I have to tell you about tonight...

[G.I.Jim]

My wife is good friends with one of her ex co-workers, so we go to her and her husband's house for dinner. He's in the back yard cooking burgers, and every time he moves a burger he uses the spatula AND his left hand. After he moves all the burgers and they're all greasy, he bends down and lets his poodle lick ALL the grease off of his fingers (for probably 30 seconds).

You know where I'm going with this... He then continues to handle ALL of the burgers with that same hand. Not only that, but every other time he moves them (which he did CONSTANTLY), he licks those same fingers. That is the most disgusting fucking thing I've ever seen, and I had a hard time blocking it out when I was eating that shit!

So what do you do? I really don't even know the guy. Do you say "dude that's fucking NASTY!!!", or just be the polite husband and keep your mouth shut like I did? My wife had no clue about it until we left. DAMN!!!

[Peartree12249]

Tell him you're a vegetarian and you don't eat meat & stick to the side dishes.

[JH'sTXfan]

I can't believe you ate it.

[G.I.Jim]

Tell him you're a vegetarian and you don't eat meat & stick to the side dishes.

No can do. They've eaten my food before, and I'm known for my beef brisket!

[G.I.Jim]

I can't believe you ate it.

I can't either.

[KDOUBLEU]

I wouldnt go back there Jim. If he does that kind of shit when youre watching him who knows what he does while no one is around. That right there is why I do not go to potlucks!!

[G.I.Jim]

I wouldnt go back there Jim. If he does that kind of shit when youre watching him who knows what he does while no one is around. That right there is why I do not go to potlucks!!

I told my wife as soon as we got in the suv, "We are NEVER eating another fucking thing from this house again!!!". She looked at me like After I told her, she was grossed out too.

[Michigan Girl]

I would've said something to him while he was cooking...you KNOW I would have!!!

[Ehwmatt]

I hate people who do that kinda shit. Dogs are fuckin gross and dirty animals, I don't care how much you love or hate them, that's just fact. I don't ever think it's cute when a dog comes up and tries to lick my face all over the place, so I certainly wouldn't appreciate having dog drool all over my 1/4 lber with cheese either. What a fuckin choch you had to deal with tonight. Tell your wife to find some new friends

[KDOUBLEU]

I wouldnt go back there Jim. If he does that kind of shit when youre watching him who knows what he does while no one is around. That right there is why I do not go to potlucks!!

I told my wife as soon as we got in the suv, "We are NEVER eating another fucking thing from this house again!!!". She looked at me like After I told her, she was grossed out too.

BARF!

[portland]

I would have said something as well.....it's the Nurse thing.

YUCK!!!!

[JasonD]

Since I'm a nice guy I couldn't bring myself to mention it b/c I wouldn't want to hurt the person's feelings. However, I also wouldn't have been able to bring myself to eat the stuff he cooked & so I would have pretended to be sick. I would have acted as if I'm coming down with a cold or something, that my stomach was uneasy or my tastebuds were shot. I would maybe even ask if they had a Ginger Ale.... then I would have asked my wife if we could cut out early. That's the easy part.

The tough part is this: What to do about the wife? Would I say nothing & allow her to eat the food? Could I sneak a little kiss on the cheek in order to whisper, "Don't eat the food.... I'll explain later"? Whaddaya do in that situation?

[G.I.Jim]

I hate people who do that kinda shit. Dogs are fuckin gross and dirty animals, I don't care how much you love or hate them, that's just fact. I don't ever think it's cute when a dog comes up and tries to lick my face all over the place, so I certainly wouldn't appreciate having dog drool all over my 1/4 lber with cheese either. What a fuckin choch you had to deal with tonight. Tell your wife to find some new friends :lol:

Her "friend" got handsy with me a couple of times at a party at our house last year! She looked around, then grabbed my ass in the kitchen and roars like a tiger at me. It wasn't a quick grab either! I just walked away.

Later, I was playing a song on the keys for her and another friend and she goes "get me outta here before I jump his bones". Then she starts rubbing my back. I was like "I better go get a drink" and hauled ass outta there!

[WalkInMyShoes]

I told my wife as soon as we got in the suv, "We are NEVER eating another fucking thing from this house again!!!". She looked at me like After I told her, she was grossed out too.

