OT: Parents.. Sex.. Children

[youkeepmewaiting]

Whilst looking on that F My Life website, I read this,

" I went to get a condom because my boyfriend and I were going to have sex for the first time. When I opened the drawer, I saw that every single condom had a Jesus pin stabbed through it, and a note on top of the box: "love mom." FML "

If this is true, that what a irresponsible parent!

So my question is, Parents on the board, when did you give the "talk"? and start to accept that you children have sex.. (if they do..which I'm sure they dont...)?

[bluejeangirl76]

So my question is, Parents on the board, when did you give the "talk"?

I'm still waiting for my talk.

Oh wait... when I was 18, a guy I dated sent me roses and my mom said something (in the most negative accusatory tone you can think of) like "what are you doing that some guy is sending you red roses?" Does that count?

Gee thanks, ma.

[Suzanne]

I don't really remember ever getting a talk. I saw the obligatory film at age 10 or 11 about the birds and the bees in school and then had health in ninth grade. I was always very close to my mom and could ask questions. Whatever the health class at school didn't answer, I asked her about. I had a good head on my shoulders and was mature and smart enough to realize I didn't want a baby when I was still a teen.

[bluejeangirl76]

I had a good head on my shoulders and was mature and smart enough to realize I didn't want a baby when I was still a teen.

Same here. And thankfully I'm smart in that regard, and also smart enough to have gone and researched on my own the things I still questioned, since none of it was ever offered to me.

It has always kind of annoyed me... I mean, my mom raised two daughters, never said one damn word about ANY of this stuff, left the two of us on our own with it, and yet we still managed not to fuck up. I plan to be a very very different kind of parent.

[AlteredDNA]

So my question is, Parents on the board, when did you give the "talk"?

I'm still waiting for my talk.

Oh wait... when I was 18, a guy I dated sent me roses and my mom said something (in the most negative accusatory tone you can think of) like "what are you doing that some guy is sending you red roses?" Does that count?

Gee thanks, ma.

Well...what were you doing?

Seriously though, most parents don't say anything until they are confronted with the reality of their kids possibly being "active". I plan on being a different type of parent as well.

[StevePerryHair]

I had a good head on my shoulders and was mature and smart enough to realize I didn't want a baby when I was still a teen.

Same here. And thankfully I'm smart in that regard, and also smart enough to have gone and researched on my own the things I still questioned, since none of it was ever offered to me.

It has always kind of annoyed me... I mean, my mom raised two daughters, never said one damn word about ANY of this stuff, left the two of us on our own with it, and yet we still managed not to fuck up. I plan to be a very very different kind of parent.

Yeah, my son and I got to have a talk when he was in 6th grade. Yes, me and my son while my husband stood there with his jaw on the floor as my son explained how in science class they had their sex ed. and he learned about every type of sex there is and he had questions and was all open about it. So I took the opportunity to add to it with my feelings and beliefs and then he all of the sudden looked at my husband and I and got a look of horror on his face when he realized his PARENTS have sex, and he was done with the conversation I was really surprised at all they learn in school, a public school obviously, but I think it's a good thing. And he and I talked about the things he learned, and it was so funny how he wasn't embarrassed until he pictured us It got our lines of communication going while he was still young and innocent enough to listen. My daughter is in the 7th grade and we have talked too. And we continue to. I actually had to force my husband to talk to our son alone too. Some people are just not comfortable but I think its' important for that communcation. Doesn't mean they won't make bad choices, but at least they feel comfortable talking about it if they need to.

[Suzanne]

I had a good head on my shoulders and was mature and smart enough to realize I didn't want a baby when I was still a teen.

Same here. And thankfully I'm smart in that regard, and also smart enough to have gone and researched on my own the things I still questioned, since none of it was ever offered to me.

It has always kind of annoyed me... I mean, my mom raised two daughters, never said one damn word about ANY of this stuff, left the two of us on our own with it, and yet we still managed not to fuck up. I plan to be a very very different kind of parent.

