Blueskies wrote: I appreciate you speaking without a bunch of name calling and in a rationed manner. The problem here is that I'm tired of all the bull crap that has been going on here for a long time.
You are not the only one. Unfortunately, at this point in time, you are the only one who can make this particular line of crap stop.
Blueskies wrote: Y'all haven't been honest yet.
I have not told a single lie; I do not lie. Ever.
Blueskies wrote:Nice speech you wrote here, very well prepared and I'm sure it took you some time.
Only as long as it took to write.
Blueskies wrote:Problem is its not reality.
It's my reality, and you have no way of determining what I think or how I feel, other than by what I say. I don't presume to tell you how you see the world, I only point out that others do not see it in the same way. I would appreciate it if you do me the courtesy of refraining from telling me what I really think; I find it offensive and highly hypocritical coming from you.
Blueskies wrote: You have carried a grudge towards me for awhile.
No, I have carried a lot of frustration about you, based on your ongoing attitudes. If you would stop judging other people, and start taking responsibility for the hurt and the upset you cause, I would thank you in an instant and never raise the matter again. I don't waste my life with grudges.
Blueskies wrote:The reality is you made a diss thread, plan and simple no matter how you try to justify it as a "joke" it was wrong.
I don't justify it as a joke; it IS a joke, and one based on a great deal of frustration with you. It needs no justification.
Blueskies wrote: The truth is it's also not the first time you've done it.
So lets return to why you personally hold a grudge.
Again, please refrain from telling me what I feel and what I think. I don't do that to you, please don't do it to me.
Blueskies wrote:You made a thread here once to have a go at SPFanInOregon after you and a couple other women here decided you didn't like her, started gossiping about her and wanted her gone.
No, I didn't.
You decided that was what happened, and no matter how many times you were told that isn't true, you've kept repeating that lie. I would appreciate it if you stopped.
Blueskies wrote:Some here ( you know who you are) targeted her and started harassing her whenever she posted. So on top of that then YOU thought it would be "funny" to make a thread sarcastically making fun of her. One that was also disrespectful towards some peoples religion. In that thread I called you on it. Of course you denied what you were doing then too and tried to justify it somehow but you knew, your friends knew, I knew and she especially knew exactly what you were doing.
No, you took a thread that
no one else found offensive, made a huge fuss, turned it into a place for you to spout off again, and got so many people wound up about what you were doing that the thread got deleted. I spoke to SPiffy, she accepted that I was sincere in not targetting her, and we have been fine with each other ever since. The only person who has a problem with that whole episode was you.
Blueskies wrote:She thanked me for sticking up for her when no one else would. You didn't seem to care if you hurt her feelings or not you just wanted a laugh at her expense.
Again, no I didn't;
YOU decided that was what I was doing. The only person LLL and I were laughing at were ourselves and our own occaisionally obsessive (and rather embarrassing) behaviour. Several other people joined in, recognising it was a joke to be directed at the self and not at anyone else; in other words, they took it in the spirit that it was meant. You were the only person who did not, and because you insisted that it was directed at SPiffy, she became upset.
Blueskies wrote:I think that is mean spirited, childish and very catty to start threads only to diss other forum members, sorry, but that's the way I see it.
And you are absolutely entitled to your opinion. I think it is shallow and passive aggressive to deliberately make posts that can only be interpreted as baiting someone into a fight. I also think it is shallow and incredibly rude to absolutely refuse to ever acknowledge that you got some thing wrong. And I think that it is mean and spiteful to make a negative post discussing how you won't support an effort, in a thread that someone made to be a positive thing. You were entitled to your opinion, but what you said and where you said it was just mean.
Blueskies wrote: If you had a problem with her why didn't YOU take it to PM?
As I said, I did exactly that and we settled things amicably. Not that it's any of your business what we said or did off the board.
Blueskies wrote: Didn't like her personality that you read into her posts either, did y'all. Andrew deleted the thread and you were steamed plenty that I called you on what you were doing.
No, I was angry that once again, you presumed to know what someone else "really meant" and kicked up a fuss about it when there was no issue until you started creating. As far as I was made aware at the time, Andrew didn't delete the thread because anyone found what I had said about the Church of St Perry offensive, he deleted it because of the bullshit that you kicked off in it.