Now wait.....you've got a gas-guzzlin', air pollutin', WASPY SUV and you care about a little dog spit?

Just kidding - that is gross and I would eaten only chips or what came out of a sealed package at that house.

[KDOUBLEU]

I told my wife as soon as we got in the suv, "We are NEVER eating another fucking thing from this house again!!!". She looked at me like After I told her, she was grossed out too.

Now wait.....you've got a gas-guzzlin', air pollutin', WASPY SUV and you care about a little dog spit?

Just kidding - that is gross and I would eaten only chips or what came out of a sealed package at that house.

Now you are going to have to drink some brewskis to kill the germs!!

[JasonD]

I hate people who do that kinda shit. Dogs are fuckin gross and dirty animals, I don't care how much you love or hate them, that's just fact. I don't ever think it's cute when a dog comes up and tries to lick my face all over the place, so I certainly wouldn't appreciate having dog drool all over my 1/4 lber with cheese either. What a fuckin choch you had to deal with tonight. Tell your wife to find some new friends :lol:

Her "friend" got handsy with me a couple of times at a party at our house last year! She looked around, then grabbed my ass in the kitchen and roars like a tiger at me. It wasn't a quick grab either! I just walked away.

Later, I was playing a song on the keys for her and another friend and she goes "get me outta here before I jump his bones". Then she starts rubbing my back. I was like "I better go get a drink" and hauled ass outta there!

JIM!!! This is a much better story!!! ^^^^^^^ Details!!!!

[G.I.Jim]

I told my wife as soon as we got in the suv, "We are NEVER eating another fucking thing from this house again!!!". She looked at me like After I told her, she was grossed out too.

Now wait.....you've got a gas-guzzlin', air pollutin', WASPY SUV and you care about a little dog spit?

Just kidding - that is gross and I would eaten only chips or what came out of a sealed package at that house.

Now you are going to have to drink some brewskis to kill the germs!!

Going to get one now!

[Ehwmatt]

I hate people who do that kinda shit. Dogs are fuckin gross and dirty animals, I don't care how much you love or hate them, that's just fact. I don't ever think it's cute when a dog comes up and tries to lick my face all over the place, so I certainly wouldn't appreciate having dog drool all over my 1/4 lber with cheese either. What a fuckin choch you had to deal with tonight. Tell your wife to find some new friends :lol:

Her "friend" got handsy with me a couple of times at a party at our house last year! She looked around, then grabbed my ass in the kitchen and roars like a tiger at me. It wasn't a quick grab either! I just walked away.

Later, I was playing a song on the keys for her and another friend and she goes "get me outta here before I jump his bones". Then she starts rubbing my back. I was like "I better go get a drink" and hauled ass outta there!

Oh man, that sounds like trouble in the first degree. My guitar playing almost got me in trouble like that a couple times when I wasn't single too, they love that shit. What can you do?

Dog owners are kinda like smokers in that many of them are pretty inconsiderate about minding other people's sense of disgust when dealing with their animal or their pet.

[Michigan Girl]

A FRENCH?!? poodle (my new nickname for french fry)!! I can't believe you let your wife...the mother of your child...the woman
you wrote a beautiful song about eat that burger!!! I'm letting you have it right now!!
It's very simple..."name of guy would you like me to get you a wash cloth or disinfectant
or something (after you witness the dog licking his hand), cause I know I don't want dog spit
on my burger"!!! :wink:

[G.I.Jim]

I hate people who do that kinda shit. Dogs are fuckin gross and dirty animals, I don't care how much you love or hate them, that's just fact. I don't ever think it's cute when a dog comes up and tries to lick my face all over the place, so I certainly wouldn't appreciate having dog drool all over my 1/4 lber with cheese either. What a fuckin choch you had to deal with tonight. Tell your wife to find some new friends :lol:

Her "friend" got handsy with me a couple of times at a party at our house last year! She looked around, then grabbed my ass in the kitchen and roars like a tiger at me. It wasn't a quick grab either! I just walked away.

Later, I was playing a song on the keys for her and another friend and she goes "get me outta here before I jump his bones". Then she starts rubbing my back. I was like "I better go get a drink" and hauled ass outta there!