Yeah, my son and I got to have a talk when he was in 6th grade. Yes, me and my son while my husband stood there with his jaw on the floor as my son explained how in science class they had their sex ed. and he learned about every type of sex there is and he had questions and was all open about it. So I took the opportunity to add to it with my feelings and beliefs and then he all of the sudden looked at my husband and I and got a look of horror on his face when he realized his PARENTS have sex, and he was done with the conversation I was really surprised at all they learn in school, a public school obviously, but I think it's a good thing. And he and I talked about the things he learned, and it was so funny how he wasn't embarrassed until he pictured us It got our lines of communication going while he was still young and innocent enough to listen. My daughter is in the 7th grade and we have talked too. And we continue to. I actually had to force my husband to talk to our son alone too. Some people are just not comfortable but I think its' important for that communcation. Doesn't mean they won't make bad choices, but at least they feel comfortable talking about it if they need to.

Being able to go to my parents (or in this case my mom) was the key for me. For some reason, she was never "a mom" to me to the point that I thought "Oh God, my MOM is talking sex with me!" I asked, she told me. Now, my dad is another story. He accidentally walked in my room when I was about 14. I was changing my shirt when he knocked and entered before I could answer and he saw me in my bra. (It was the same as a bikini top in my opinion, nothing lacy or anything) He freaked.

[StevePerryHair]

I had a good head on my shoulders and was mature and smart enough to realize I didn't want a baby when I was still a teen.

Same here. And thankfully I'm smart in that regard, and also smart enough to have gone and researched on my own the things I still questioned, since none of it was ever offered to me.

It has always kind of annoyed me... I mean, my mom raised two daughters, never said one damn word about ANY of this stuff, left the two of us on our own with it, and yet we still managed not to fuck up. I plan to be a very very different kind of parent.

Yeah, my son and I got to have a talk when he was in 6th grade. Yes, me and my son while my husband stood there with his jaw on the floor as my son explained how in science class they had their sex ed. and he learned about every type of sex there is and he had questions and was all open about it. So I took the opportunity to add to it with my feelings and beliefs and then he all of the sudden looked at my husband and I and got a look of horror on his face when he realized his PARENTS have sex, and he was done with the conversation I was really surprised at all they learn in school, a public school obviously, but I think it's a good thing. And he and I talked about the things he learned, and it was so funny how he wasn't embarrassed until he pictured us It got our lines of communication going while he was still young and innocent enough to listen. My daughter is in the 7th grade and we have talked too. And we continue to. I actually had to force my husband to talk to our son alone too. Some people are just not comfortable but I think its' important for that communcation. Doesn't mean they won't make bad choices, but at least they feel comfortable talking about it if they need to.

Being able to go to my parents (or in this case my mom) was the key for me. For some reason, she was never "a mom" to me to the point that I thought "Oh God, my MOM is talking sex with me!" I asked, she told me. Now, my dad is another story. He accidentally walked in my room when I was about 14. I was changing my shirt when he knocked and entered before I could answer and he saw me in my bra. (It was the same as a bikini top in my opinion, nothing lacy or anything) He freaked.

Dad's are weird about their daughters!! It's hard for them!! My husband freaked when he found out I bought our 7th grader a black bra. He sees white bras as being the functional ones I told him that she wears some dark tops that require a black bra. The men and their daughters thing cracks me up!

[bluejeangirl76]

So my question is, Parents on the board, when did you give the "talk"?

I'm still waiting for my talk.

Oh wait... when I was 18, a guy I dated sent me roses and my mom said something (in the most negative accusatory tone you can think of) like "what are you doing that some guy is sending you red roses?" Does that count?

Gee thanks, ma.

Well...what were you doing?

Lol! Honestly I was doing nothing... the guy was being sweet and trying to squire me... and sent flowers. Big deal right? My mother, being the horribly negative person she has always been, took it to mean I was doing a lot more than going to the movies with the guy. I could not believe she said that to me. I didn't talk to her for several days, if I remember correctly. Not only was I never given any kind of guidance or information about it, but she had the nerve to stand there and accuse me of it.

If I'd had a better sense of debating a valid point back then, I would have said, "Since I have yet to hear from YOU a single word or a single bit of information that might help me, I'm really not interested in your bullshit comments, kthxbai."

[AlteredDNA]

So my question is, Parents on the board, when did you give the "talk"?

I'm still waiting for my talk.

Oh wait... when I was 18, a guy I dated sent me roses and my mom said something (in the most negative accusatory tone you can think of) like "what are you doing that some guy is sending you red roses?" Does that count?

Gee thanks, ma.

Well...what were you doing?

Lol! Honestly I was doing nothing... the guy was being sweet and trying to squire me... and sent flowers. Big deal right? My mother, being the horribly negative person she has always been, took it to mean I was doing a lot more than going to the movies with the guy. I could not believe she said that to me. I didn't talk to her for several days, if I remember correctly. Not only was I never given any kind of guidance or information about it, but she had the nerve to stand there and accuse me of it.

