **StoneCold** » Wed Nov 12, 2008 12:20 pm

Arianddu wrote:
don't make me unleash my collection of terrible jokes on you - you may never recover!
what's white and hangs off clouds? The coming of the gods.

That reminds me of Led Zep (hammer of) But I can't think of anything. Here ya go:

Why did the chicken cross the road?

LED ZEPPELIN -

by **Arianddu** » Wed Nov 12, 2008 12:22 pm

artist4perry wrote:
Arianddu wrote:
StoneCold wrote:
Arianddu wrote:why did the koala cross the road?

It was stapled to the chicken

Is this Aussie humor? I don't get it. splain plz

Yes, it's Aussie humour of a particularly purile, surreal sort. Along with "What's brown and sticky? A stick" and "What's green on the outside and yellow on the inside? A banana disguised as a cucumber." You aren't meant to laugh, you're meant to groan.

You made my husband laugh! So if that banana fell in a vat of vinegar would he be in a pickle?

I never said I was funny..................

Argh!! Pickle! :lol:

Like the strawberry who fell into a pot and got into a jam, the orange who stopped (it ran out of juice) and the grape that never cried when it was stepped on, it just let out a little wine...

by **artist4perry** » Wed Nov 12, 2008 12:24 pm

Arianddu wrote:
artist4perry wrote:
Arianddu wrote:
StoneCold wrote:
Arianddu wrote:why did the koala cross the road?

It was stapled to the chicken

Is this Aussie humor? I don't get it. splain plz

Yes, it's Aussie humour of a particularly purile, surreal sort. Along with "What's brown and sticky? A stick" and "What's green on the outside and yellow on the inside? A banana disguised as a cucumber." You aren't meant to laugh, you're meant to groan.

You made my husband laugh! So if that banana fell in a vat of vinegar would he be in a pickle?

I never said I was funny..................

Argh!! Pickle! Like the strawberry who fell into a pot and got into a jam, the orange who stopped (it ran out of juice) and the grape that never cried when it was stepped on, it just let out a little wine...

So, you've met my Dad? :lol:

by **Arianddu** » Wed Nov 12, 2008 12:30 pm

StoneCold wrote:
Arianddu wrote:
don't make me unleash my collection of terrible jokes on you - you may never recover!
what's white and hangs off clouds? The coming of the gods.

That reminds me of Led Zep (hammer of) But I can't think of anything. Here ya go:

Why did the chicken cross the road?

LED ZEPPELIN -

er... it wanted to embrace the musical possibilities of the other side? Sorry, mind's a blank. Only other (feeble) thing I could think of was the Chicken was a Plant.

by **Behshad** » Wed Nov 12, 2008 12:30 pm

JSS
I didn't even know the chicken went across the road until Kevin Cronin told me...

Tito
The chicken crossed the road to let you live.

Andrew
If one more chicken goes across the road I will close this road.

Michael Jackson
The chicken's parents said it's ok for the chicken to cross the road

MR

OT: The Chicken Question

OT: The Chicken Question

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