JIM!!! This is a much better story!!! ^^^^^^^ Details!!!!

She was sitting next to me tonight, and kept touching my knee. I think she wants to "work out at the JIM"!

[Ehwmatt]

I hate people who do that kinda shit. Dogs are fuckin gross and dirty animals, I don't care how much you love or hate them, that's just fact. I don't ever think it's cute when a dog comes up and tries to lick my face all over the place, so I certainly wouldn't appreciate having dog drool all over my 1/4 lber with cheese either. What a fuckin choch you had to deal with tonight. Tell your wife to find some new friends :lol:

Her "friend" got handsy with me a couple of times at a party at our house last year! She looked around, then grabbed my ass in the kitchen and roars like a tiger at me. It wasn't a quick grab either! I just walked away.

Later, I was playing a song on the keys for her and another friend and she goes "get me outta here before I jump his bones". Then she starts rubbing my back. I was like "I better go get a drink" and hauled ass outta there!

JIM!!! This is a much better story!!! ^^^^^^^ Details!!!!

She was sitting next to me tonight, and kept touching my knee. I think she wants to "work out at the JIM"!

Don't be gettin drunk around her then, damn. Homewrecker alert!

[G.I.Jim]

I hate people who do that kinda shit. Dogs are fuckin gross and dirty animals, I don't care how much you love or hate them, that's just fact. I don't ever think it's cute when a dog comes up and tries to lick my face all over the place, so I certainly wouldn't appreciate having dog drool all over my 1/4 lber with cheese either. What a fuckin choch you had to deal with tonight. Tell your wife to find some new friends :lol:

Her "friend" got handsy with me a couple of times at a party at our house last year! She looked around, then grabbed my ass in the kitchen and roars like a tiger at me. It wasn't a quick grab either! I just walked away.

Later, I was playing a song on the keys for her and another friend and she goes "get me outta here before I jump his bones". Then she starts rubbing my back. I was like "I better go get a drink" and hauled ass outta there!

JIM!!! This is a much better story!!! ^^^^^^^ Details!!!!

She was sitting next to me tonight, and kept touching my knee. I think she wants to "work out at the JIM"!

Don't be gettin drunk around her then, damn. Homewrecker alert!

Bow chica wow wow!

[KenTheDude]

I hate people who do that kinda shit. Dogs are fuckin gross and dirty animals, I don't care how much you love or hate them, that's just fact. I don't ever think it's cute when a dog comes up and tries to lick my face all over the place, so I certainly wouldn't appreciate having dog drool all over my 1/4 lber with cheese either. What a fuckin choch you had to deal with tonight. Tell your wife to find some new friends :lol:

Her "friend" got handsy with me a couple of times at a party at our house last year! She looked around, then grabbed my ass in the kitchen and roars like a tiger at me. It wasn't a quick grab either! I just walked away.

Later, I was playing a song on the keys for her and another friend and she goes "get me outta here before I jump his bones". Then she starts rubbing my back. I was like "I better go get a drink" and hauled ass outta there!

JIM!!! This is a much better story!!! ^^^^^^^ Details!!!!

She was sitting next to me tonight, and kept touching my knee. I think she wants to "work out at the JIM"!

You need to boink the dog shit out of her...so to speak...no pun intended...

[JasonD]

I hate people who do that kinda shit. Dogs are fuckin gross and dirty animals, I don't care how much you love or hate them, that's just fact. I don't ever think it's cute when a dog comes up and tries to lick my face all over the place, so I certainly wouldn't appreciate having dog drool all over my 1/4 lber with cheese either. What a fuckin choch you had to deal with tonight. Tell your wife to find some new friends :lol:

Her "friend" got handsy with me a couple of times at a party at our house last year! She looked around, then grabbed my ass in the kitchen and roars like a tiger at me. It wasn't a quick grab either! I just walked away.

Later, I was playing a song on the keys for her and another friend and she goes "get me outta here before I jump his bones". Then she starts rubbing my back. I was like "I better go get a drink" and hauled ass outta there!

JIM!!! This is a much better story!!! ^^^^^^^ Details!!!!