He can correct me in that belief if I am incorrect. Also, I have no problem with SPiffy; again, please refrain from telling me what I think, and please refrain from telling me whether I like someone else or not.
Blueskies wrote: You completely lost it and sent me extremely enraged PM's cussing me out .
As I recall, I took it to PM, as I prefer generally to do when things get personal, and you completely over-reacted, made several threats and told me you would never respond to anything I ever said again. I freely admit that I was very angry at the time. However, part of my extreme anger was based on some incredibly rude PMs I had received from you in the past, in addition to my extreme anger at being called a liar.
I do not lie, ever. I am human, I make mistakes, and when I realise that I have, I like to think I am mature enough to do what I can to make amends, but
I do not ever lie. I have no reason to and I do not see that it ever helps a situation.
Blueskies wrote: I would not fight with you and told you not to send me any more PM's and you just wouldn't listen. You sure the heck weren't being rational and just trying to talk it over calmly by no means and you sure didn't make an attempt to talk again about it or apologize for those PM's.
As I recall, you point blank refused to address a single thing I said, and made several threats against me. Moreover, I still hold I had nothing to appologise to you for then, and I have nothing to appologise for to you now.
Blueskies wrote:Now you try to make out that the thread I linked today was the first one you started about me?
I said nothing of the sort. Please have the courtesy not to put words in my mouth.
Blueskies wrote: Ha! You were so pissed you took a page out of Behshads book and started a couple here on this forum too with my name right in the topic.
I don't need to take a leaf out of anyone's book - my words and my actions are always my own. I don't post to try and impress someone else, I don't post to be part of a club. My opinions are mine, based on what I observe and experience.
Blueskies wrote:They were the same kind of bull crap attack threads that Behshad has started about me a number of times.
I can only take your word for that; I tend to skip over B's posts when he's in rant mode, especially when he's getting crude. I don't like reading that sort of rubbish, so I tend to just skip it.
Blueskies wrote:Andrew deleted yours too and he made mention to y'all that he wasn't having that nonsense on here.
I believe you were included in that statement, my dear.
Blueskies wrote:He emphatically stated that he didn't want threads started with the sole purpose to diss another forum member.
I must have missed that post - please show it to me. As I said, regardless of what you have decided, the Church of St Perry thread was not directed at SPiffy. In fact, I can point you to well over a dozen posts that were made up to six months before that thread was started where LLL and I joked about the Church of St Perry; I believe that the joke actually dates back to before SPiffy joining the board.
Blueskies wrote:So when that didn't work you stated stalking my posts like a lunatic and did the same thing Yulog did for so long.
Sorry? What are you talking about? I know how Yulog posts, I certainly do not make the same kind of posts. Again, please refrain from putting words in my mouth, and I will thank you not to imply that I make the same kind of obscene posts Yulog is capable of.
Blueskies wrote:It didn't matter what thread I posted in or how benign the post was you were there to make some sarcastic comment and then you just started with the 'yes Phyllis' garbage after my posts regardless of what my post was about..
Yes, I did respond with 'yes Phyllis', but not to every post you made, just the ones that I thought were judgemental, hypocritical, malicious or provocative. I still hold that's the only way to get you to stop your self-aggrandising rants; by taking away any handle you find to keep a fight going, but making you aware that your view is not supported.
Blueskies wrote:Come on who are you trying to kid, that was not innocent on your part that was nothing but harassment.
I don't believe that it was harrasment, but I accept that you may have felt that way.
Blueskies wrote: Did I get into it with you when you did that? No, I just ignored you.
No, you did not ignore me; if you had, I would have had no incentive to keep posting.
Blueskies wrote: There was no excuse for it either...the whole time you were doing it I was not in any tiff with anyone.
The whole reason why I was doing it was because you were being provocative and appeared to baiting for a fight, after a full week of doing exactly that.
Blueskies wrote:You were relentless, so much so that Andrew even noticed it without me saying a word to him and he told you to knock it off. Only then did you stop.
