Ladies, be glad...

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Ladies, be glad...

Postby conversationpc » Thu Jan 27, 2011 5:48 am

...you don't have external genitalia. I just stood up and almost popped out a nut. I almost imagined it dropping out of my pants leg. Ouch! :oops: :lol:
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Re: Ladies, be glad...

Postby Behshad » Thu Jan 27, 2011 5:51 am

conversationpc wrote:...you don't have external genitalia. I just stood up and almost popped out a nut. I almost imagined it dropping out of my pants leg. Ouch! :oops: :lol:

:lol:


Change the title real quick!! "Ladies & parfait, be glad..."

(Do it or I will change my avatar! :twisted: :lol: )
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Postby StevePerryHair » Thu Jan 27, 2011 6:05 am

Yeah, but as you can see by B's av and sig we have other things that can pop out...although it usually isn't followed up with an ouch! :lol:
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Re: Ladies, be glad...

Postby conversationpc » Thu Jan 27, 2011 6:06 am

Behshad wrote:
conversationpc wrote:...you don't have external genitalia. I just stood up and almost popped out a nut. I almost imagined it dropping out of my pants leg. Ouch! :oops: :lol:

:lol:


Change the title real quick!! "Ladies & parfait, be glad..."

(Do it or I will change my avatar! :twisted: :lol: )


Go for it...I have both of those pics dancin' in my Photobucket account now. :twisted: :lol:
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Postby conversationpc » Thu Jan 27, 2011 6:07 am

StevePerryHair wrote:Yeah, but as you can see by B's av and sig we have other things that can pop out...although it usually isn't followed up with an ouch! :lol:


No, but it IS followed up by a boing-oing-oing-oing-oing or scccchhhhhwwwwiiiiiinnnnggggg!!! :lol: :lol:
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Postby YoungJRNY » Thu Jan 27, 2011 6:09 am

I once remember sitting on my nut once. I was down my girlfriends house in the summer and all dudes know that humidity is sticky. So, I went to sit down, sat on my left testicle and just sat there in a silent, excruciating pain and fear. Everyone went outside and I just sat there with a confused look on my face for a good 20 min before I mustered up enough strength to stand up. Very scary moment, as well as having to play it off. A little tap of the balls can really destroy a man's stature.
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Postby StevePerryHair » Thu Jan 27, 2011 6:09 am

conversationpc wrote:
StevePerryHair wrote:Yeah, but as you can see by B's av and sig we have other things that can pop out...although it usually isn't followed up with an ouch! :lol:


No, but it IS followed up by a boing-oing-oing-oing-oing or scccchhhhhwwwwiiiiiinnnnggggg!!! :lol: :lol:
:lol: well if it's followed by THAT, then ouch can be placed at the end! :lol:
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Postby conversationpc » Thu Jan 27, 2011 6:10 am

YoungJRNY wrote:I once remember sitting on my nut once. I was down my girlfriends house in the summer and all dudes know that humidity is sticky. So, I went to sit down, sat on my left testicle and just sat there in a silent, excruciating pain and fear. Everyone went outside and I just sat there with a confused look on my face for a good 20 min before I mustered up enough strength to stand up. Very scary moment, as well as having to play off. A little tap of the balls can really destroy a man's stature.


Dude, I got sick to my stomach this time and almost started seein' stars. :lol:
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Postby YoungJRNY » Thu Jan 27, 2011 6:14 am

conversationpc wrote:
YoungJRNY wrote:I once remember sitting on my nut once. I was down my girlfriends house in the summer and all dudes know that humidity is sticky. So, I went to sit down, sat on my left testicle and just sat there in a silent, excruciating pain and fear. Everyone went outside and I just sat there with a confused look on my face for a good 20 min before I mustered up enough strength to stand up. Very scary moment, as well as having to play off. A little tap of the balls can really destroy a man's stature.


Dude, I got sick to my stomach this time and almost started seein' stars. :lol:


Bad. Another time was in a football game. We ran a fake-punt and I was one of the intended receivers in a flat route. I made a sick cut and found myself wide open in the portion of my field. I see the ball, coming in like a missile but very, very low. I had to go down on both of my knees to scoop it up but I mis-judged the rotation of the ball. The point of the ball SPLIT between both of my balls and I literally saw black and think I passed out for a moment. I made the catch but felt like my asshole was the size of the grand-canon. One of the only times I took myself out of the game for a few series. TERRIBLE feeling, just terrible and petrifying.
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Postby StevePerryHair » Thu Jan 27, 2011 6:16 am

YoungJRNY wrote:
conversationpc wrote:
YoungJRNY wrote:I once remember sitting on my nut once. I was down my girlfriends house in the summer and all dudes know that humidity is sticky. So, I went to sit down, sat on my left testicle and just sat there in a silent, excruciating pain and fear. Everyone went outside and I just sat there with a confused look on my face for a good 20 min before I mustered up enough strength to stand up. Very scary moment, as well as having to play off. A little tap of the balls can really destroy a man's stature.


