Sorry for the length of this.
It’s pretty unsettling to read all the comments on the internet and hear some on TV talk about this outcome. I’m a middle-aged white guy. I have it very easy in the world of race relations and things being what they are, I am very happy that I don’t have to face the prejudices that others do. And my next statements are not meant in any way to suggest I have ever felt what others feel. I’ll choose this side of the street until such a day that everyone is treated equal, which obviously will not be in my lifetime.
As a white male, what I do get to experience is an incredible amount of guilt for feelings I’ve either never had or have had very little. I am not a racist. I do not treat people unfair. In my humble opinion, I treat people exactly the way they should be treated. But I’ve been told for so long that I am racist simply because I am white, that I feel guilt over it. I feel shame. These feelings are compounded by the fact that I know, as we all do, that many, many white people treated others disgracefully for so long and that many still judge others simply by the color of their skin, their sexual orientation, etc.
I can look at this case and understand the “here we go again” mentality of black people throughout the country. Especially when the media has framed a narrative that is so provocative. What I can’t understand though is the many “thoughtful” people, journalists, and politicians that say things as Melissa Harris-Perry has, or as the Guardian newspaper published:
Let it be noted that on this day, Saturday 13 July 2013, it was still deemed legal in the US to chase and then shoot dead an unarmed young black man on his way home from the store because you didn't like the look of him.
For 24 hours I’ve heard over and over how it’s open season and it’s OK to kill black people if you are white and all these weird stories about what happened that night that have never been suggested by law enforcement or witnesses. HuffingtonPost is bending itself into a pretzel trying to be the most shocking in its headlines and what scares me there is that it’s white people writing this and the comments sections are full of white people agreeing. Is it really a white person’s experience that we are out tracking down and killing black people and getting away with it? Is the problem of violence in our society white people killing black people? How does this narrative exist from what should be responsible people? I’m not going to pretend to understand what black people should be feeling or saying right now, but I do know that if anyone is being honest, there is no epidemic of Zimmerman/Martin situations out there – not even a little bit. It simply does not exist in any statistically meaningful way. Whatever statistics exist of white people killing black people is, I can pretty much guarantee you it is based more on other crime/gang activity and not simply because of race. Not that it never happens, but it’s not anywhere in the same universe as what everyone is saying today.
Yes – I think many white people are racist and they unfairly judge other races. And Harris-Perry actually had a very good discussion today on people’s subconscious prejudices – which is a far more valuable narrative. I live in an all-white neighborhood because I live in a largely white state. I did not choose Minnesota because it’s white. I chose it because I had a job here and because it is 2,000 miles away from my in-laws, who I am rather prejudice against. Not because they are Hispanic, but because they are assholes. But I digress.
My wife and I made friends with only one family in the neighborhood. They were a lovely black family newly here from Africa. I’m not saying this because of the normal “I have friends that are black” white-guy response. I say it because I was so offended by Harris-Perry’s suggestion that black people cannot move to nice neighborhoods because it’s not safe for them. I’d really like to see the statistics where black people have moved into a nice neighborhood and have been gunned down while the authorities look away. I know it happens sometimes and of course it was much more like that back in the day. I know there are idiots that will light a cross up from time to time. But how many black children are being gunned down in nice neighborhoods otherwise filled with white people?
It is not going to help me and my ethnic neighbors for people in her position to forward such a disgraceful and all out dishonest narrative. It is not going to help me the next time I want to say hi to a black person. It’s going to further divide us and I think we have had enough of that.
I don’t want to hang my head in shame for things that are not real. I get that generations will pay for the unfair treatment many have endured and we are a long way away from that ever going away. But let’s solve the problem with honest debate, not an incendiary one. Just as white people should not be telling black people to “get over it already”, black people should not be suggesting that white people are out gunning them down. And white people should not further that discussion by agreeing.
If a black family from my neighborhood somehow accidentally ended up in the bad areas of Chicago, or east LA, they would be profiling those young black men as much as any white person. And they would be afraid in that environment. And if I ended up somewhere face to face with the Aryan Nation, I too would have that same fear. And I think all of that is justified – many people are violent in this country.
As long as there are groups of people committing terrible acts of violence, people will fear them. Crime is real. No one can turn that off in the name of peace and love. Instincts are what they are. One thing Harris-Perry said on TV today is that white people fear black people because all they see is black people portrayed as criminals. And I understand that completely. It made me think about all the TV shows and movies where the black thug is the person that is feared. It absolutely has been shoved down our throat. But it also made me think of the nightly news where black people are responsible for so many of the murders and other crime in this country. That’s a sad fact and frankly, how could it have turned out any other way when you oppress a group of people for so long? But until that is resolved, no one is ever going to stop worrying about people if they look or act a certain way.
The thing about a case like this is that it is absolutely something that should have never happened. No one was doing anything wrong to begin with and however that fight started, it shouldn’t have. We can say that people shouldn’t be suspicious of a guy walking through a neighborhood in the rain, maybe because he’s black. But then we have to be honest and say well, if all the robberies in the neighborhood are committed by black people, the human brain will never allow for us to turn that instinct off.
I absolutely think it is ok for people to wish that he had gotten a manslaughter charge. I get that. I really don’t know either way. But I don’t think it’s ok to say that white people are hunting down and killing black people and that it is ok now as a matter of law. That’s a far more racist statement in my opinion.
It sucks to get to a certain age in life and realize there are certain problems in society that you hate and will not be solved in your lifetime. I don’t get to see the day we all wish would hurry up and get here.
I’m thankful that there was no real violence in the aftermath of the verdict. I started this thread wondering what people thought the potential for unrest was and it’s good to be here all these days later with those worries in the past. But I fear what I feel tonight is worse than worrying about someone stealing a TV or rolling a cop car. People on television are telling the black community that if they come to my neighborhood, we will hunt them down. I really hate that.