Yes, I stopped when the moderator asked me to stop. I talked to him about it in PM, and why he asked me to stop; the reason is not the one you give. Nor was the request to stop directed solely at me; you were included in that request.
Blueskies wrote:You took a couple more opportunities after that to write out long "assessments " of me after that though, didn't you.
Yes, because funnily enough, I still keep hoping you will listen one day to what people are saying to you, and change your style. As I have said many times, you have some good, interesting things to say; unfortunately they tend to get lost in the chaos, upset and aggression you incite. I have thoroughly enjoyed some of the posts you have made; I wish they were not in the minority. I also intensly dislike the abuse that is thrown your way, and I wish it would stop. Sadly, it isn't going to stop until you prove you can refrain from passing judgement on everyone else, and stop pulling up stuff from the past that should be allowed to let lie.
Blueskies wrote:And know you tell me how tired "everyone" is of me? First of all you can't speak for "everyone" you can only speak for yourself and the little group of friends you have.
That's half-true. You are right, I can only speak for myself. I based my assumption on what I have seen posted in this thread and numerous other threads, and extrapolated that others were feeling the same as I am. However, I don't have a 'little group of friends'. I certainly have several friends on this board, but my relationship with any one person on this board is entirely seperate from my friendship with anyone else on this board. I don't discuss you, or anyone else on this board, with them if I can avoid it . I don't like PM gossip, and I avoid it when I can as I know how much damage and hurt it can do.
Blueskies wrote: I don't have a problem with "everyone" and "everyone" doesn't have a problem with me. You look at the number of views of this thread now. If y'all think that everyone that's been reading it are all in agreement with the group of you that keep going with this then youre delusional.
You do realise that view count is not the same thing as the number of people who read a thread, don't you?
It's hard to draw the conclusion that there is a group of people who support your stance in this matter when there is
not one person who has posted in support of your view. I certainly invite anyone who does hold that position to do so, with no negative response (from me at least.)
Blueskies wrote:Now I know y'all will come back and say that I am the only one who wants to keep this going but get real, if you are going to write a bunch of condemnation like you just did I have the right to respond to it. You sure the heck would if I wrote the same to you first and you know it.
I haven't condemned you. I have given my view of what is going on, in the hope that you will see there is a different point of view than yours, and in the hope that you will use that and start mending some bridges. Nor have I said anything about you not having the right to respond; again, please refrain from putting words in my mouth. I did ask that you respond to a specific question first; a question you have not answered.
Blueskies wrote:As for your "one question" .. due to Behshads "poll" I guess I would need more then your clique to tell me since the vote was in my favor.
I don't remember B's poll, I must have missed it. And once again, I am not part of a clique; again, please refrain from telling me what I do and what I think.
Blueskies wrote:Seems there are more people that want me around then your group wants to think.
Again, please show me these posts in your support. As far as I can see, I'm the one who is supporting you the most, as I've asked the guys to lay off with the insults, and I've repeatedly said I think you can be a good person to have around when you aren't being judgemental and provocative.
Blueskies wrote: Maybe everyone hasn't bought into the propaganda campaign that y'all launched , ya think?
There is no campaign, there is no group out to get you. There are a lot of very different people who all seem to be fed up with you. Again, please stop telling me what I think and what I do off-board; you have no way of knowing either.
Blueskies wrote: I'll put the same question to you : When are you going to be honest?
I am being honest; I cannot help it if you refuse to accept my word on that. I would like you to answer the question I asked, please.
Blueskies wrote:First with yourself and then with everyone else?
Again, please refrain from telling me what I think.
Blueskies wrote:When are any of you going to take responsibility for YOUR actions?
I have taken responsibility for everything I have ever posted. Moreover, when it is pointed out that I am wrong, I acknowledge it and apologise. Are you able to do the same?
Blueskies wrote: Not a single one of your clique...
Again, I am not part of any clique. Please refrain from repeating this untruth.
Blueskies wrote:...has taken responsibility for anything and just keep putting the bickering all on me.