Dude, I got sick to my stomach this time and almost started seein' stars. :lol:


Bad. Another time was in a football game. We ran a fake-punt and I was one of the intended receivers in a flat route. I made a sick cut and found myself wide open in the portion of my field. I see the ball, coming in like a missile but very, very low. I had to go down on both of my knees to scoop it up but I mis-judged the rotation of the ball. The point of the ball SPLIT between both of my balls and I literally saw black and think I passed out for a moment. I made the catch but felt like my asshole was the size of the grand-canon. One of the only times I took myself out of the game for a few series. TERRIBLE feeling, just terrible and petrifying.
Isn't that what cups are supposed to prevent? :lol:
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Postby YoungJRNY » Thu Jan 27, 2011 6:17 am

StevePerryHair wrote:
YoungJRNY wrote:
conversationpc wrote:
YoungJRNY wrote:I once remember sitting on my nut once. I was down my girlfriends house in the summer and all dudes know that humidity is sticky. So, I went to sit down, sat on my left testicle and just sat there in a silent, excruciating pain and fear. Everyone went outside and I just sat there with a confused look on my face for a good 20 min before I mustered up enough strength to stand up. Very scary moment, as well as having to play off. A little tap of the balls can really destroy a man's stature.


Dude, I got sick to my stomach this time and almost started seein' stars. :lol:


Bad. Another time was in a football game. We ran a fake-punt and I was one of the intended receivers in a flat route. I made a sick cut and found myself wide open in the portion of my field. I see the ball, coming in like a missile but very, very low. I had to go down on both of my knees to scoop it up but I mis-judged the rotation of the ball. The point of the ball SPLIT between both of my balls and I literally saw black and think I passed out for a moment. I made the catch but felt like my asshole was the size of the grand-canon. One of the only times I took myself out of the game for a few series. TERRIBLE feeling, just terrible and petrifying.
Isn't that what cups are supposed to prevent? :lol:


Never wore one. Messed up my stride since I have long legs and it always was uncomfortable as SHIT. However, I do wish I had one on that one play, my future children relies on it! haha. :lol:
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Postby conversationpc » Thu Jan 27, 2011 6:18 am

StevePerryHair wrote:
YoungJRNY wrote:
conversationpc wrote:
YoungJRNY wrote:I once remember sitting on my nut once. I was down my girlfriends house in the summer and all dudes know that humidity is sticky. So, I went to sit down, sat on my left testicle and just sat there in a silent, excruciating pain and fear. Everyone went outside and I just sat there with a confused look on my face for a good 20 min before I mustered up enough strength to stand up. Very scary moment, as well as having to play off. A little tap of the balls can really destroy a man's stature.


Dude, I got sick to my stomach this time and almost started seein' stars. :lol:


Bad. Another time was in a football game. We ran a fake-punt and I was one of the intended receivers in a flat route. I made a sick cut and found myself wide open in the portion of my field. I see the ball, coming in like a missile but very, very low. I had to go down on both of my knees to scoop it up but I mis-judged the rotation of the ball. The point of the ball SPLIT between both of my balls and I literally saw black and think I passed out for a moment. I made the catch but felt like my asshole was the size of the grand-canon. One of the only times I took myself out of the game for a few series. TERRIBLE feeling, just terrible and petrifying.
Isn't that what cups are supposed to prevent? :lol:


That's exactly what I was thinking...You play football, you wear a cup. :lol:
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Postby Don » Thu Jan 27, 2011 6:20 am

You haven't been doing steroids, have you?
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Postby conversationpc » Thu Jan 27, 2011 6:22 am

Don wrote:You haven't been doing steroids, have you?


Who, me?
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Postby Don » Thu Jan 27, 2011 6:24 am

conversationpc wrote:
Don wrote:You haven't been doing steroids, have you?


Who, me?


I was thinking of Ken Caminiti and how he talked about his balls climbing up inside from the drug. Imagine having to wait for them to fall down again. Well, we know how Ken ended up unfortunately.
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Re: Ladies, be glad...

Postby Behshad » Thu Jan 27, 2011 6:25 am

conversationpc wrote:
Behshad wrote:
conversationpc wrote:...you don't have external genitalia. I just stood up and almost popped out a nut. I almost imagined it dropping out of my pants leg. Ouch! :oops: :lol:

:lol:


Change the title real quick!! "Ladies & parfait, be glad..."