If I'd had a better sense of debating a valid point back then, I would have said, "Since I have yet to hear from YOU a single word or a single bit of information that might help me, I'm really not interested in your bullshit comments, kthxbai."

I once sent a dozen roses to a girl for the same reason (trying to woo her)...Hope I didn't cause a rift between her and her Mom...

[Arkansas]

“I believe in making the world safe for our children, but not our children's children, because I don't think children should be having sex.”

- Jack Handy

[Jana]

So my question is, Parents on the board, when did you give the "talk"?

I'm still waiting for my talk.

Oh wait... when I was 18, a guy I dated sent me roses and my mom said something (in the most negative accusatory tone you can think of) like "what are you doing that some guy is sending you red roses?" Does that count?

Gee thanks, ma.

That's classic.

[Jana]

I had a good head on my shoulders and was mature and smart enough to realize I didn't want a baby when I was still a teen.

Same here. And thankfully I'm smart in that regard, and also smart enough to have gone and researched on my own the things I still questioned, since none of it was ever offered to me.

It has always kind of annoyed me... I mean, my mom raised two daughters, never said one damn word about ANY of this stuff, left the two of us on our own with it, and yet we still managed not to fuck up. I plan to be a very very different kind of parent.

Yeah, my son and I got to have a talk when he was in 6th grade. Yes, me and my son while my husband stood there with his jaw on the floor as my son explained how in science class they had their sex ed. and he learned about every type of sex there is and he had questions and was all open about it. So I took the opportunity to add to it with my feelings and beliefs and then he all of the sudden looked at my husband and I and got a look of horror on his face when he realized his PARENTS have sex, and he was done with the conversation I was really surprised at all they learn in school, a public school obviously, but I think it's a good thing. And he and I talked about the things he learned, and it was so funny how he wasn't embarrassed until he pictured us It got our lines of communication going while he was still young and innocent enough to listen. My daughter is in the 7th grade and we have talked too. And we continue to. I actually had to force my husband to talk to our son alone too. Some people are just not comfortable but I think its' important for that communcation. Doesn't mean they won't make bad choices, but at least they feel comfortable talking about it if they need to.

Being able to go to my parents (or in this case my mom) was the key for me. For some reason, she was never "a mom" to me to the point that I thought "Oh God, my MOM is talking sex with me!" I asked, she told me. Now, my dad is another story. He accidentally walked in my room when I was about 14. I was changing my shirt when he knocked and entered before I could answer and he saw me in my bra. (It was the same as a bikini top in my opinion, nothing lacy or anything) He freaked.

My mom was ultra-conservative Southern Baptist and would never even say the word sex to me when I was young, much less explain it.

[Sarah]

Well I think I learned about sex itself in 5th or 6th grade sex ed (we'd had sex ed before but it was all about STDs and periods). I remember many people were shocked and disgusted, lol. WHAT GOES WHERE OMG

My mom never talked to me about it, which was fine because I didn't want to hear it from her. She once asked me if I'd ever had sex over an email, because I'd been sick a lot and she thought I was pregnant. My parents were terrified that I was a lesbian for ages because I never had a real boyfriend and obviously I wasn't going to tell them when I messed around with anyone. I listened to Loveline religiously for a few years in high school, which taught me some valid stuff, I think.

Anyway, the OP story IS irresponsible, wow. Abstinence-only approach just does not work, I'm not sure why some people are still deluded into thinking it does.

[KDOUBLEU]

My Dad was a farmer He tried to explain everything to me using cows as an example. I Laugh now everytime I think about it.

[AlteredDNA]

My Dad was a farmer He tried to explain everything to me using cows as an example. I Laugh now everytime I think about it.

Good thing your Dad wasn't a New York / New Jersey Governor...

[MrsPerry]

my mom and i have always been very open about sex stuff.....and i can say i learned alot of valid stuff from reading, and watching my sister have 5 children, 3 out of wedlock. I never fooled around cuz i never wanted to go and tell my mom, and my priest for that matter, what i had been up to.

[stevew2]

My Dad was a farmer He tried to explain everything to me using cows as an example. I Laugh now everytime I think about it.

Good thing your Dad wasn't a New York / New Jersey Governor...

Or a New Gearnsry Govenrer