As far as I can see from this thread, we have all taken responsibility for our own words. However, I can find two seperate occaisions in this thread alone where you appear to be deliberately baiting people into having a fight with you. I can also point to numerous posts in this thread when you have twisted part of what someone said, and ignored the rest of their post, in order to suit your own ends, and point you to several posts in this thread where you have done precisely what you have told someone else off for doing.
Blueskies wrote:It's flat out propaganda and you know it. I had good reason to get onto you as I stated above.
No, you had a
personal reason. That isn't the same thing as a good reason. I'm not really sure what dragging up something that happened nearly a year ago was supposed to achieve; it certainly didn't address any of the issues I raised.
Blueskies wrote:What you were doing was not funny and was hurtful to someone. If it hadn't of been I wouldn't have said a word to you.
You didn't say a word to me, you made a very public attack based on a lie you created that you decided was the truth, and you flat out refused to listen to anything anyone else said on the matter.
Blueskies wrote:In fact before you did that I had complimented you on your intelligence.
I don't remember the compliment, but thank you for it. It doesn't alter my opinion of what you are doing now.
Blueskies wrote:I still think you are quite intelligent but honestly you can be quite a bitch sometimes...
Very true. Most people can be, yourself included.
Blueskies wrote:... and that was what you were being towards that woman and then towards me after I said something about it...
No, I will say it again - you decided that I was making a post directed as SPiffy; that was not what happened, it was shown then that your assessment was incorrect, and I got very angry with you for calling me a liar.
Blueskies wrote:...and then you showed me your temper big time.
Yes, I did. I will get that angry with anyone who takes something I have said totally out of context and then repeatedly tells me I am a liar, despite all evidence to the contrary.
Blueskies wrote:You also must admit that although you say the thread you made this week was "just a joke" that others may see it as being sarcastic and quite frankly, catty....especially me!
Of course it is sarcastic! If it wasn't sarcastic, it wouldn't be a joke. And it probably is catty. So?
Blueskies wrote:Y'all need to start being honest about what caused the spat in the first place...
Sorry, what spat are we talking about? Are you still talking about the Church of St Perry thread? As far as I am concerned, once the initial crap died down, the whole matter was dead. To tell the truth, I don't see why you're bringing it up now; it's dead and buried, let it lie. As for what has been going on this week, you annoyed a hell of a lot of people with your mean comments in the thread about supporting Andrew, and it's been bubbling along in this thread that you hijacked away from it's initial purpose, which was discussing the current employment climate, with some supportive comments for Thenightbull.
Blueskies wrote:...you also need to start being honest when you say "we've all tried "..tried what?
We have tried in this thread, and others, to make you understand that your style of passive aggresive attacks and your hypocritcally judgemental attitudes get right up people's noses.
Blueskies wrote:You PM'ed me to fight and the rest of your group haven't Pm'ed to "talk it over" at all.
Sorry - what? The last time I PM'd you was last July. So what fight am I supposed to have PM'd you about now?
Blueskies wrote:The only thing your group...
Again - I am not part of a group, please refrain from telling me what I do.
Blueskies wrote:... does is jump in to bitch at me at every opportunity y'all find and make random derogatory remarks even if I'm not even here or in a thread or on another forum.
You are partly right here. There is a lot of bitching about you. Funnily enough, it rarely happens when you aren't making judgemental or provocative posts.
Blueskies wrote:None of you have admitted to a single thing
Sorry, what am I supposed to be admiting to?
Blueskies wrote:... except Donna when she said in this thread that no I had not done anything to anyone in Florida and I was nice and that it was afterwards on this forum when I got onto Dean and they took it that I wasn't appreciative that the problem began.
This sentence doesn't make sense, but I as I read it, it isn't what Donna said.
Blueskies wrote: I thank her for finally saying that. It was big of her to speak the truth to what actually happened. Y'all should do the same.
Again, please refrain from telling me that I am lying when I am not and I do not.
Blueskies wrote:And when you say I never have taken responsibility for anything, that's not true at all. I was mistaken with Carla and I readily admitted that at the time...
No you did not. I don't presume to speak for her, but at that time, you did not admit that you had been wrong, and if you apologised, it was not done publically.
Blueskies wrote: ...and apologized not once but twice. You are also wrong in saying I haven't been willing to talk or listen. There are many times I have talked about things to people in PM that you aren't aware of.