(Do it or I will change my avatar! :twisted: :lol: )


Go for it...I have both of those pics dancin' in my Photobucket account now. :twisted: :lol:


I hate you! :x Hope next time you stand up, both your nuts pop out ! :lol:
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Postby StevePerryHair » Thu Jan 27, 2011 6:26 am

YoungJRNY wrote:
StevePerryHair wrote:
YoungJRNY wrote:
conversationpc wrote:
YoungJRNY wrote:I once remember sitting on my nut once. I was down my girlfriends house in the summer and all dudes know that humidity is sticky. So, I went to sit down, sat on my left testicle and just sat there in a silent, excruciating pain and fear. Everyone went outside and I just sat there with a confused look on my face for a good 20 min before I mustered up enough strength to stand up. Very scary moment, as well as having to play off. A little tap of the balls can really destroy a man's stature.
Dude, I got sick to my stomach this time and almost started seein' stars. :lol:
Bad. Another time was in a football game. We ran a fake-punt and I was one of the intended receivers in a flat route. I made a sick cut and found myself wide open in the portion of my field. I see the ball, coming in like a missile but very, very low. I had to go down on both of my knees to scoop it up but I mis-judged the rotation of the ball. The point of the ball SPLIT between both of my balls and I literally saw black and think I passed out for a moment. I made the catch but felt like my asshole was the size of the grand-canon. One of the only times I took myself out of the game for a few series. TERRIBLE feeling, just terrible and petrifying.
Isn't that what cups are supposed to prevent? :lol:
Never wore one. Messed up my stride since I have long legs and it always was uncomfortable as SHIT. However, I do wish I had one on that one play, my future children relies on it! haha. :lol:
:lol:
I'll never forget when my son used to play soccer, and I decided when he was with the 14 year olds, maybe he should wear a cup. He ARGUED with me, but put it on anyway. We got in the car after the game and he was all pissed off, reached in his pants, whipped that cup out, and threw it on the floor vowing never to wear it again. Apparently mom's don't know anything about cups or chafing :oops: :lol:
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Postby conversationpc » Thu Jan 27, 2011 6:29 am

Don wrote:
conversationpc wrote:
Don wrote:You haven't been doing steroids, have you?


Who, me?


I was thinking of Ken Caminiti and how he talked about his balls climbing up inside from the drug. Imagine having to wait for them to fall down again. Well, we know how Ken ended up unfortunately.


No, this has nothing to do with steroids. I just had my legs in an awkward position.

That being said, I do take a steroid nasal spray for severe sinus issues but a very low dose and take no other kind of steroids other than that. I don't have the problem with my balls "climbing up inside", though. That doesn't like much fun, either. :oops:
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Re: Ladies, be glad...

Postby Rhiannon » Thu Jan 27, 2011 6:37 am

conversationpc wrote:...you don't have external genitalia. I just stood up and almost popped out a nut. I almost imagined it dropping out of my pants leg. Ouch! :oops: :lol:


Dave, I think someone hacked your account. For a moment there I thought you started a thread about your balls.

...Oh wait. :shock: :lol:
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Postby Melissa » Thu Jan 27, 2011 6:53 am

StevePerryHair wrote:I'll never forget when my son used to play soccer, and I decided when he was with the 14 year olds, maybe he should wear a cup. He ARGUED with me, but put it on anyway. We got in the car after the game and he was all pissed off, reached in his pants, whipped that cup out, and threw it on the floor vowing never to wear it again. Apparently mom's don't know anything about cups or chafing :oops: :lol:


:lol:

My son makes me cut out that mesh lining in swim trunks, apparently that's a major chafer too :lol: I'll never forget him exclaiming at the beach at 6 years old, "These shorts hurt my coconuts!" :lol:
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Postby StevePerryHair » Thu Jan 27, 2011 6:54 am

Melissa wrote:
StevePerryHair wrote:I'll never forget when my son used to play soccer, and I decided when he was with the 14 year olds, maybe he should wear a cup. He ARGUED with me, but put it on anyway. We got in the car after the game and he was all pissed off, reached in his pants, whipped that cup out, and threw it on the floor vowing never to wear it again. Apparently mom's don't know anything about cups or chafing :oops: :lol:


:lol:

My son makes me cut out that mesh lining in swim trunks, apparently that's a major chafer too :lol: I'll never forget him exclaiming at the beach at 6 years old, "These shorts hurt my coconuts!" :lol:
We remedied THAT chafing by him wearing boxers under his swimsuit :lol:
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Re: Ladies, be glad...