She was sitting next to me tonight, and kept touching my knee. I think she wants to "work out at the JIM"!

Ahhhhhh...... so she's a nautilus naughty, huh?

[G.I.Jim]

I hate people who do that kinda shit. Dogs are fuckin gross and dirty animals, I don't care how much you love or hate them, that's just fact. I don't ever think it's cute when a dog comes up and tries to lick my face all over the place, so I certainly wouldn't appreciate having dog drool all over my 1/4 lber with cheese either. What a fuckin choch you had to deal with tonight. Tell your wife to find some new friends :lol:

Her "friend" got handsy with me a couple of times at a party at our house last year! She looked around, then grabbed my ass in the kitchen and roars like a tiger at me. It wasn't a quick grab either! I just walked away.

Later, I was playing a song on the keys for her and another friend and she goes "get me outta here before I jump his bones". Then she starts rubbing my back. I was like "I better go get a drink" and hauled ass outta there!

JIM!!! This is a much better story!!! ^^^^^^^ Details!!!!

She was sitting next to me tonight, and kept touching my knee. I think she wants to "work out at the JIM"!

You need to boink the dog shit out of her...so to speak...no pun intended...

I was laughing loud as hell when i read this an nearly spit out my beer!

[KenTheDude]

I hate people who do that kinda shit. Dogs are fuckin gross and dirty animals, I don't care how much you love or hate them, that's just fact. I don't ever think it's cute when a dog comes up and tries to lick my face all over the place, so I certainly wouldn't appreciate having dog drool all over my 1/4 lber with cheese either. What a fuckin choch you had to deal with tonight. Tell your wife to find some new friends :lol:

Her "friend" got handsy with me a couple of times at a party at our house last year! She looked around, then grabbed my ass in the kitchen and roars like a tiger at me. It wasn't a quick grab either! I just walked away.

Later, I was playing a song on the keys for her and another friend and she goes "get me outta here before I jump his bones". Then she starts rubbing my back. I was like "I better go get a drink" and hauled ass outta there!

JIM!!! This is a much better story!!! ^^^^^^^ Details!!!!

She was sitting next to me tonight, and kept touching my knee. I think she wants to "work out at the JIM"!

You need to boink the dog shit out of her...so to speak...no pun intended...

I was laughing loud as hell when i read this an nearly spit out my beer!

Hopefully that beer has killed the dog spit germs.

[Triple S]

I hate people who do that kinda shit. Dogs are fuckin gross and dirty animals, I don't care how much you love or hate them, that's just fact. I don't ever think it's cute when a dog comes up and tries to lick my face all over the place, so I certainly wouldn't appreciate having dog drool all over my 1/4 lber with cheese either. What a fuckin choch you had to deal with tonight. Tell your wife to find some new friends

Are not - and the fact that he licked his own fingers grosses me out just as much! He probably took a pee and didn't wash his hands before he brought the burgers out too .

[JasonD]

I hate people who do that kinda shit. Dogs are fuckin gross and dirty animals, I don't care how much you love or hate them, that's just fact. I don't ever think it's cute when a dog comes up and tries to lick my face all over the place, so I certainly wouldn't appreciate having dog drool all over my 1/4 lber with cheese either. What a fuckin choch you had to deal with tonight. Tell your wife to find some new friends

Are not - and the fact that he licked his own fingers grosses me out just as much! He probably took a pee and didn't wash his hands before he brought the burgers out too .

He probably spanked the monkey too. See Jim--- see what you were eating!!!

[Michigan Girl]

He probably took a pee and didn't wash his hands before he brought the burgers out too .

I am LMAO!!
Except for Jim's wife...poor thing!!!

[ProgRocker53]

Reminds me of these trashy guys I'm acquaintances with. Friends of friends, if you will.

We went to a Super Bowl party at their place, where there were Jager Bombs aplenty and homemade pizza. I sat there and watched the kitchen as a half score of cats took turns walking across the pizza on the table. I didn't eat any, thank God. I was just about to say something, then I saw my buddy sitting there gorging himself on a piece. I laughed my ass off, then I looked up just in time to see a cat piss on the pizza... my laughter gave way to tears... it was a remarkable display of skanksmanship....