Of course I can't be aware of those things, but your public behaviour does not indicate that you have listened at all.
Blueskies wrote: One example I already mentioned in this thread was when Jim got mad at me for something I said once and he took it wrong. He apologized for calling me a name once he read the thread in PM then we talked on the phone and there has been no misunderstanding or problem between us since.
I'm glad that is the case; it's a shame you can't take a leaf out of his book and do the same to the people you offend.
Blueskies wrote:Another example is back before you were here. I was being protective of a very young girl that had started posting here and I won't name him since we didn't talk about it on the forum like Jim and I did but a guy here that still posts daily took what I had said a certain way on the board and misunderstood my reasoning. We talked in over in PM and everything was clear. We've never gotten into a disagreement since . I could give some other examples of my willingness to talk things over with folks . So for you to say I'm not willing to talk is incorrect.
I wouldn't presume to comment on things that happened before I posted here. My personal experience of you is that you will not talk things over with people you are attacking or making judgement calls on. Again, I have to ask - why are you dragging up things that have happened in the past instead of addressing what is happening here and now?
Blueskies wrote: I'm willing to talk things over with anyone but you have to be willing to talk honestly in return. You haven't been here, Ari, all you and some others have done is put the blame on me.
Again, please stop telling me what I think. I believe there are several people who enjoy baiting you and I wish they would knock it off, but I also believe you incite a lot of the reaction you get, and I find it very difficult to believe that you cannot be aware of how offensive, aggressive, judgemental and hypocritical some of your posts are, or that many of your posts are not deliberately made to get a reponse.
Blueskies wrote:You know as well as I do that continued attacks and name calling and all not being honest and when everyone doesn't take responsibility for their own actions then nothing will get resolved.
Again, this sentence makes no sense, but I think I understand what you are saying. I'll respond with - will you take responsibility for the upset you have caused and the insulting posts you have made? Will you take responsibility for your own actions and genuinely make some apologies?
Blueskies wrote: Seems clear to me that your group isn't looking for resolution at all.
Again, I am not part of a group, please stop saying I am.
Blueskies wrote:You just want to make it out to be on me and continue to ostracise and try to eliminate.
I don't want to elimate you; I'd like to see 'fun' Phyllis posting rather than 'Martyr And Moral Authority' Phyllis posting. I'd like to see you posting something fresh and inciteful, instead of pulling up past shit. I'd like to see you regain the respect of some of the people here, by refraining from being judgemental and hypocritical.
Blueskies wrote:That's why I have kept in this thread because I do not have to stand by and let things be said of me without answer. You wouldn't either. There have been many times I have ignored an attack and let it go but I'm not letting it go any more. Enough's enough.
Yes, it is enough - and unfortunately, as I said before, you are the only one who can end it.
Blueskies wrote: Either you make an honest effort to resolve the conflict or you go...
Could you please re-read that statement. And read it again. Now, please show me where you have tried to resolve anything? I've seen a lot of posts attacking, and a lot of posts justifying yourself, but I haven't seen any that I recall where you try to resolve anything.
Blueskies wrote:y'all go about your business and I'll go about mine.
When SPH tried to do that, you kept pushing her. If you are going to tell us what to do with regards to something, please make sure you are squeaky-clean on that front.
Blueskies wrote:Just know that if you talk about me in the open then I have every right to respond and will if I choose.
I never said you didn't, or you shouldn't. I did ask you a question, one you still haven't answered.
Blueskies wrote:The only thing y'all have "tried to do" is attack, not resolve.
No, I did not attack; I explained what I saw happening, and I asked you a question, which I will ask again, and I hope this time you will answer it before you respond to anything else in my post. Please note - I have not said you should not respond to what I've said in my post, I am asking you answer the question
first.
How many people have to say 'enough, I'm tired of your behaviour and attitude' before you will admit that maybe
you are wrong, maybe
you are the problem.[/quote]
Why treat life as a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving in an attractive & well-preserved body? Get there by skidding in sideways, a glass of wine in one hand, chocolate in the other, body totally worn out, screaming WOOHOO! What a ride!