Postby Saint John » Thu Jan 27, 2011 7:12 am

conversationpc wrote:...you don't have external genitalia. I just stood up and almost popped out a nut. I almost imagined it dropping out of my pants leg. Ouch! :oops: :lol:


Fuck, Dave, do you have vacuum sealed pants or something? This isn't 1982, man. Trade in those Larry Bird nut huggers and get yourself some Nautica Loose Fit jeans or some Banana Republic khaki's. You owe it to your balls, dude.

http://www.nextag.com/nautica-loose-fit ... tores-html

http://www.bananarepublic.com/products/mens-khakis.jsp
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Re: Ladies, be glad...

Postby conversationpc » Thu Jan 27, 2011 7:15 am

Saint John wrote:
conversationpc wrote:...you don't have external genitalia. I just stood up and almost popped out a nut. I almost imagined it dropping out of my pants leg. Ouch! :oops: :lol:


Fuck, Dave, do you have vacuum sealed pants or something? This isn't 1982, man. Trade in those Larry Bird nut huggers and get yourself some Nautica Loose Fit jeans or some Banana Republic khaki's. You owe it to your balls, dude.

http://www.nextag.com/nautica-loose-fit ... tores-html

http://www.bananarepublic.com/products/mens-khakis.jsp


It has nothing to do with the tightness of the jeans...They are the right size. I've only had this happen a few times but, man, talk about pain. The only more painful things I've ever had are teeth needing a root canal and the kidney stone I had a couple years ago.
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Re: Ladies, be glad...

Postby Saint John » Thu Jan 27, 2011 7:23 am

conversationpc wrote:
It has nothing to do with the tightness of the jeans



Well then how does that happen??? You either have too small of a ball sack or elephantitis of the nuts! Wait, I seem to have come across a video of Dave's incident, folks:

http://www.ebaumsworld.com/video/watch/1019792/
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Re: Ladies, be glad...

Postby conversationpc » Thu Jan 27, 2011 7:25 am

Saint John wrote:
conversationpc wrote:
It has nothing to do with the tightness of the jeans



Well then how does that happen??? You either have too small of a ball sack or elephantitis of the nuts! Wait, I seem to have come across a video of Dave's incident, folks:

http://www.ebaumsworld.com/video/watch/1019792/


I don't see how their being too small would be a problem. Then they would never be in the way but I guess it probably could have to do with them being too big but dang...That guy has some issues. :lol:
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Postby Rockindeano » Thu Jan 27, 2011 7:36 am

YoungJRNY wrote:
conversationpc wrote:
YoungJRNY wrote:I once remember sitting on my nut once. I was down my girlfriends house in the summer and all dudes know that humidity is sticky. So, I went to sit down, sat on my left testicle and just sat there in a silent, excruciating pain and fear. Everyone went outside and I just sat there with a confused look on my face for a good 20 min before I mustered up enough strength to stand up. Very scary moment, as well as having to play off. A little tap of the balls can really destroy a man's stature.


Dude, I got sick to my stomach this time and almost started seein' stars. :lol:


Bad. Another time was in a football game. We ran a fake-punt and I was one of the intended receivers in a flat route. I made a sick cut and found myself wide open in the portion of my field. I see the ball, coming in like a missile but very, very low. I had to go down on both of my knees to scoop it up but I mis-judged the rotation of the ball. The point of the ball SPLIT between both of my balls and I literally saw black and think I passed out for a moment. I made the catch but felt like my asshole was the size of the grand-canon. One of the only times I took myself out of the game for a few series. TERRIBLE feeling, just terrible and petrifying.


And you call Jay Cutler a pussy? How the fuck does a ball go through someone's hands? I can honestly say I have never dropped a fucking pass in my life. Yeah, I have good hands but my point is that catching a football is easy as all Hell.

I do feel your pain though, Tom. I was a catcher in baseball and never wore a cup. hated it. Made me walk like a penguin with a fresh load of shit in my diaper. so I ditched the protective cup. First game out, the pitcher throws a 55 footer that bounces 6 feet in front of the plat and comes up underneath my ballsack...you know, where it is as tender as a girls earlobes...very soft, plyable and fleshy. runner on first ran on me...I watched him...he ran to second and when it became apparent I was temporarily paralyzed, he ran or walked to third. I had NO intention of moving. it was embarrassing because I was all geared up in catchers shit, and lay there motionless like Michael Irvin on a cold wet Philadelphia turf, where everyone was cheering for a hoped for dead Michael irvin...(tough town Philly is). anyway, from that day forward, I have always worn a cup, albeit a soft cup, even for pickup basketball, and especially for hockey. In all my years playing sports, hockey is by far the roughest and most dangerous, I can say that Big Jim and the twins never took any rubber from a slapshot.

My condolences Dave. You need any vicodin, PM me, I received a fresh shipment yesterday. :D
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Postby Deb » Thu Jan 27, 2011 7:40 am

Rockindeano wrote:I do feel your pain though, Tom. I was a catcher in baseball and never wore a cup. hated it. Made me walk like a penguin with a fresh load of shit in my diaper. so I ditched the protective cup. First game out, the pitcher throws a 55 footer that bounces 6 feet in front of the plat and comes up underneath my ballsack...you know, where it is as tender as a girls earlobes...very soft, plyable and fleshy. runner on first ran on me...I watched him...he ran to second and when it became apparent I was temporarily paralyzed, he ran or walked to third. I had NO intention of moving. it was embarrassing because I was all geared up in catchers shit, and lay there motionless like Michael Irvin on a cold wet Philadelphia turf, where everyone was cheering for a hoped for dead Michael irvin...(tough town Philly is). anyway, from that day forward, I have always worn a cup, albeit a soft cup, even for pickup basketball, and especially for hockey. In all my tears playing sports, hockey is by far the roughest and most dangerous, I can say that Big Jim and the twins never took any rubber from a slapshot.

My condolences Dave. You need any vicodin, PM me, I received a fresh shipment yesterday. :D


Who's Tom? :lol: Do you mean Travis?
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Postby conversationpc » Thu Jan 27, 2011 7:53 am

Rockindeano wrote:My condolences Dave. You need any vicodin, PM me, I received a fresh shipment yesterday. :D


No condolences needed as I didn't take a loss. Just a temporary setback. :lol:
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Postby Rockindeano » Thu Jan 27, 2011 8:05 am

Deb wrote:
Rockindeano wrote:I do feel your pain though, Tom. I was a catcher in baseball and never wore a cup. hated it. Made me walk like a penguin with a fresh load of shit in my diaper. so I ditched the protective cup. First game out, the pitcher throws a 55 footer that bounces 6 feet in front of the plat and comes up underneath my ballsack...you know, where it is as tender as a girls earlobes...very soft, plyable and fleshy. runner on first ran on me...I watched him...he ran to second and when it became apparent I was temporarily paralyzed, he ran or walked to third. I had NO intention of moving. it was embarrassing because I was all geared up in catchers shit, and lay there motionless like Michael Irvin on a cold wet Philadelphia turf, where everyone was cheering for a hoped for dead Michael irvin...(tough town Philly is). anyway, from that day forward, I have always worn a cup, albeit a soft cup, even for pickup basketball, and especially for hockey. In all my tears playing sports, hockey is by far the roughest and most dangerous, I can say that Big Jim and the twins never took any rubber from a slapshot.

My condolences Dave. You need any vicodin, PM me, I received a fresh shipment yesterday. :D


Who's Tom? :lol: Do you mean Travis?


Ask Trav why we all call him Tom in the NFL thread. he looks like the new England QB, Tom Brady. He hates that too....really torques the shit out of him too!
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Postby Deb » Thu Jan 27, 2011 8:14 am

Rockindeano wrote:
Deb wrote:
Rockindeano wrote:I do feel your pain though, Tom. I was a catcher in baseball and never wore a cup. hated it. Made me walk like a penguin with a fresh load of shit in my diaper. so I ditched the protective cup. First game out, the pitcher throws a 55 footer that bounces 6 feet in front of the plat and comes up underneath my ballsack...you know, where it is as tender as a girls earlobes...very soft, plyable and fleshy. runner on first ran on me...I watched him...he ran to second and when it became apparent I was temporarily paralyzed, he ran or walked to third. I had NO intention of moving. it was embarrassing because I was all geared up in catchers shit, and lay there motionless like Michael Irvin on a cold wet Philadelphia turf, where everyone was cheering for a hoped for dead Michael irvin...(tough town Philly is). anyway, from that day forward, I have always worn a cup, albeit a soft cup, even for pickup basketball, and especially for hockey. In all my tears playing sports, hockey is by far the roughest and most dangerous, I can say that Big Jim and the twins never took any rubber from a slapshot.

My condolences Dave. You need any vicodin, PM me, I received a fresh shipment yesterday. :D


Who's Tom? :lol: Do you mean Travis?


Ask Trav why we all call him Tom in the NFL thread. he looks like the new England QB, Tom Brady. He hates that too....really torques the shit out of him too!


No wonder, me has no interest in those initials. NHL on the other hand! :o And did you see my Flamers beat those 3 hot teams lately! Atta boys, get on it! :mrgreen:
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